Life — December 20, 1900 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CUTE LITTLE JOHNNY Johany with his little axe Dealt his brother orfal whacks, He don’t care if Mama kicks ; Aln’t he cute, b nly xix, — Cornell Widow. AT a recent spiritualistic meeting in Wichita, Kan., a few weeks ago, the spirit of Elijah Crosser was called for, Elijab Crosser had died there many years before, but was remem! for his Immense stature, s1x feet five Inches. A voice in the darkness sald he was Elijah, “Are sou In heaven?” asked an old-timer, * came the answer. Are you an angel, Lige?” The questioner paused, evidently having exhansted his fund of questions, and then suddenly inquired ; “ What do you measure from tip to tip, Lige?"—Argonaut, Grovse, with the other dogs of the pack, was cared for by a trustworthy young man familiairy called Wile David- son, ‘This man wasa very good dog tratner, but not a person whom you would ever suspect of chertsbing sentiment. One night, when Wilite went to the stable where the dogs had their quarters, he stumbled over Grouse, curled up on the doorstep and apparently asleep. It was the same old story. Grouse had gone tnto a neighboring yard and found the polson left there by some enemy of dogs. Some time afterward, says the writer, we were shooting dowa in Tennessee, and one night 1 was cleaning my gen when Willle was busy about something else. All at once 1 happened to glance at bis shooting coat, Now, not lovg before, I bad given him a very nice Engiish bunting coat, which I had brought over for my own u “ Why don't you wear that English coat? sald I, “the corduroy you used to like when we were up in Canada?" He made no reply, and a moment later I asked bim again : Why don’t yon wear the old corduroy I gave you? ‘Stull he failed to answer, and only bent lower over bts work. I could not see his face. Then I knew something was oat of Joint. “Davidson, man,” said 1, “what's gone wrongt Is anything the matter?" He raised hts head and looked at me. standing on bis cheeks Jength he sald : “Mr. Plum, sir, the trath 1s, 1 buried old Grouse in that coat. He knew it, and he liked it, and | wanted todo the best I could." — Forest and Stream. Big tears were He could bardly speak ; but at * Wiar are you sealing up In that envelope so carefully, Jones?” ‘Important instructions that I forgot to give my wife before I came to town this morning; | am going to send it up home.” “+ WHI your wife open it at once?” Rather! 1 bave made sure of that.” “How?” “Thave addressed ft to myself and put a big‘ private? on the corner of the envelope." — Collier's Weekly. “Dis Is terrible,* sald Meandering Mike, with a deep- drawn sigh, * What's de matter?” asked Plodding Pete, in alarm, “Here's a plece inde paper. It xays we've got muscles Inside of us that keeps np an involuntary action, Dey goes on workin’, whether we wants em to or not.” — Washington Star. Tur late Mr. Charles Keene, the artist of Punch, used to describe, with a great delight, the method of # certain man whom he called “ @ pot-house Ruskin.” This person was sitting with a friend tn an inn partor, and was baranguing the other man on matters in general, Finally the friend ventured mildly to tnterpose an objectiog. The speaker drew himself np with much dignity, “L alot aarguing with you," sald he. “I'm a-tetling you!" — London News. Vox Bucawen: What's the matter? You look sad Dimpueton: I feel sad. This morning I decetved my wife for the firat time. “On, ts that all? Pooh! that worry you." “ But It does, old man, You will recover, Don't let She caught me at it.” — Detroit Free Pres. SMALL DEALER (gently) ; T see you have transferred sour trade to my rival across the street. Mk. HiouiteaD (ecith dignity): Yes, sir, Ihave. DRALuR (more gently): May I ask, sir, what f bave done to deserve this? Mu. HiGuuRan (ith added dignity): You sent tn sour bill.— New York Weekly. “L wisi [ could think of some new and unusual Christ- mas present to surprise mamma with this year," sald Miss de Mair, wrinkling her fatr brow in deep perplexity. “How do you think she'd Ike & son-tn law?" boarsels whispered young Spoonamore, falling readily toto the oni line of thought that seemed to suggest Itself. — Chicago Tribune. Sak: Would you recommend any particular metbod of learning golf? Me: Decidedly! Co-education.— Boston Gazette. For salo national N Londoa, Company, Bream's Building, C wland, AGENTS. EUROPEAN AGENTS—Messrs. Brentano, 37 Avenue de l'Opera, Paria, Established 1823. WILSON WHISKEY. That’s All! ITHE WILSON DISTILLING CO., FSTeRBROOKS 150 Varieties For Sale by all Stationers. Werks, Candn. 3.1. THE ESTERBROOK STEEL PEN CO, 2 soto St. sew tert STEEL PENS The Esterbrook Falcon is the best-known pen in the world Write us for Sample Hinz of 12+$1.c0? 100, $7.50. RECEIVED THE GOLD MEDA chr ARROW Ow EVERY Baltimore, Md. Paris Exposition, 1900, tor purity of tobacco and excellenceof make A fragrant high-grade cigar. If you smoke them. you will buy themagain Further information furnished dealers on application. acon Stant. Te. Co. Makere 1ASth Stand Ut Ave New Vorb City = Pure,Sparkling Ite. ut. WaTER S counteracts overindulgence L Dreams of Gravel The most artistic Bist] CALENDAR Paintings by Sar- gent, Abbey, Vedder, Inness, and allthe distinguished American ‘artists are reproduced in THE GENUINE Plate ever issued, now ready: for 1901. Sendten(10)centsin Postage stamps for copy, to CHAS. S. LEE, General Passenger Agent, Lehigh Valley Railroad, 26 Cortlandt Street, New York Sold at the Art Stores. Highest award coid medal, Paris Exposition, given there leatioe pictures of America. ‘Look for pub.tshers’ raitiale 08 every gentiog print, CURTIS & CaMEROS, Boston. Between New York and Chicago in 24 hours, bh vy Via New York Central—Lake Shore Route Vil comicbooks.com