Life — May 24, 1900 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Gormam: I suppose all of those portraits were handed down to you by your ancestors ? Wanasm: Ancestors nothing! They were handed down to me by the auctioneer !~ Yonkers Statesman, * We'll send you these circulars early to-morrow."* ‘Can't you print them and deliver them to day?” Guodness, yes; we'll send them to you yesterday if you eay #0."—Chteago Record, YOUNG MEN OF GOOD SOCIAL POSITION, Residing in New York and vicinity, whose Incomes have been reduced through causes beyond their control, may learn of method of making reasonable return without sacrifice of time or interference with business or soctal inclinations and in a manner beyond social criticism, No capital or obligation required, - The pian 1s not ® “Snanctal scheme" or one to which condition tndlvi . teaches by mal! with perfect Alois P. Swoboda #2 icmntteancisticaciy e Phystologteal Exercise without apparatus whatever and requiring bot a few minutes time in your own ne jist before retiring. ‘By this condensed ayatem more exercine can be in ten minutes than by any other tn two hours aud it ts the only one Thy, does not overtax the heart. It ta the on! fieaith, physical de ABSOLUTELY CURES CONSTIPATION, INDIGESTION, SLEEPLESSNESS, NERVOUS EXHAUSTION and revitalizes the whole body. yPuplls are of both sexes ranging in age from fifteen to elghty-stx. aatg Feermimend tho system. Since no two people are tn the same pipe dual Instrictions are given in Write at once for full information and Booklet contatning endonena from many of America’s leading citizens to ALOIS P. SWOBODA, 34-36 Washington Street, CHICAGO, IL Ci natural, easy and speedy method for obtaint velopment and elasticity of mind and body, "® Pete: each case. exception should be taken, Address C. M. J., care LIVE PUBLISHING Co,, 19 West Sist Street, New York, raid the up-todate king, I mean todo away with some of this flummery.”* “But, your majesty,” protested the arbiter elegantiaram, “you must have pages to hold yoar train, ‘Tell me, 18 that not more dignified than to have the royal train sweeping along the floor? ** can draw my own conclusion —Philadelphia Press, “The boss is goin’ to give a dinner to some of the boys,” eaid the emall politician. “1 got an invite this mornin’, and on the bottom of it was printed *R. 8, V. P.? What docs that mean?" I wonder,” mused the ward worker, ‘Maybe ‘V. P." stands for * Vice-Preeidet bc +0, I nee it now,” cried the other. “Roosevelt Sure for Vice-President.""— Philadelphia Press, HAVE IT IN YOUR HOUSE. 1 With telephone service you can reach everyone you want ina few seconds, It puts the whole organization of a great city at your fingers’ ends day and night. It may Le had tn Manhattan for $608 year. New York Telephone Company, 111 West 38th St,, 15 Dey St. “L eappore you have learned some valuable lessons from the United States recently,” said the stranger, “Yee,” answered the Porto Rican, “the only trouble ts that we can't find any islands littler than ours to play the same trick on.""— fFashington Star, At the Battle of Trafalgar, a sailor found kneeling by his gun, as his ehip was about to engage the enemy, was asked by the first lieutenant if he was afraid. Afraid!” answered Jack, with an expression of the utmost disdain ; “no, your honor; I'm only praying that the enemy's shot may be distributed like the prize money— the greatest part among the officers.""— Argonaut, HOTEL VENDOME, BOSTON. All the attractions of hotel life, with the comforts and privacy of home. On April 18, 2001, the Britieh war office received the cheering news: ‘Her Majesty's troops in South Africa are now con- centrating for the siege of Pretoria.” ‘That same day the War Department at Washington received a revised list of the week's killed and wounded in the Philippines, —Philadelphia North American. ‘Ax Irish officer addressing his men, who had just returned from a comewhat fruitless expedition, said, * You were no doubt disappointed because this campaign gave you no oppor- tunity to fight; but if there had been any fighting there would have been many absent faces here to-day 1" — Tit. Bits, Boy {t and try it if you want @ delicious wine with @ beautiful bouquet — Cook's Imperial Extra Dry Champagne, Yxs, the cannibal well recalled the day their last mls- sionary bat one had come among them, ** On the occasion of the first services he held here, ex- claimed the elmple savage, not without evidences of emotion, “there wasn't a dry mouth in the congregation !"* ‘There was no member of the tribe, unless perchance he had been dieting at the time, who did not remember this mis- The Improved BOSTON GARTER The Standard for Gentlemen ALWAYS EASY CARTER Is stamped " Issi BKon every ee The j CUSHION BUTTON «_CLASP Lies flat to the leg—never Slips, Tears nor Unfastens, SOLD EVERYWHERE. Sample peir, Silk Se. > Cltton Be. Be stalled on receipt of price. GEO. FROST 0O., Makers ‘Boston, Mass.,'U.8.A, BSS EVERY PAIR WARRANTED-S The Putman Boots Are practical Sportsmen's Footwear, We have for 23 years Bup- plied Western Hunters, Prospector, Ranchmen and Engineers (who demand the best), and have learned through our personal ‘contact with them to make a perfect boot. Send for catalogue of o nt style: ned Moose Hide Moc: ‘This cut shows our No. 678, 16 inch Root. Uppers are Special Chrome Tanned Calf Skin. ‘Tanned with the grain of the hide left on (our special tannage), making the leather water proet. Large eyelets and wide leather laces. at side to fit tight around the top. Sol genuine hand sewed, (making it soft and easy. Made to measure and delivered Rou Be! $7.50 Send for blank showing how to ees art H. J. PUTMAN & CO, “saccr* Minneapolls, Ml ‘Woe publish two books, The tities aro Colorado California There aro two kinds of books, One-the cheap sort, exaggerated Instateraent, poorly done, given away by tho thousand. ‘Tho other—of Iterary excellence, informative, beautifully filus- trated, printed by experts on fine paper; a work of art. Our books are of the second kind. Cultivated people like thera. Price 6c each; postage stamps ‘will do. Frill 70a pend for them to joneral Passenger Agent, jeneral Passenger Agen! B&Q BR, Chicago, Tl, RAL? OUCH & @ FitzGeE 161 BROADWAY. 688 BROADWAY. 723 SIXTH AVENUE. sionary.—Detroit Journal, «IT’S ALL IN THE LENS.” The most popular Camera of the day fs the Lo Fort, KORONA Series Vi ** Not cheap, but good.” During the past few months the orders fer this Camera havo {ncreased greatly. It 47 pealsto both the amateur and skilled phot rapher, and {s worthy of examination by ‘wno care for this most interesting art. It has a Double-SIidiag Front He Ler Back te Quickly Reversible ror r : and. Instantaney@ Write for Catalogue and full particulart. GUNDLACH OPTICAL CO., Rochester, N.Y “Not in the Trust.” | TIsERES 3 zereee tHE a Be a 4 of Point Ar, Robes Figu Ladiey Ficht y Fea