Life — April 2, 1896 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Uncle Gayboy: Vs, BOYS, IF YOU HAVE THE RIGHT STUFF IN YOU IT's BOUND TO COME OUT. “1s THAT WHAT MAKES YOUR NOSE SO RED?” THE DIRGE OF THE HOUSEHOLDER. OW can I sing of my mistress’s chiding ? How can I liken her hair to the sun? Rather I'd dwell on the ruin that's hiding In anthracite coal at six dollars the ton ! How is it possible, prithee, I question, To rhyme of the graces of Madeline's boot, While comes despair at the very suggestion Of gas at one dollar the vanishing foot? How can I give my attention to vers Gladsome and dainty as finely wove silk, Mentally damning with deep basso curses The man who invented the drinking of milk? Searching a rhyme, my poor brain doth but borrow Figures and worry till all scems a blank ! How can I pay out two hundred to-morrow With only one hundred and eight in the bank? Richard Stillman Powell. ON THE WRONG Lay. comicbooks.com