Life — April 18, 1901 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

= OUR FOOLISH, “= (ONTEMPORARIE: AN 0.0 LIMERICK IN answer to our inquiry, ® correspondent guarantees | the Limerick to have flourished, at any rate in the reign of Willtam IV, This ts one of several he remembers as current at his pubite school tn 1834 : ‘There was a young man at St. Kitts Who was very much troubled with Ots ; ‘The eclipse of the moon ‘Threw him into a swoon, When he tumbled and broke Into bits. — London Globe. AWARDED GOLO MEDAL. The Vartray Water Co., of Buffalo, N. Y., 1s to be con- gratulated on having been awarded the gold medal, the only and highest award, for tts now famous product, Vartray Gtoger Ale, at the Paris Exposition of 1900, thus proving that this Amertcan product ts aupertor to the Imported. The competition was open to the world, and the exhibitors numbered 611, Including the manufacturers of Belfast, Ire. EMBAS8ADOR CroaTR ta fond of telling of how the late Wiliam M. Evarts repited to an impossible toast at « Harvard dinaer which he (Choate) presided over. Instead of asking the men who were down for speeches to respond to the regu- lation toasts, Mr Choate read off a question to cach from one of the college examination papers, and then called up his Victim. The query which fell to Mr Evarts was thts: “Why ts tt that the stomach, which continually digests food, is never Iteclf digested 1”. rarts, In response, sald : have attended # guod many Harvard dinners before this, and long ago, as ® result of my experience with them, before setting ont from New York to attend one of these feasts, I always divest myself of the coats of my stomach and bang them up 1n my wardrobe.""— Argonaut. MAID, WIFE OR WIDOW, Bachelor, husband or widower, all find telephone service useful at all hours of the day.” None who values comfort, | heatness and despatch can afford to be without It, Rates In Manhattan from $5 8 month. New York Telephone Co,, 15 Dey St., 111 West 38th St. In Jalian Ralph's latest book, * An American with Lord Roberts,” ts told the story of a “ refajew," who returned to | Kimbertey after the siege. “Vell,” be said, “you bad a tough time here In Kim- berleyt" “Yes, we had an awful me,” repited bis friend, “es. pecially after the hundred-pound shells began flying about." “ Vell," was the reply, “ve had a terrible time in Cape Town also. Ve didn’t hat bomb shells, but de cooking at de hote’s vos fearful change. HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. All the attractions of hotel life, with the comforts and privacy of home. ARTHUR SIMMONS, the venerable negro attendant at the White House, was dozing, in hia chatr the other day, when an usher rushed upstairs and sald : “Man down bere wants to see Mr. Cortelyou.”” “Can't see him,” replied Arthur, with dignity. But this man says he's got to see him.” “Don’t care nothin’ about that,” sald Arthur, preparing to resume bis deze; * nobody can sce Secretary Cortelyou ; he's gone foto his sanctum sanitarium.”— Argonaut. IT 1S SPARKLING, It ts pare, tt ts effervescence, Cook's Imperial Champagne Extra Dry. Taste delicious. Bouquet excellent, “THEN what ts your reason for marrying her?" “Lbave no reason. I'm in love "Philadelphia Times. “Wars all that crowd of women over there at Bargen’s? “Shoppers who read Bargen's ‘ad* “But that's an unusually large crowd for soearly In the morning.” “1 know, but the ‘ad’ said: “Come early and avold the crowd.’ "— Exchange, * A bumper of good IIquor Wiil end & contest quicker Than Jostice, Judge or vicar; So fill a cheerful glass And let good bumor pass.” Whiskey Green Label. AT ALL FIRST-CLASS DEALERS, NEW YORK TRAP-—Style E. Price $1,500. A small dos-a-dos designed for tro persons, but capable uf carrying four. Like alt National vehicles It bas every modern improvement aud device knowa to Automobile makers. A full description of this and other vehicles in the handsomest *‘Auto Book" ever published, sent for ten cents in stamps. Illustrated pamphlet mailed free toany address The National Automobile & Electric Co, INDIANAPOLIS, IND. SHAKSPEARE SAID OD WINE IS A GOOD FAMILIAR CREATURE> LET US MAKE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THE LABEL OF THE BEST GOOD WINE RUINART CHAMPAGNE Done Brut. ae. Roose SOULE. Seg rtd Sees Cala, RARE OLD VIOLINS Remarkable values In fine solo instrnments from $50 to $10.000. Largest and finest collec: tlon in the world. Send for new catalogue ing Blographies ; fac-slaile labels, &c. 8. The Standard for Gentlemen ALWAYS EASY The Name “BOSTON GARTER” Is stamped ‘on every loop. CUSHION BUTTON «_CLASP Lies flat to the leg—never lips, Tears nor Unfastens. SOLD EVERYWHERE. Sample pair, Bilt Se. ‘Coton Ze. EN, Matled on receipt of price. FOR 23 YEARS We Have Successfully Treated CANCER. The BERKSHIRE LS SANATORIUM hasnortvals, Describe gam! 1nd we will send prepaid the most complete treatise on the subject of Cancer and Tumors ever published, aud will refer you to persons whom we have successfully treated that were almitarly afficted. DRS. W.E, BROWN & SON, No, Adams, Mass. comicbooks. com