Life — April 6, 1899 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| | | ‘Tue girl arrived at a friend's house, flushed and exhila- rated. “Do I look any the worse for wear?” said she; “snch @ Cay! Got in town this morning, and lunched with a man at the Sacurin. Atways been dying to go there, and I never Junched alone with a man before in my life. Wouldn't mamma have spasms {f she knew! J shook my man after lunch, took a hansom up to the Astoria, where I telephoned six different men to come there to see ne, Been holding a | reception, one at a time, you know, Told the first man to meet me at 2:15 In the Moorish Room and the next at 2.45 ta the palm-garden, and 1 fixed the time and the place +0 cleverly that not one of them knew the other had been there. Each thought himself the only one, and I told them all 1 couldn't give them hut balf an hour, because I was on the fy and you Were waiting for me up here, That was time enough to give any man and to drink a cocktall, Had one with each | as he came along—I had to be soctable, you know, and of | course I couldn't exptatn that I'd had one before. One before luncheon and six at the Astoria—lucky I had a different waiter every time, wasn't it? Imanaged that. Seven at a stretch breaks my record, and I haven't turned @ batr.” —New York Press, | A CASE was recently being tried in one of the depart- | ments of the Superior Court. “1 would like to ask, your Honor, that this case go over until to-morrow," sal” one of the attorney “On what ground?" sald the Judge. “Too tired #” «Yes, your Honor, [have heen arguing a case all day in Departinent Two, and Iam really too fatigued to go on with this trtal. “Very well, let the case go over. Call the next case The next case was called and another attorney arc } “May It please your Honor, I would ltke to ask that this case go ver." For sale by all Newsdealers in Great Isrttain. national News Company, Bream’ London, E. C., England, AGENTS. ‘The Inter- Building, Chancery Lane, “ For what reason?” “Tam too tired." “You, too? What makes you tired?” “Thave been stenting all day to my learned friend in Department Two."—argovant, A pretty saying of an army officer Is reported by an exchange. He marrted, tn 1865, the daughter of a man whose whole heart was in the cause of the Southern negroes. The mar. riage has been a very happy one. “Were you so much Interested tn the slavery question when Lknew yout” asked acollege friend, who bad not seen the officer for thirty years. “Yes, but T didn’t talk much about tt, was the reply. “That after [ met my wife's father, I became a strong aboll- tontst, and very soon after { met her I became a slave.” — Youth's Companion, ‘Two Lapres visiting in Washington recently went to the Capitol o hear the proceedings in the United States Senate, Most of the galleries being filled, they approached the door- keeper of the Senators ga tery, where aimission Is by card. As they did not possess this passport, the doorkeeper sug- gested that they procure one from any Senator they night be aacquaioted with, + Tat we dom “Well, It Is very much to keeper. “Pass right tn, ladies. know any Senator.” they replied. our eredit,” sald the door- —Argonant, + Ile comes not !"? she faltered, wringing her hands. ‘The hour of tryst was long past. “He will never come!" erled the distracted gir, “ut, happily, know a neat song and dance which will perhaps enable me toearn my living. Let her go, professor’ The audience thundered applanse, appreciating at once the exquisite art with which the specialty had been Iuterpo lated In the melodrama.—Detroit Journal. My litte mald told me the other afternoon that she wished to get off early, ns she was going to the theatre, Next morning Lasked her what play she saw. Madame Fse-Fye,” she sald, “I'm told that's @ very immoral play,” I remarked. « Yes, indeed it ts, ma'am,” she sald ; “it's elegant” —Dramatic Mirror “Good eve. Ir was the shank of the evening In Bertin. ning, Herr Police OMicer,” sald the citizen, + Come with me,” was the pollceman’s answer. “Donner-wetter! Was ist los?” asked the astonished ctttzen. * You that it is evening assumed have, when the emperor not dined has yet already."—Jud wrt poles Journal. “TALKING of patriotism,” sald asbury Peppers, «the South furntshes the only genulne articie.” What?” shouted the boarder from Connecticut. “Fact. Think of the clay-eaters down in Georg! think of how they Itke (heir native soll. —Cincinnath Engutrer. - Just Rector’s DavanteR: Ob, Lady Horton, we have started & hockey club, 1 do wish you would allow Cora to fotn, Lapy Hoos: How enterprising! And do you play a mixed team? “Oh, bo; not at all. people."—Erchan e. “TL wonper why It ts so rare for a man to marry bis first Tassure you they are all very alce lov * Generally because a woman of thirty-five has too much sense to marry @ kid of elghteen."—/udianapolis Journal, Established 1823. 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