Life — March 23, 1899 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

235 At the Bookstall. «€PDOETS REDUCED TO FIFTY CENTS!” Why, no! Yot so 'tis written on the shaimeless card. Yo wonder-spinning gentry, it is hard That your poor fortunes are 80 bittor low. Frank Villon, Bobbio Burns and Kit Marlowe, And many another blitheand bungry bard, Wore cobbled hose, and cloak and jerkin marred By envious Fortune's sharp and cruel blow. But now, when everywhere the strumpet loads On dull, fat wit in pork or oil or wheat A pyramid of golden shining pence, Trundles hor wheel along on iron roads, It is. a shame that they who sing so aweot Should bo reduced to only fifty cents. 0. E. 8. Wood, Imaginary Conversation. “ W AR is a great undertaking.” sighed Alger. “Well, you ran it like a great undertaker,” said Miles. @ra is the mother of abstention. an) ey 4 hay 5. > LY; = iL pe ZL”) wy eo Ah ee. 2 “ CHARLES, DEAR, AW'N'T YOU GOING IX THE WROXG DIRECTION FOR VIOLETS?" Our Genial. cts R. PRESIDENT,” said the Judge Advocate, ‘‘ we have found this man guilty of insubordi nation, and conduct unbecoming a — gentleman and an officer. He isa sneak and a coward, What shall we do with him?” ‘* Give me time,” said the President; “Tl see about it, But I'll say this: Isha’o’t increase his pay more than fifty per cent.” An Outward Sign. “ HY, this monument is crooked.” ** Yes; so was the deceased.” « HEN the Philippines are really ours, what will we do with them?” Cuees TERM: “ eTaLE Mare.” “« Keep on recapturing them.” * BURNT CORK.