Life — July 5, 1900 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“So Dewey 1s a Democrat." Df course. It takesa hero to be a Democrat nowadays.” — Bi COBWEB LIGHTNESS. No woman who values comfort can do without “ Arnold's Gauze Kit Drawers.” They welgh but four ounces. Fall cut, trimmed with umbrella lace or embroidery ruMe. Sold by Simpson, Crawford & Simpson. Waen the Queen, during a stay in Scotland, visited the Tay Bridge, one feature of the attendant ceremony was the presentation of a beautifal basket of Mowers. The Queen smiled as she took it In, but Dundee was not yet satisfled that It had done all tn its power. The Provost stepped forward with alow bow And, Your Majesty,” sald he, “ you need not return the basket." — London Outlook. “Thanks, dinner.” But It was so vile that he smoked tt while sitting on a front seat In the grip car on his way home. For what was he, that he should fly In the face of long-established custom? — Chicago Tritune. he sald, taking the cigar. “1 will amoke this afte HAVE IT IN YOUR HOUSE With telephone service you can reach everyone you want inn few seconds, It puts the whole organization of a great city at your Singers’ ends day and night, It may be had tn Manhattan for $60 year. New York Telephone Company, 111 West 38th 8t,, 16 Dey St AYTER the census man had jotted down the answers to the preceding questions, he asked Do you speak the Engitsh language? “Say,” replied the “ geut? who was under examination, | “what kind of a eplel ts thls you're uncorkin' on me, any way? Me speak the English language? Well, my boy, If you think I'm talkin’ Choctaw to you now you're np against one of the emptiest propositions that ever come down the pike. Say, if the man that invented the English language conld hear me splelon my larynx he'd holler for help, and that's no Josh nelther, You don't haft to have no translator to git my meantn’ into your headp! huh? Me talk Eugiish! if I'm trowin’ anything else nto you rite now you give me a’map of tt on a roller, will y —Chicaga Times-Herati. Are you sure this book ts too do you, THEATRICAL MANAGER ar rn: Ye “LT want to have but why are tt dramatized. —Subert’s Monthly Visiter. A PRRVECT drink, as wholesome ax It Is delictous, Cook's Impertal Champagne Extra Dry. It ts supertor. ou so particular? : Ian’t your mother In, Fi ma'am. She's down town. hopping?” “Oh, no, maamt! T don't think she hud time for that She sald she was just going to run down and get some things she needed." — Philadelphia Press. “Tie trouble about Nero, remarked Senator Sorghum, + was that the people around him didn’t know how to man: him. All that was needed was a little tact and diplom: “What would you have sug; 2 “Lwould atmply have got the capitalists: together and made arrangements to present Nero a block of stock In every insurance company in Rome, Then he wouldn't have had the heart to set fire to the town.” — Washington Star. HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON Accesalble location, excellent table prompt service. “Ir hag been figured out that If wil the money in the world were divided equally every person would get about thirty doliars."? “That's wrong. The mathematician who furnished those figures didn't know what he was taiking about. My wife would get aixty dollars.” — Chicago Timer. Herald. OSCAR’S | | SAUCE “As served at the Waldorf Astoria. For yachts, camps and sum mer cottage life. For hot and cold meats. s teaches by mal! with perfect success: Alois P. Swoboda ts cntca ce tiicmenod ot s Physiological Exercise without any apparatus whatever and requiring but a few minutes time in your own room just before retiring. By thix condensed system more exercise can be obtained in ten minutes than by any other In two hours aud It ts the only one which does not overtax the heart It ta the solr. natural, easy and speedy method for obtaining perfect health, physical development and elasticity of mind and body. ABSOLUTELY CURES CONSTIPATION, INDIGESTION, SLEEPLESSNESS, NERVOUS EXHAUSTION and revitalizes the whole body. Puplis are ot both sexes ringing tn age from fifteen to eighty-six, and all recommend the system. Since no two people are in the same physical condition individual instructions are given in each case. Write at once for full information and Booklet containing endorsements from many of America’s leading citizens to eM ALOIS P. SWOBODA, 34-36 Washington Street, CHICAGO, ILLS. Edoaard de Reszhe the morlds greatest Basso, urifes: FRANK Hvuntoon, EsqQ., . The White Rock Mineral Spring Company. Drar Sir: I have much pleasure in stating in this unsolicited testimonial, that I consider your White Rock water the very best table drink within my experience. I have constantly used it for s everal years, with the greatest benefit for the economy of the digestive organs and health in general, and I have recommended its use to all my friends. I rejoice to hear that the White Rock is obtainable now i ior dur shall certainly drink nothing else but your delicious Lithia. Tue Gi How: pril 24, 1900. New York, Paris at the Exhibition, and during my stay there I I'am dear sir, Yours sincerely, EDOUARD pr RESZKE. Four pints of White Rock will be sent anywhere in the United States, prepaid, upon receipt of $1.00. After drinking four pitts you will buy it regularly of your dealer, Booklet FRE! WHITE ROCK MINERAL SPRING COMPANY, ADIRONDACKS, WAWBEEK, Skaxsnc tase Open Juno to October. Pure Spring Drinking Water. INDIAN CARRY GOLF LINKS, For booklet address J. 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