Life — March 26, 1896 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Mx. Lincotn never told a story except for a purpose. [remember one that he told in my presence. A certain Judge Krum, a lawyer, had been complaining of the treatment he had received from a local judge. He swore he meant to carry his case to the Supreme Court and humiliate the upstart judge who had decided against him. Mr, Lincoln spoke in his quiet, dry way : “That makes me think of a story. There was a certain man who dreamed that a treasure was buried, and that to find it he had to dig in a certain spot. His labors were to be crowned with success only on condition that he keep silent while he was digging. He began to dig. A terrific battle was waged near him. A naval encounter was fought near by. Innumerable people tried to engage him in conversation. Still he kept silent, A great giant passed, walk- ing very rapidly. ‘The digger did not even turn his head. Aftera while adwarf came prancing along, walking as if he were nine feet high. ** Say,’ he said to the digger, ‘did a giant pass here “The digger did not answer. The dwarf repeated his inquiry. No answer. ** Can't you answer a civil question ? asked the dwarf. No answer. “Oh, well,’ said the dwarf, *1’ll just walk along and overtake him.’ “Then the digger broke his silence. “The h—I you will!” he said."— Washington Post. STEVENSON told a story about his friend Joe Blackburn that is said to have nettled the Senator because it came too near to the facts for mutual enjoyment. In early manhood, it is said, the Senator was not conspicuously retiring or reti- cent to such a degree that it required more than one yoke of oxen to draw from him an opinion upon any public question at any time whatsoever. Mr. Stevenson said that once when a celebrated desperado was to be publicly executed in Ken- tucky, Joe Blackburn, then a rising politician, chanced to be among the spec- tators. Before the sheriff adjusted the noose to the neck of the condemned man he tendered him the customary privilege of making any dying observations he DLP LLL LLL LLL ALLL A LIAL LL LL LY THE SNOWBLACK SHAWKNIT STOCKINGS, PERMANENTLY BLACK, oe «. SOFT, GLOSSY AND DURABLE, wave BEEN'IN HICH REPUTE FOR YEARS. Sold by the trade generally and obtainable direct from the manufacturers. MEDIUM-FINE COTTON HALF-HOSE, STYLE .18s8, @ 25c., POST-PAID. EXTRA-FINE 1030, ‘* 28c., 50c., 1‘ 40c., ener SHAW ‘STOCKING CO., Lowell, Mass. S‘~ 7 STS ST SSE EST STE STI TITAS TESS EXTRA-FINE =“ a From best combed yarn, MEDIUM-STOUT COTTON HOSE, i “ Yn. Vand 1 rib for Boys and Girls, ER Send for Desertptive might desire to for the benefit of his hearers. “I don't think I've got any remarks that "—the man began to say, when he was cut short by a loud, cheerful voice, shoutin “Say, Bill, if you hain’t got anything special to talk about, I wish you would give me about fifteen minutes of your time just to let me say to these good peo- ple that | am a candidate for their suffrages and to show some reasons why “Hold on,” said the desperado, ** Sheriff, who is that man ?” “That's Blackburn.” “What Blackburn ? Joe Blackburn 2” “Ves.” “Tthought so. Give him my time. hang me first and make Blackburn talk afterward.” Give him all of it. But go ahead and —New York Herald. YEARS ago the courts in Western New York found it a matter of great diti- culty to collect juries for the trial of cases. Not many of the men of the region took enough interest in the carrying on of courts of justice to be willing to leave their daily work to answer even an imperative summons to the jury-box. One case of considerable importance was adjourned from day to day, so the story runs, on account of the mysterious disappearance every morning of some of the twelve men who had been drawn and sworn on the jury ; there were never more than eight of these unwilling victims to be found at one and the same time, One morning, however, when the judge's patience had entirely departed, the sheriff came bursting into the court-room, his face flushed with the excite- ment of victory. “It’s all right now, your honor!" he cried, joyfully. to-day, for we'll have the jury by twelve o'clock, sure, It ain't but ten o'clock now, and I've got eleven of ‘em locked up in my barn, and we're running the twelfth man with dogs, your honor !"— Youth's Companion. “You can try the case Keep the Neatiminton tn mind NUBIAN | : , Fast Black Cotton Dress Linings WILL NOT CROCK. Ladies and dresamakers everywhere hare proved their high character. Positively unchangeable, Not “ow Pabst...... Malt Extract The “Best” Tonic Rounds the body, and fills the hollows vt till dimpled bests makes plump the form, % UTHEARTOF BREWING WAS | AUS) Voeve1ope0ay THE GERAANS. affected repirati Mad the'Gneat Oowas and inexpensive Drewes, On At All Dry Goods Stores. Look for this on every yard of the Selvage. Glock ue (HELM SMILE RHINE « Vioters (Name THE QUEEN OP PERFUMES If you want a real Violet GOUT? For Sale by Druggists. PAMPHLET Face. LEHN & FINK, Agents, New York. Gravel, Calculus, Lazy Liver, and all’ Uric EF irer WILL CURE TT. Perfume, be sure you get “Mo, 4711 Rhine Violets” It is not a combination a other scents, but is abso lutely true to thé: flower. Cut this advertisement 4GC out and show it to your dealer. MOLHENS & KROPFF, New York, U.8.Ageats Acid Trouble comicbooks.com