Life — May 8, 1902 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

-LIFE- Oyster-Crabs. THREE viands in three different courses served Received the commendation they deserved ‘The first in succulence all else sur- paseed ; ‘The next in flavor ; and in both, the last For Nature's forces could no further go; To make the third, she joined the other two Carolyn Wells. A Question of Humor. THERE is, of course, the anti-caccinationist who, like all faddists, is deficient in a sense of Aumor, just a8 he 1s deficient in the power to Judge is subject fairly from a broad view of every side. —Lancet, London, Well, well! Our playful contemporary forgets that the 1 of a practical joke is less likely to t hilarity than the perpetrator. The instance, who protests in vain against having his ears and tail cut off, displays. less of a certain kind of humor than the man who works the knife. So the Lancet should, in justice, pardon an absence of hilarity in the anti-vaceinationist who is compelled by law to see his wife and children submit to a treat- ment in which he bas no confidence and whose results are often the reverse of mirth-provoking. [HE papers say that perhaps the Tampa Bay Hotel, at Tampa, Florida, may be given to the Jesuits for college by Mrs. Plant, widow of its late owner, whowill endow it with a million dollars. Persons who think that Jesuit colleges are a good thing for this country will rejoice that we are to havea new one. Persons who think that they do no country any good may find comfort in the loca- tion of this prospective new one, where it can be a buffer between us and Yellow Jack. The Soul of a Cockney. 1] 0 dwell with city sounds and sights, And long for country quiet, For dewy dawns and fragrant nights, And bird songs running riot ; ‘To sigh for spring's green, tender birth, Or autumn'’s regal burning— That is the dearest pain on ‘That is the sweetest yearning. But, oh, to stroll by grove and beach, And hear the birds veciferant, And know that town is out of reach— That's someway very different ! auliet Will or Tompkins. 399 Notes from the Philippines. *ORPORAL SLICEM of the Sixty-second Exter- minators has been court-martialed for coward- ice, He refused to emancipate three young Tagalogs, saying that they wriggled so they made him think of babies. Brig.-Gen. Bludd is now being referred to as the Patrick Henry of the Army on account of his cable to the Department, ‘‘ We'll give them slavery or give them death.” Two native women have been seen at large near Kilkil, Island of Soondie. A sergeant and ten men have been sent out, and they will be civilized at sight. It is ramored that the Society of Foreign Wars is to inaugurate a special department with eligibility de- pendent upon proof of the personal assimi one or more Filipinos. It is to be called the $ of the Sons of Slaughter. ‘The Department has opened a recruiting office at the Chicago Stock Yards. It is feared that the abattoirs will be obliged to close for lack of skilled labor. Reducing It to a Science. “rPHERE'S going to bea meeting of the New York Central directors.”’ “ What for?” y,to decide about improvements in graveyard and accidents.’” The Fool: you sew it's THIS WAY. THE KING SAID THAT IPT DIDN'T GET HIM IN 1D UUMOK TO-DAY HE WOULD WAVE ME BEUEADED, $0 I KIDNAPPED THE QUEEN. comicbooks.com