Life, 1897-07-01 · page 18 of 20
Life — July 1, 1897 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page presents three brief humorous anecdotes typical of early Life magazine's satirical format: 1. **The Sunday School Incident**: A disciplinarian teacher physically removes a talkative boy from one classroom, only to accidentally eject the visiting head teacher instead—a reversal joke highlighting the authority figure's mistake. 2. **The Telegraph Proposal**: A Brazil telegraph operator receives a marriage proposal and relays an enthusiastic acceptance ("Yes" repeated nine times), playing on the absurdity of conducting romance via telegram and the woman's excessive enthusiasm. 3. **The Court Stenographer**: A judge speaking at 250 words per minute doubts the stenographer's ability to keep up, only to discover the court reporter is actually ahead of schedule—a joke about underestimating quiet, efficient workers. The page is otherwise dominated by period **advertisements** for underwear, cyclometers, bicycles, malt extract, rye whiskey, and patent medicines—typical commercial content of the era. These anecdotes exemplify Life's focus on everyday social mishaps and verbal wit rather than political satire.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
~ echolars in the next room. Tie head teacher in a Sunday school was much worried by the noise of the At last, unable to bear it any longer, he mounted a chair and looked over the partition, Seeing one boy a little taller than the others talking a great deal, he leaned over, hoisted him over the partition and banged him into a chair in his room, saying : “Now, be quiet.” A quarter of an hour later a small head appeared round the door and a meek little voice said: ** Please, sir, you've got our teacher."— 77t-Bits, Some time ago, Manager Wardlow, of a telegraph office in Brazil, took a telegram which read : “Miss —, will you be mine?” It was delivered to the proper party, and soon she came tripping into {fice to wire her reply. It read: “Ves. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Ten words, you see, and she paid her quarter, and then tripped out of the room with the sweetest kind of a blush, —Fvansville Courier. the ANENT the prevailing discussion as to the highest speed ever attained by expert shorthand writers, there is a story going the rounds of the feat of a Georgia court stenographer, which by long odds broke the world’s record in that line of work. It was when that emisent jurist, the late Judge Richard Clarke, was presiding in the Atlanta circuit of the Superior Court, One of the moe, remarkable murder trials was in progress. The evidence was conflicting, ao the Judge was called upon to charge the jury on some decidedly new az: interesting legal points. Now the Judge was arapid talker. In this instase it was very important that every word he spoke should be correctly recorded, and he so cautioned the stenographer. Then Judge Clarke began. As he warmed up to his charge he was speaking at the rate of two hundred and fifty words a minute. Once he glanced towar, the stenographer, That worthy official seemed to be half sleeping over bi work and apparently writing very slowly. “Mr, , are you getting my words down correctly ? At this the stenographer seemed to wake up. replied ; ** That's all right, Judge, fire away. of you now !"— Washington Post. asked the J 3 With little concern 1 am about fifteen words aheat A CLERGYMAN says that he was one day called down into his parlor perform a marriage ceremony for a couple in middle life. “ Have you ever been married before ?" asked the clergyman of the b groom. “*No, sir.” “Have you ?” to the bride. “Well, yes, I have," replied the bride, laconically, ** but it was tweotr years ago, and he fell off a barn and killed hisself whe we'd been marriet only a week, so it really ain't worth mentioning.” ", Tribune. HEALTH. FIT AND COMFORT Bat THE } Actual ize. } PRICE $1.30. Weight, 1 07. pinching or wrinkling— i" A MISS IS AS GOOD AS A MILE,” VEEOCR MFG. CO., Hartford, Conn. | AS OBIEF YEAR CYCLOMETER Never misses a milo: DUST PROOF. WATERPROOF. Positively Accurate. AT ALL DEALERS. Booklet Free, THE MONARCH ; CYCLE THE MECHANICAL | CTRIUMPH OF THE ho slipping up or down. ‘The most violent exer- Clse fails to displace It. “Never rip and never tear, Ypsilantt Underwear." A Thing Well Begun, Is Already Half Done. ‘This maxim applies to those who have been using as a remedy for all diseases of the throat and lungs, also as a pure and safe stimulant, the genuine “OLD CROW RYE,” bottled only by us. Keep on using it. Beware of imitations and refilied bottles. Buy only of reliable houses. H. B. KIRK & CO. (ESTABLISHED 1853), 69 FULTON ST., Also BROADWAY and 27th ST. LS S.2.2.2.2.9.8,9.3 * : Seno Foe Catatoce: Monarch Gde Mfg.Co. (mince, st veed. Lonoen A GREAT REMEDIAL AGENT, Although physicians were for many years reluc tant to recognize any mineral water asa remedial agent, many of them have of late been won ove! by the remarkable results obtained with Builak Lithia Water in the treatment of diseases having their origin in Uric Acid, such as Bright's Diseas| and Rheumatism, as well as in the treatment nervous diseases and dyspepsia. Many emines' physicians have tested Buffalo Lithia Water, tht results inevery case warranting a most hearty et dorsement of its efficacy. Unsurpassed asa tabi water, it represents one of the most useful an¢ beneficial products nature has given to mankind.