Life — February 22, 1900 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

154 As It Is Taught the Filipinos. E merits most Who grabbeth most All lands, both reat and sinall: For the y grab and rule o'er all, great men who rule o'er us, HE DAUGHTER: But, papa, he says he cannot live without me. Para (dryiy): I guess he's right, DITOR LIFE. Dean Mu, Eprror: You have an lent opportunity, in your dash for liberty, to stop the bloodshed in South Africa and rel »ppressed British Send a few good prospectors to or “salt,” a gold mine or two to the seaward of Froro; and if the British army does not disband in three days, wo aro all very much mistaken as to their purpose in South Afrien, Yours, Newron HicHLanps, Mass, Deacon, Live: Please take my whispered folicita- tions, Yourarticly “ As to the Philippines” is the funniest thing I've seen in forty— yes, in forty-flve years, You're a very Princo of Satirists, And the closing para- graph (sa capital climax. But do you not foar that it fs just a little—the slightest shade, you know —too, too, a, suggestive of plagiarism ? It has boen substantially reit- erated #0 many times by a Mr. McKinley; and several times by a Mister Denby, and a. Mister Barrett, and a Professor Schurman, and by Generals Merritt (Dy Merritt) avd Otis, and all the swag-fevered gang of Benevolent Assimilators, that I'm afraid didn’t take enough trouble to disguise it, Bat then, verbiago often buries a Goak ; and you havo dono this up so neatly that I ought not complain, if the *too-good-a- thing-to-le%-go” pooplo are satisfed. Yours truly, Joun SuitTH. Dear Lire: Just as the decent theatre- goors of New York were congratulating themselves on tho disappearance of the “tainted woman” from the stage this fall, and the number of clean and successful plays that have been produced, th threatened with another flood of ith in the appearance of the notorious Mrs, Langtry io “Tho Degenerates,” and Miss Olga Net! wle in the notorious ‘Sapho,” Lire bas always been such a champion of the decent in the drama that it would be a waste of its space for me to attempt to ‘LIFE: moralize on this theme. There is one point in connection with it, however, that I wish Lire would to&ch upon, That is the support that this kind of play receives from the women, I do not mean only the women of our “best society” (which is often another name for our worst), but the mothers and daughters of quict, respectable homes, who “shine” more often in the work of the church than in the life of “society.” The erowds of this class of women who pour out of the mati- nees of plays of the Zaza type is most surprising. A united effort on the part of the decent women of New York to boycott plays of this deseription would effectually banish them from tho stage, But no such offort is made. Curiosity and tho love of the morbid sooms to draw them likon magnet. As longas this is the case, and there is monoy in it, these plays will continue to be pro- duced, The public, also, will have the edifying spectacle of Mr, Charles Frohman as he presents Miss Maude Adams, in “The Little Minister,” as “tho triumph of purity in theatricals,” on the one hand, aud Mrs, Langtry in the triumph of impuri- ty, Tho Degenerates," on the other, * You pays your money, and you takes your choice.” See | E. H. 8. No Comparison. ‘«°T-HE Boer war scems to hare eclipsed entirely our fight with the Philippines. “And why not? South Africa has much more money in it.” IVERS of the temperance reformers are taking trouble to upset the conclusions lately reached after careful and protracted experiment by Professor Atwater of Wesleyan University, that alcohol is a food and nota poison. The conclusion is scientific, and is of no moral significance, since Professor At- water does not deny that alcohol, though a food, is a mighty dangerous one. The reformers dislike the professor's finding THOSE SHARP SHOOTING PAINS, because it is contrary ‘to statements in most of the text-books on the effects of rum which they have succeeded in com- pelling the public school children to study. The professor is a chemist of ex- cellent standing, and if he says that alcohol, chemically considered, is a food, the presumption js that he is right. What the reformers ought to co is to spare themselves pains in controverting Drofessor Atwater, and amend their text-books, substituting for a lot of disputed physiological as- sertions that half the doctors deny, a little plain and truthful writing about the use and dangers of rum which children could understand. comicbooks.com