Life — March 15, 1900 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Success. JIAT is success 7 Reward of toil; sweet recompense for stress— Compelling homage for a Titan soul ?— Enlivening mirage as you gusping press On to the promise of a phantom goal? I will contess— So L believed—through reading it was 60 In my school reader vanished years ago ;— But, baving tried it—gotting nothingness— I gucas— Success is nothing moro nor Ieas—than Just—succoss! Olin L. Lyman, Our Little War. Bat information from the Philip- pines leads us to suppose that the wings of glory are still unfurled. That is, the war isstill on. A certain number of the natives are being despatched every day, and the sercam of the American The Ply to His Rest Girt; TAKE YOUN MRAD O¥P MY SHOULDER, DEAR—UERE COMYS ONE OF THOSE CAMERA FIEND, Eagle, while hollow, is, nevertheless, distinctly audible, Uncle Sam is appearing to the best ad- By Joaquin Miller, eens of Choate reminds me of a dinner we had here in New York about twenty-five years ago, when he told the best story I ever listened to. I've forgotten it, but it was admirable. The occasion was the great fish dinner of the year, but I don’t like fish, I prefer bear meat and moose, ‘There were about three hundred guests, including R. B. Roosevelt, and Choate and Depew, and when those men got up to talk, the fish had longer tails than I'd ever dreamed of. I saw that I should have to give them the hard frozen truth, and I did—only they wouldn't believe it. I distinctly remember that the more seri- ous I was, the harder Choate laughed. On my. father’s farm in Oregon, the fish were so troublesome that my father was obliged to build a fence fifteen feet high, to keep them out of the pasture, where they were destroying the grass, That is the cold frozen truth. The fish would come up the river in great quan- titics, so that horses were afraid to wade through thecrossings for fear of slipping onthemand falling, Butit was when they would leave the river and try to force their way up the small brooks that they trampled down the grass, A big old salmon would hook his nose over the root of a tree and work his way up the brook and the others would follow him. The female would lay her eggs up there, and the fish would flop into the pasture, flop- ping farther and farther in their efforts to get back to the water. They would flop as much as fifty fect into the pasture, and die on the grass; then the cattle wouldn't eat the grass, Well, you know the men at that dinner said that that was the fishiest fish story they’d ever heard, and all the time it was the hard frozen truth, vantage. Asa benevolent gentleman, of pacific and civilizing proclivities, he has never been so luminous, An Important Question ! \ HICH is the meanest city in the United States? This is an important question, and one that Lire would like to have defi- nitely settled. With that object in view, we offer A. Prize of Fifty Dollars in Gold for the best statement of facts which prove: that any particular city is the meanest one in this country. Conditions. Competitors must limit thelr arguments to three hundred words each Write on one side of the paper onty. ‘The contest will close May Ist, 1900, and the award will be made 4s soon thereafter us the respective merits of the arguments can be determined, ‘The winning argument will be printed, together with such others as may seem to Lire worthy of that distinguished honor, Names and addresses of the writers should accompany all manuscripts, In no case will these be printed without the permtsston of the sender, Those who desire thelr manuscripts