Life, 1898-09-22 · page 20 of 20
Life — September 22, 1898 — page 20: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a satirical cartoon titled "If We Had Only Retained Elizabethan Idioms." It mocks how affected and overwrought dialogue becomes when rendered in archaic Shakespearean English. Two characters—labeled "Reduced Comedian" and "Reduced Tragedian"—attempt casual conversation about drinking beer, but their simple desire comes across as grandiose and ridiculous when expressed through elaborate period language ("arrant knave," "parched throat," "cannikin," "beshrew my hand"). The joke targets contemporary theater performers and the fashion for affected, over-theatrical speech. By showing how ludicrous everyday chat sounds in Elizabethan dialect, Life satirizes those who adopt pretentious speech patterns or excessive dramatics in modern contexts. The rest of the page consists of vintage advertisements for Vin Mariani tonic, White Rose soap, Whitman's chocolates, Old Crow whiskey, and other period products—typical filler for early 20th-century magazines.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
= September 22, 15% IF WE HAD ONLY RETAINED ELIZABETHAN IDIOMS. Ist Reduced Comedian: GOOD DEN, BROTHER SWIPES, GOOD DEN. 1 AM AN ARRANT KNAVE IP IT BE LESS THAN A SEVEN-NIGHT SINCE I HAVE MOISTENED MY PARCHED THROAT WITH A TASTE OP BEER; COME, LET SOR- ROW WAG, AND LET ME COOL MY TEETH AGAINST THY CANNIKIN. Reduced Tragedian : MARRY AN’ BESHREW MY HAND, BUT THY WIT 18 FORCIBLE, AND YOU DESERVE WELL FROM ME, NEIGHBOR LACY. TO HAVE A DRINKING BOUT WITH THEE WOULD WELL BECOME ME. “Whitman’s ? 6| Ev jece a delicacy, done up in § hy teinpuing style. Ask for them. \ ‘WHITMAN'S i INSTANTANEOUS CHOCOLATE f fect in flavor and quality, P Ite ous and healthful, Made in Headache 97 3) Tho Ideal French Tonic FOR BODY AND BRAIN Since 1969, Endorsed by Medical Paculty lasting _ efficacious maaniant win The Edition de Luxe of Whi has a reputation, and is, in fact, the finest goods in the market, It has the call over all others. We refer to that well known _ thoroughbred, the Old Crow Rye Buy only of reliable [4 houses, thus avoiding } |B imitations. All really fine goods are countef feited. H.B. KIRK & CO. Established 1953. immediate agreeable placed it at the apex of all. SOLD ONIVERAALLY, "AMPLE CAKE 18 CENTS. MULHENS @ KR pet 69 Fulton St., also B'way & 27th St. N.Y, Agents for the Great Western Champagnes.