Life — December 22, 1898 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

| Ata recent Bombay school board examination, one of the tasks was an essay on boys, and this was one of the compost- tions Just as it was handed tn by a girl of twelve: ‘The boy Is not an animal, yet they can be heard toa considerable distance. When a boy hollers he opens his big mouth like frogs, but girls hold their tongue till they are spoken to, and then they answer respectable, and tell Just how it was. A boy thinks himself clever because he can wade where it 1s deep, but God made the dry land for every living thing, and rested on the seventh day. When the boy grows up he ts called @ husband, and then he stops wading And stays out at night, but the grew-up girl Is a widow and Keeps house."— Pittsburg Bulletin. Surru and Jones were talking one day about their bust- ness Interests. Smith was a hotel man and Jones was a manufacturers’ agent. “T say," sald Jones, “however do you use such an enormous quanulty of pears and peaches?” “Well,” replied Smith, “ we eat what we can, and what we can’t eat we can.” * Indeed 1" sald the other; our busine: * How ts that? “We sell an order when we can sell tt, can t sell It we cancel it."—Ezchange. we do about the same tn nd when we AN enthusiastic Professor had been advocating the advan- tages of athletic exercise. “The Loman youths," b a, “used to swim three times across the Tiber before break: fast. ‘The Scotch student smiled, at which the irate Professor exclatmed, “Mr. McAllister, why do you smile? We shall be ‘The canny Scot replied: “I was just thinking, sir, that the Roman youths must have left thelr clothes on the wrong, bank at the end of their swim.”—The Bookman, ‘Tue editor of the Clarion was a very patient man. A startling crash from the direction of the composing-room caused him to push his spectacles up on his brow and c writing. When he found that the boy had let the first. form fall on the foor, where it lay In an incoherent mass, he shook his head reproachfully, and exclaimed: “Lemuel, | do wish that you could manage to break the news more gently."— Exchange. Tur master was coldly critical. ‘ou can paint minor details,” he observed, * For in- stance, the sunshine, the sky, the mountains, the ocean, the earth, all these figures of men and women are exquisitely done, But your signature! Bah! How crude! How lackiog in di How faulty in perspective!”? As for the disciple, he could but cast his palette upon the floor and weep aloud in his chagrin.—Detroit Journal, “Am I the first girl you ever loved?” she asked him, more as a matter of habtt thau anything else, “LT cannot tell a ile," sald he,“ Youzare not. simply the best of the bunch." Betog a modern maid, she was content with that. Cincinnati Enquirer, You are “Te seems to prize his fancée highly,” sald the first sweet thing. “Naturally,” replied the other sweet thing. hand-painted, you know.” Of course there was no Jealousy In the case; certatnly “She's glad to share your amusement.” For salo by national News Cc + England, AGENTS. Stern Bros direct attention to Recent Importations of the very latest Parisian Models in their celebrated Classique Corsets specially adapted to the present mode of costume and In a variety of choice and exclusive materials West 23d St. 1 Newsdeaters in Great firitain. The Inter- pany. Hream's Building, Chancery Lane, not —Chicago Post. HARPER AND BROTHERS: NEW YORK AND LONDON. Ai Angelina Web. By Julian ftatph, The New God, By Richard Voss, Peeps at People. By John Kendrick Bangs. JOUN LANE: NEW YORK 4ND LONDON. Sun, Moon and Stars. By E. Rucharason, Mlustrated. Dream Days, By Kenneth Grahame. CHARLES SCRIBNER'S SONS: NEW YORK. Music and Forty. By Sidney Lanter. Rembrandt. By Waiter Cranston Larned. Illustrated, Miss America, By Alexander Black. Miustrated DODD, MEAD AND COMPANY: NEW YORK. Aylin, By Theodore Watts-Dunton, In the Forest of arcen. By Mamtiton Wright Mable, Decorated by Will II. Low, G. P. PUTNAM'S SONS: NEW YORK. Catering for Tico. By Alice L. James. TUE CESTURY COMPANY: NEW YORE. Out of Mulberry Street. By Jacob Ris. LAMSON, WOLPPE AND COMPANY, BOSTON, NEW YORE AND LONDON. Songs of Good Fighting. By Eugene R. White. E.R. MERRICK AND COMPANY: NEW YORK. AS Told by the Typewcriter Girt, By Mabel Clare Ervin. Tent of the Plains. By Shannon Birch. The Little Lady, Some Other People and Myselt. Tom Hall. Pictures by Granvitte Smith. Colored Ithustrations, Pictures by T. de Thulstrup and Others. Colored Ilus- trations. Pictures by Charles Howard Johnson and others. Colored Illustrations. by EUROPEAN AGENTS—Messrs. Brentany, venue de l'Oper \ Registered Trade Mark, Holly and Mistletoe in Table Linen. An entirely new design, ordered espe- cially for this season and just now to hand, to cloths and napkins of all sizes. Sprays! land Sprigs of the Holly and Mistletoo in- |termingled and tastefully arranged, form the design which, in accordance with the| latest style, has both table and hanging] borders. The quality of the goods is fine,| but not expensive; two by two yard cloths| lare $4.50 each, Dinner Napkins $6.50 per| dozen, other sizes in both at proportionate) prices, “THE LINEN STORE.” James McCutcheon & Co, 14 West 23d Street, New York. Have You Read “Aylwin,” the . THE. EMPRESS KAISERIN Was especially de- signed to give music lovers all that could be desired, and the statement that Her Majesty, The Kais- FREDERICK — erin. Frederick, of Prussia, has one of ORGAN our style 431 organs, is sufficient to estab: lish its superiority. The pathos and power of a voice may be materially injured by an instrument that is incapable of rende ing sympa. thetic response. That is why Mr. Sanxey uses this Mason & Hamlin Organ, Remarkable New Romance? By Theo. Watts-Dunton. Price, $1.50. At all Bookstores, Dodd, Mead & Co., Publishers, N. Y. Is designed to meet pular demand at as ow a price as an in- strument can iy Sear not quite the height of SANKEY MODELS Sencar tween the player and his audience. ‘Our ORGAN CATALOGUE gives full particulars about ** THE SANKEY " and & score of other models. Mason®-Beaulin Co. Boston, New York AND CHICAGO Intending purchasers should tend, Piano Catalogus deseriting our New Seale Pianoe THE [431]