Life — February 27, 1902 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

168 Life’s Anecdote Contest. Nowper 99. T, Aide-de-camp to the Grand Duke of Saxe-Weimar, congratulated Bis- marck at Versailles on January 15th, 1871, on the excellent relations existing between the German Chancellor and his namesake, Count Beust, the Austrian Minister. “Yea,” sald Bismarck, © that ts all very well ; but It always reminds me of the story of the elater who, In falling from a tower, remarked as he passed each story,‘ All's well, so far 1""—Con- tersations with Prince Bismarck, Collected by Helnrich Von Poschinger. Harper and Brothers, 1900, Newser 40, “ Several years ago, there labored in one of the Western villages of Minnesota, a preacher who Was always in the babit of selecting his texts from the Old Testament, and particularly some portion of the history of Noah, No matter what the occaston was, he would always find some parallel incident from the history of this great character that would readily serve as a text or illustration, * Atone time he was called upon to unite the Gaughter of the village mayor and a prominent attorney in the holy bonds of matrimony, Two llt- tle boys, knowing his determination to give them. & portion of the sacred bistory touching Noah's marriage, hit upon the novel idea of pasting together two leaves in the family Bible so as to connect, without any apparent break, the mar- riage of Noah and the descr of the Ark of the Covenant. “When the noted guests were all assembled and the contracting Parties with attendants in their respective stations, the preacher began the ceremonies by reading the following text: ‘And when Noah was one hundred and forty years old, he took unto himself a wire’ (then turning the page he continued) ‘three hundred cubits In length, fifty cubits in width, and thirty cublts tn depth, and within and without besmeared with pitch.’ ‘The story seemed a little strong, but he could not doubt the Bible, and after reading it once more and reflecting a ‘moment, he turned to the startled assem- Dlage with these remarks : ‘My beloved brethren, this 1s the first time tn the his. tory of my life that my attention has been calied to this Important passage of the Scriptures, but it seems to me that tt {sone of the most forcible illustrations * LIFE money to be paid,—Prom Cyclopedia of Wit and Wisdom. §, Johnson and Son, Manchester, England, 1845. Relating to Thorndike. EATH and Science still work merrily together. From the Zoophilist, of Lon- don, wecut the fol- lowing. The Zoophi- list took it, with proper credit, from tho Journal, of Central Falls, R. I. It is ‘* good stuff,’ and two voyages across the Atlantic have not damaged it. Professor Thorndike, of the Western Reserve University, 1s. bright and shining light, a star of the first magnitude in the heaven of sclentific etbics, With a blare of brass trumpets he pro- claims his splendid discovery that animals have no continuous consciousness of pain. The jolly fellow, who skinned bis cat and dog and enjoyed thelr comical antics as they merrily scampered around his yard unul death robbed the fun-loving man ot his amusement, was there- fore innocent of any particular wrong, because, ‘ag Thorndike sagely informs us, animals have no continued consciousness of pain. How nice such sctentific knowl- edge must be for the sportive man who. gives his half-starved horse his dally beatings and so frequently whangs wud bangs bis half-fed oxen with the cart-stake | We are sorry to say, however, that the pablio looks upon Professor Thorndike, not as the dis- covering Columbns of a new sctentific continent, bat as a cold-blooded wretch who Is endeavoring to cloak his flendish crimes with the wrap of talse aclence. However, the truly great and good are seldom appreciated. Also in the Zoophilist, which seems to be furnishing us with items from our own papers this week, we seo that Our American contemporary, the Animals’ Defender, says that Professor Dickson, of Yale, has lately, at Mndian Creek, Colo., cut @ rattle- snake and an adder in two and sewed the rear half of the latter to the front haif of the former. ‘The composite snake continued to live, to the edification of tts medical observers, Further entertainment was then aiforded by the intro- daction tuto the cage of alive rabbit, which the snake was allowed to bie, The rabbit awelled up and, after an hour's suffering, dled, How the humane and merciful vivisectors do work and sutfer for the ** benefit of humanity‘! of that grand eternal truth, that the nature of woman 4 exceedingly dificult to compretend.’ *—From Star- light Messenger. at St. Peter, Minn., 1805, Nowper 31. Published by the Literary Circle ** George the First, on a journey to Hanover, stopped at @ village in Holland, and while the horses were getting reads, he asked for two or thri brought him, and charged two hundred florins, “How 13 this?” sald his Majesty. Very scarce In this place.”* Pardon me,” sald the host kings are scarce." The Ki eggs are plenty, bat smiled aud ordered the gaa, which were “Eggs must be ACC. TO JOUN BULL, comicbooks.com