Life — June 19, 1902 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

="OuR FOOLISH. (ONTEMPORARYE “You didn't eleep well,” his wife told him in the morn- * he answered dismally, “I had a night automo- bile."—Chicago Evening Post. “Say,” eaid the first messenger boy, **Snaketoothed Desert Demon,’ is a pretty long story, ain't it?” plied the other, ** Yer kin do it easy in two CALIFORNIA IN LESS THAN THREE DAYS via Chicago and North-Western, Union Pacific, and South. ern Pactflc Ratiways, from Chicago. The electric-lighted “ Overiand Limited " provides the best of everythiug. Diversity of routes; finest scenery, Compartment obser- vation cara, buffet-library cars (with barber and bath); dining cars, All agents sell tickets via this route. “ Tarrow away that vile cigar." “Not much, mister; go an‘ find yer own batt !* — Ohio State Journal. “ Don't pat on eo many verbal frills. Talk to mein the United States language.”* “Yes? Which—Kanaka, Aleut, Tagalog, Indian, Spanieb, Danieh, Boston, or Missouri ?"— Chicago Tribune HOTELS CHAMBERLIN and HYGEIA, Old Point Comfort.Va. Golf Links, Visitors at Chamberlin and Hygela have golf privileges. Arren all, Mr. Bryan was somewhat like Moses, Ie led his people into the wilderneea—nnd r tem dar,” as the negro preacher said. —New York World. Asgep why be had left hell out of a recent sermon, Brother Dickey “ Ever'thing to his season, Whilet I waz a-preachin* dat sermon, de thermometer wuz in de nineties, en hell spoke fer itee'f !""—Atlanta Constitution. A PORE JUICE! A natural ferment! The ingredients which compose Cook's Imperial Extra Dry Champagne. * Pur not your trust in riches,” said the clerical-looking man in the rusty coat. “don't,” replied the prosperous-looking individual “I pat my riches in trasts."—CAtcago Mews. ** You are an authority on history, I believe?" No,” replied the scholar sadly, “I used to be before esis reading historical novels.""— Chicago Poet, HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. The Ideal hotel of America for permanent and transtent guests, ‘Wire: I'm afraid you won't be well enough to go with me to Mra. Swagger's progressive euchre party to night. Hvenanp: I'm afraid I will, —OAto State Journal, ‘Tue Irish witness very often contributes to the gaicty of the courtroom, and not infrequently, as in the case of ‘one whom the Baltimore Sun quotes, by mixing some truth with his wit, Ask your Doctor about the good of beer. He will confirm what we tell you— That barley-malt is a half-digested food, as good as food can be. That hops are an excellent tonic. That the little alcohol in beer—only 3:% —is an aid to digestion. That he prescribes beer for the weak. But Purity is Essential But he will tell you that beer, being a sac- charine product, must be protected from germs, and must be brewed in absolute cleanliness. That it should be cooled in filtered air. That the beer itself should be filtered. And, as an extreme precaution, every bottle should be sterilized. He'll say, too, that age is important, for age brings perfect fermentation. Without it, beer ferments on the stomach, causing biliousriess. When he tells you that he has practically prescribed Schlitz. Schlitz beer is brewed with all these precautions. It is the recognized standard all the world over, because of its purity. Ask for the brewery bottling. It was a suit bronght by an instalment house to obtain payment for some furniture. The defendant, an Irishman, | ed if he knew what “quartered oak" meant, | ~Sare, sor,” was the quick reply, “it means that it's thra-quarthers poine.""— Exchange. CENTER OF THE CITY OF NEW YORK. New York Central’s Grand Central Station, comicbooks.com