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Tar appointment of Mr. Curzon to be Viceroy of India Tecalls a story told of him when he was Under-Secretary for the Colonies. He was once making a long and etatorate speech tn Parilament aguinst a measure urged regarding India, It was certain to result tn a loss to the government of many lacs of rupees. He repeated with emphasis: “Con- sider; not pounds nor guineas, but lacs of rupees !"* ‘A quiet voice on the Opposition benches asked: “ Exactly how much ts @ lac of rupees?” Mr. Curzon opened bis mouth, stammered, grew red, and then sald: I really don’t know 1" The House laughed, and tn that laugh he lost his cause. Exchange. POINTS ABOUT TELEPHONE SERVICE. Telephone subscribers in New York have the use of the best equipped telephone system in the world. Every station has a long distance telephone set and 1s connected to the Central Office by a direct metallic ctreult under- ground line. The rates vary with the amount of use. In private residences and stables the use of the service is not great, and consequently the cost {s small, but the con- venlence is !mmeasurable. The telephone service puts the whole organization of a great city at your Angers’ ends day and night. In bis wife's employ was an Irtsh servant, who one day asked leave to attend the “ wake" of a favorit in, The desired permission was granted, and Norah graced the melancholy feast, clad in her Sunday best. A few weeks later she announced to her mistress that she must leave her within a month, “Are you dissatisfied with your work or your wages, Noratir" asked the minister's wife, taken by surprise, and sorry to lose w falthful servant, “0h, no, mem” sald Norah, quickly; ** tut 'm golng to be merried to my cousin's widower.” * Isn't It rather sudden, Norah? * asked the mistress, “Iv kind of suddint to me, mem," sald Norah, twisting the corners of her apron, “but ‘taint to him, He says 1 was the life of the wake, mem, and he marked me whilst be was mourntng.""— Youth's Companion, A GIFT OF UTILITY. If you want a seasonable as well as a useful Christinas gift, secure a Waterman's Ideal ntain Pel It combines: three first-class qualities—conventence comfortand economy, Styles, sizes and prices to meet every requirement. Dealers, Tisxissy, th’ Dimmycratic party 1s not doomed to victhry. “Lis @ good critic but a bud actor, ‘Tis gr'reat to stand In the pit an’ heave eggs at McDutt in th’ play tv * Mo- Beth's Firtation,’ but whtn It gets on th’ stage it thrips over {ts soord an’ f'rgets what It Intinded to say, an’ dnally ends be peggin’ th’ stage manager {nto th* bass dhrum. Itniver gets ‘an oncoore.""—" Douley," in Chicago Evening Journal, HOTEL VENCOME, BOSTON, Commonwealth Avenue Electric Lights, New and most ‘approved plumbing. Hix: Why did you full to recognize me on the street Every Drop is Perfectly Pure. Every Drop Cleanses the Mouth, Every Drop Polishes the Teeth. Every Hardens the Gums, Every is Free from Grit. Every is a Fragrant Breath. Every Drop is Delicious and Harmless, Popular price, 25 cents. Send 2-cent etamp for sample val. EW. Horr & Co., Lowell, Mass, SHAVING ¢ STICK AB Williams’ Seaps s0ld everywhere, but sent by mail ¢ Jour dealer dees mot supply you, Williams’ Shaving Stick, 25 cts. Genuine Yankee Shaving Soap, 10 cts. Luxury Shaving Tablet, 25 cts. Swiss Violet Shaving Cream, 50 cts. Jersey Cream (Toilet) Soap, 15 cts. Williams’ Shaving Soap :narhers, 6 Round Cates, ! Absence from Home 1s no reason why we should undergo discomfort and inconvenience. On the other hand, absence from home should be the synonym for greater com- fort and convenience, and it should be our endeavor to have the best to be bad to repay us for the absence of home and fends. ‘This is assured to patrons of 6 Lehigh Valley Railroad where every want ts anticipated and every craving provided for in order to give passengers that Ease, Comfort Luxury and Cheerfulness to be found in the happiest home. Superb train service, magnificent equipment, bountiful meals en route, everything to make the passenger feel at home and fully at ease, Profusely {ilustrated Iiteramre matled on receipt of four cents In stamps, Address Chas. S, Lee, General Pussen- ger Agent, New York. \ BEEMAN’S THE ORIGINAL }PEPSIN , GUM Cures Indigestior and Sensieksfoa All Others aro Initattece, HAMILTON HOTEL HAMILTON, BERMUDA. OPEN DECEMBER UNTIL MAY. Electric lights and all {mprovements, MEAD & BROOKS, Managers. New York Office, 3 Park Place. 1b. 4oc, Exquisite let, Trial Cake for ac, stamp, THE J.B.WILLIAMS CO., r Lompon, GLASTONBURY, CONN, SiomeX, G4 CREAT RUSSELL ST. W.C. HL CLARENCE ST. Sur: T didn't see you. “That's strange. I saw you twice." “Ob, that probably accounts for it, I never noticeaman in that condition."— Chicago News, FOOD FOR INFANTS. ‘The Gall Borden Eagle Brand Condensed Milk, as a baby food from the hour of birth, stands without a competitor, pre- senting as It does the most perfect preparation of milk for the tuse of infants, WATER ix is distilled water. Nothing but distillation will eliminate both organic and inorganic im- purities. An ordinary cook- stove is all you need with THE SANITARY STILL to give you plenty of pure, sparkling water, aerated with sterilized air, Free booklet. Our $10.00 STILL has twice the capacity of others. Write at once for particulars. URE 700 kinds—jo,000,000 made yearly. DIXON'S AMERICAN CRAPHITE PENCILS JOSEPH DIXON CRUCIBLE C0., Jersey City, N. J. CURMAN Was defeated in @ conversational contest with Lady Morgan, the Irish novelist, one evening tn that lady's drawing room. Exaggerating the prevailing fashion tn short sleeves, she was merely Wearing straps over her shoulders, Curran was watking away from the little party when Lady THE =a, Morgan called out, “An, come tack, Mr. Curran, and CU PIGR APH COMPANY 189 north droentti thier acknowledge that you are fairly beates A FF aa 66 eh A 0 6 RR FO RE 66 FY EO 9 cm 6 8 me 46 em “solation, Lady Morgan, that you can’t laugh at me in your sleeve." Exchange. ] sense Produce each @ i bil cox vorwann arti ! Celey Alcohol, Hirai cer - isease y! iy Praeger terse 4 Prepares for her the delicate perfumed liven. * What essence rn te Pate, at Yay will Madame te Comtesse prefer in her bath?" “A useless ] ure To Bcc Racor 8 Ba a question, my good girl; are you not aware that I only use the . fat Write for pardenlare te for partienlars. [eee On “ At any rate,” said he, turning around, “I have this con- E WH IT E PLAI N s N Y 9 Mode ‘The lovely Countess 1s aboat to take her bath, andin the the Doable Caloriée of Gold Violettes du Czar, the delicious pertame of Oriza-Legrand?” Us: ng # .