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Life, 1901-06-06 · page 20 of 28

Life — June 6, 1901 — page 20: what you’re looking at

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Life — June 6, 1901 — page 20: Life, 1901-06-06

What you’re looking at

This page contains two distinct satirical pieces typical of Life magazine's early 1900s content. **"The Game Wall Street" section** mocks stock market speculation and investor naïveté. It ridicules wealthy speculators holding worthless Northern Pacific stocks, comparing buying industrial stocks to purchasing "pigs in a poke" (blind bargains). The satire targets J.P. Morgan's influence—his rumored return to New York is expected to "stir up" the dormant market. The piece criticizes investors who blindly hand money to brokers without demanding transparency about companies' actual business operations. **"A Soldier's Description of the Philippines"** uses absurdist humor to satirize American imperialism following the Spanish-American War. The Philippines are described as a chaotic land of "hoodooism," disease, and constant hardship, with inhabitants engaged in "trench building and bolo manufacturing" (weapons production). This reflects anti-imperialist sentiment—mocking both the colonial enterprise and romanticized notions of "civilizing missions" in the Pacific territories.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Gane Hindsight. sno stock, however watched and tended, But proves for lambs a snare, And no investment, though by bull de- fended, Escapes at last the bear. 3 «¢ DRAYERS, for those at Sea” will be heard in every Wall Street office as soon as it is learned that Mr. Morgan has embarked for New York. At present writing, stocks have fallen into a condition of inactivity, which Mr. Morgan's return is expected to do something in the way of stirring up. 3 $ $ ‘HE truth is that the market has got tacks on its liver. These are in the form of accumulations of stock which speculators acquired before the day of the Northern Pacific corner. They have managed to hang on to them, but to dispose of them at present prices means taking a loss. At the first sign of a rising market these accumulations are trotted out and any tendency towards an advance is promptly smothered. Unless Mr. Morgan's return brings about new rumors and new undertakings which will start another boom, Wall Street might as well shut up shop for the summer and go off to Europe or the Pan-American, & 8 3 W BY is it that many a man who would look coldly on the most seductive offers of the gold-brick ven- ders and spurn with contempt the allur- ing bargains of the green goods mer- chants will blindly give up his good money for indastrials which never furnish any informatiou to their stockholders about their business? Buying a pig in a poke is a sage pro- ceeding compared to buying industrial stocks for investment. % $ 3 ‘] ‘HE traditional affability of the Wall Street broker, which was re- placed during the boom market by the brusqueness of the book-maker just before a big race, is once more to be enjoyed by actual or possible customers. 3 3 3 GETS on the Stock Exchange are ‘offered at sixty thousand dollars, a decline of ten thousand dollars from the high point, Another indication of the dull times to be expected during the summer. 3 3 NE thing in Wall Street that has been going up regularly all this spring and has been carried steadily by some of the heaviest operators on both sides of the market—the ordinary um- brella of commerce. 3 3 3 WALL STREET professed to be deeply interested in the Porto Rican decision, doubtless because there was nothing else doing. Likewise old checker boards and other means of passing time which disappeared from the broker shops during the boom have again made their appearance. 3 3 3 CAPITAL FELLOW—your Uncle Russell Sage. A, Land, A Soldier's Description of the Philippines. HE Philippines are a bunch of trouble, gathered upon the west- ern horizon of civilization. They are bounded on the west by hoodooism and smugglers, on the north by rocks and destruction, ov the east by typhoons, and on the south by can- nibals and earthquakes. The climate is a deceptive combina- tion of changes well adapted to rais- ingCain. It is pleasant for mosquitoes, ants, lizards, bats, snakes, tarantulas, roaches, scorpions, centipedes and alligators. ‘The inhabitants are very industrious. Their leading occupations are trench building and bolo manufacturing. Their houses are made chiefly of bamboo and landscape. Their principal amusements are cock-fighting and stealing. The priucipal diets are fried rice, boiled rice, stewed rice and rice rice The animal of burden is the caribou (water buffalo). Should a hundred- mile journey be undertaken with this animal, the driver would die of old age before reaching his destination. Manila is the capital and principal city. It is noted for its large number of saloons and Chinamen. The principal exports of the islands are rice, hemp, war bulletins and dead soldiers. The imports, arms, live sol- diers and ammunition. Communication has been established between tho islands by substituting the mosquito for the carrier pigeon, the mosquito being larger and better able to stand the long journey. Taking it all in all, it is a good place (to keep away from), A SANDWITCH IGHLANDER. comicbooks.com