Life — March 12, 1896 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A wuist player in Chicago who considered himself a great authority wrote a book on the subject and sent it to a famous Milwaukee player for his opinion of it. In about a week the book was returned to him, with the following letter : “ My Dear Sik: Your favor of the — instant, accom- panied by your book, was duly received. I have read it very carefully. It seems to be a very good game, but I don’t think it is as good a game as whist. “Sincerely yours, oe Four players started a game of whist not long since, a noted wit being one of them, He was dealing and made a misdeal. He dropped his cards and burst into laughter. ‘That reminds me," said he, “of my dear old friend, Judge Peckham, father of the present judge. He was a great whist player of the ‘old school,’ and had scant patience with a poor player. 1 was passing the card-room one day and met one of the poorest players in the club coming out. ‘Have you been playing whist ?° Lasked. ‘Yes,’ said he. ‘Who was your partner?’ ‘Judge Peckham,’ he replied. ‘Did he pitch into you pretty strong?" ‘No, indeed. He only made one remark. I was dealing, and made a misdeal. The judge said, “Why, you fool, you don’t even know how to deal.” ‘This is the only remark he made during the entire game.’ "—Exchange. A YOUNG man with a delicate, straw-colored mus- tache and football hair, parted in the center and glued down to his temples, sauntered carelessly into one of the DAT SWORS AT Was Superior Courts the other day. He eyed the judge through his glasses, and sized up all the attorneys. ‘Then he walked up to the bar and poured out a glass of ice water. The judge, who is nervous and testy, had observed the young man and frowned down on the glued hairand glasses, When the young man boldly walked up to the bar and took a glass of ice water the judge fairly boiled with indignation at such temerity amounting almost to contempt. The young man was just raising the glass to his lips when the judge roared : “That water, sir, is for attorneys and other officers of the court.” The glass almost dropped from his hand ; he started violently, turned red, then placed the glass on the table and walked out of the court. The judge chuckled. Half an hour later the young man entered the court- room again with a roll of parchment in his hand, The judge glared at him savagely, but he never flinched. Finally there was lull in the proceedings, and he ad- dressed the court: “Your honor “What is it, sir?” “T wish to submit to the court my certificate of ad- mission to practice in the Supreme Court and all other courts of this State,” and he passed the parchment to the clerk. “Well, what of that ?” growled the judge. “Now, your honor, having presented the proofs of my admission to the bar I would now move the court that I be permitted to drink from the official pig and he calmly drained the glass of water he had left the table.—San Francisco Post. “TL see,” said the earnest boarder, “that they again petitioning Congress to recognize the Deityiag Constitution.” “But,” asked the Cheerful Idiot, “won't thug volve the recognition of—er—the adversary asa ent?"—Jndianapolis Journal. Goon SaMARITAN : Don't you know better thas drive that poor horse up hill so fast ? O'Connor: Uphill, is it! Oh! begorra, the ny) blind and he can't see it !—Pearson’s Weekl; A REDEEMING FEATURE. 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