Life — November 18, 1897 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Y DEAR OLp Mato: is is strictly private, and no one need know that Lam addressing you in particular except your own dear self, and it is more than probable that you will not tell. fun of by the youth and flippant folk of your generation, and while you are never addressed in public by your title, you are fuily aware that it exists, and that it is applied to you with great frequency when you do not happen to be present. It has made you sensitive, and while you would be the last person to admit that your state of life is not by all odds the best, at the same time, because of the general criticism which your single blessedness calls forth from all, you are always ready to take arms for yourself. No one knows better of the opportunities that have strewn your path, and because you have refused them all, and prefer to be what you are, is, you think, an evidence of true great- ness. No woman was ever so homely or ill-favored that some man did not want to marry her, and as for you—why you, my dear lady, are positively beau- tiful. It is true that there is the least possible suggestion of coming wrinkles, and the faintest gleam of white in your hair, but the bloom isstill on your cheek, the quiet twinkle in your cye, and your features are fine and regular. I am sure, therefore, that should you make the least possible effort, or place ‘your- self where the effort could come from the other side, there would be, in your case, not the slightest difficulty. More- over, I advise you to do it. It is true that there are certain ad- vantages about your present condition that are worth thinking of, but, believe me, the disadvantages on the other side are not nearly so great as you imagine. All husbands do -not live at their clubs, or come home at three o'clock in the morning, like Indians on the warpath, in a state of beastly intoxication. They do not scream or swear at the sight of You have been made more or less the bills the postman is in the habit of delivering, but pay them like men, and if there be anything left in the bank at the end of the month, cheerfully give it up to your other pressing needs. It is true that they have a habit of smoking around the house, and are somewhat obdurate on the subject of church-going. They may disarrange things slightly and expostulate mildly when the coffee is weak, but, aside from these trifling pecu- liarities, you will find them a meek, hardworking class, easily wheedled and ready to do as they are told—that is, provided they are not “told,” but ‘man- aged.” Try one and sce. Believe me, itis not yet too late. Lire. The Mark of Cain. Hall $ MARK. Caine Dreyfus. pews of the guilt of Captain Dreyfus is becoming epidemic in France. There are men who claim to be able to prove his innocence as soon as General Somebody dies. nd men of stand- him to have There are other: ing, who believe been the victim of a plot. Let him be thankful that the crime of convicting him, if it is a crime, is the exclusive prop- erty of France, and that there is no ob- ligation upon any American to agitate brick is that she is to be pardoned. Captain Dreyfus is confined on a small island off the coast of French Guiana, What does anyone surmise might happen if Editor Hearst should become interested in his case? The Isle du Diable has only a few guards on it, and Editor Hearst is a very practical man. An Expert. ILLIE SLIMSON: Papa, how are matches made ? Stimson: You'd better ask your mother, At Home. LD fireside, I'm thine to-night, Let snapping logs burn clear and bright; Old smoking-jacket, how I bless This sweet release from evening dress. My faithful brier, with amber stem, Lead me to fancy’s boundless realm ; No need to shun thee, lest perchance She'll note thy fragrance in the dance. My warm Scotch friend, the kettle sings, To mitigate thy fiery stings ; Now, Ovid, tell me tales of Rome— No cards are out for this ‘‘at home.” Harry Romaine. ARR for his release, Judging from Mrs, Maybrick’s case, American agitation is not conducive to the enlargement of prisoners in Europe; yet the latest news of Mrs. May- A LITTLE BRACING HEIR,