Life — December 1, 1900 — page 42: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AMoNo the stories told. by the elo- quent and entertaining Colonel “Pat” Dyer on bis Republican campaigning tour throughout Mis- souri is the following, the point of which is obvious, Down in Boor County, Mo., several years ayo there lived @ noted character by the name of Van Bibber, Ie had some very strange theories, and one of them was that every thousand years his- tory repeated Itself, and that the things that happened one day in a thousand years from that day would happen again, Le preached this doctrine in season and oat of season, bat be could never make many cou- verta in his neighborhood. One evening about dusk threo travelers on horseback drew rein in front of his house and asked for accommo- dations for the night, which were reailily granted, Van Bibber being one of the most horpitable of men, After supper Van Biber com- menced to air his favorite theory. He told the men that one thousand y they would again ride up to bis humble dwell- ing and ask for shelter, and th they would be riding th horses that they now had. asked his guests what they thought of his doctrine, They informed him that they would have to eleep over It, as it was something entirely new tothem. The next morning about the firet question Van Bibber asked his guests was what they thought of his thousand year theory. The spokesman of the party eaid : *V believe you are right, and we VVVAEUVVEVEVTPYYVEVEVTVVYYVTEV TY ATOR, IGARETTES Indispensable to smokers of Discriminating Taste. LIEBIG COMPANY'S EXTRACT OF THE 4 Ww. OF BEEF. The HEALTH of the PRAIRIE brought to your door. ATT CO., MEW YORK. Decome coiverts to your way of thinking.” “L thought you would,” replied Van Bibber, rubbing his hands glee. “Now,” continued the speaker, “we have come a creat distance and we have mapy ‘ong, weary miles to traverse before we reach our destinatyon. To tell you the truth, Mr. Van Bibber, wo are short of money, and If it 1s just the same to you we will pay you for oar night's lodging when we te thousand years from now. “Let me sce," eaid Van Dibter, eying the three men very closely: “Lbelieve I recognize you, I thik you are the eame — rascals thst stopped here a thousand years azo and refused to pay. Your credits bad and I will collect now." — Kansas City Journal Sexaton Derew was rudely inter. rupted during his efforts to makes speech at Cobleskill early in the week ; but one of the retorts to bis remarks was clever enough to bear repetition. “Is there a man in this crowd who knows what 16 to 1 means!" asked the Senator, in an of c there-ie-not tone, “Yes,” was the prompt reply from an old son of Erin; ‘it means that you have sixteen dagos to was Irishman on your big New York Central Railroad.” The Senator gasped at the retor, while the crowd roared. Argonaut. comicbooks.com