Life — April 10, 1902 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

+ LIFE: 205 It Beats Him. “ ELLO, the dev —er—Mephis- _ topheles, I believe,” I ejaculated, as a blue flame flared suddenly in my library and a crimson-clad party ap- peared across the table from me. “The identification is exact,” replied the crimson one, with a suave smile. “Oh, I've seen Lewis Morrison,” I observed. ‘ And to what happy chance do I owe the pleasure of this call?” “T was just passing, and took the opportunity for dropping in,” ex- claimed Mephisto, with an air he tried to make appear indifferent. ‘It occurred to me that possibly we might agree on terms to-night.” “What are you offering these days?" I asked, push- ing the cigar box over to him. ‘Same old bunch of “No, thanks ; I've quit. The hot smoke affects my lungs I find,” refused Mephisto, shoving the cigars back with a regretful look. “ Why, yes; I don't have to change my inducements much to hold my custom, you know,” he continued, thoughtfully. ‘‘ For instance, I éan offer you renewed youth.” I laughed. “Why do you think I yearn to make assorted varieties of asses of myself all over again?” 1 asked. “ Well, let me see; how about unlimited wealth?” “NOBODY SENDS ME FLOWERS ANY MORE.” queried Mephisto “ WHY, MY DEAR CHILD, HERE ARE SOME THAT CAME TO-DAY. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?” ‘3 5 “OH, THEY DON'T COUNT. THEY RE IN 8BASON.” “You seem to forget, that Iam not a victim of the free-library-gift habit,” I replied, shaking my head. = “A prolonged life?” suggested Mephisto, “Haven't I enough troubles now?" I said. “Wine, woman, and song?” said Mephisto. “And me a married man!” I cried, scandalized, ‘Infinite knowledge? ” said Mephisto. I sat up, and eyed him keenly. “Is that possible?” I de- manded, earnestly. “Certainly,” he replied, with a satisfied chuckle, “I will make you the wisest of mankind. ‘There is not a branch of learning in which your name shall not be illustrious.” “Pooh!” I said, scornfully, ‘I'm not a candidate for a string of letters after my name.” Mephistopheles raised his eyebrows. “ But if you can tell me what I want to know,” I continued, eagerly, “you can bring on any old bond you happen to have with you, and I'll sign it without submitting it to my lawyer first even.” “And that is?” asked Mephisto, anxiously. “The true situation in the Philippines,” I cried, urgently, There was another flare of blue flame, and my visitor's seat stood empty. But before he left I heard him grumble, “ The impertinent curiosity of some people beats the devil.” Alez, Ricketts, The Actress ; 80 THEY'KE REALLY GOING 10 BE TAKEN AT LAST! “W HEN at last a physician came and settled atnong them, the people wondered. Practically Nothing. “ Nobody is ever sick here,”’ they said. |ASTLETON: I don't suppose you care much whether you “Of course not, with no medical assistance at hand," sell your country place or not. said the doctor, smiling at their simplicity in spiteof | Voy Bucwer: No. I haven't made any effort so far. I have his determination to be courteous, only offered it at one-half of what it cost me. comicbooks.com