Life — January 23, 1896 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘SEIS§ORS AT NVLLYS Isat in Union Square one evening smoking a cigar and enjoying the play of the fountains, and I scarcely noticed the man on the other end of the bench, When I got up to go, the cigar was pretty well done for, and I threw the stub away. As I did so the man rose and said : “Sir, was that the act of a true and courteous gentle- man “What do you mean ?" Lasked. “There, sir; there!" he exclaimed, as he pointed to the stub, **T was done with it, and I threw it away." “Yes, sir, you did, and again I ask you if it was the act of a gentleman? No, sir, it was not. You knew I wa: sitting here.” “And waiting for my stub?" “Certainly, sit! Yes, sir, I was waiting for it, and you deliberately tossed it away. Does one gentleman treat another gentleman in this manner ?” “Excuse me,” I said, as I picked up the stub, may | offer you this bit of cigar ?” “Are you a gentleman, sir?" he demanded. “TL hope so.”* “Then, sir, absent-mindedness. wher "Yes." “Then it is all right. As a gentleman you uncon- sciously threw away enough cigar to keep me smoking for a quarter of an hour. As a gentleman I called your Attention to the breach of etiquette. Asa gentleman you repaired your dereliction, and asa gentleman I thank you and wish you good evenin; And as I moved away he was smoking the stub with great vigor, and evidently enjoying the smoke to the fullest extent.—New York Recorder. “but I accept your offering and excuse your Your thoughts were probably else- “Ever have any trouble with your wheel 2” “Not yet,” said the sweet young thing. ‘So far, whenever I have run over any one, I have been able to ket away before he got up.""—/ndianapolis Journal, To THE large number of stories of the ‘‘ meanest man" which are frequently related should be added that of a certain Frenchman famous for his habit of grumb- ling at everything and on every occasion. He was attacked by inflammatory rheumatism, and was very carefully nursed by his wife, who was very devoted to him, in spite of his fault finding disposition. His suffering caused her to burst into tears sometimes as she sat by his bedside. One day a friend of this invalid came in and asked how he was getting on. ** Badly, badly,” he exclaimed, ‘and it's all my wife's fault." “‘Is it possible 2” asked his friend, in surprise. “Yes; the doctor told me that humidity was bad for me, and there that woman sits and cries just to make it moist in the room.""—Pearson's Weekly. THERE was an old colored man pushing a whitewash cart along Brush street the other afternoon when a woman opened a chamber window and called to him: “*Hey, you! Do you wanta job?” ‘* What sort of a job, mum ?" he asked as he stood at the gate. ** Carrying ashes out of the cellar.” “‘Werry sorry, mum, but I couldn't do dat job. I used to be in de ashes business, but I'ze dun quit it. If it was whitewashin or beatina ca'pet, I'd be right on hand, but I doan’ tech ashes no mo’. “What's the matter with ashes ?”” “Heaps de mattah, mum. Last job I worked on I found three knives, five fo’ks, seben spoons, two towles COPELAND AND DAY, BOSTON, Poems. By Alice Meynell. Lovers’ Saint Ruth's, By Louise Imogen Gui The Arabellaand Araminta Stories. By Ge Smith. With an introduction by Mary rh ean ’ STONE AND KIMBALL, CHICAGO, Galloping Dick, By H. B, Marriott Watson. LONGMANS, GREEN AND COMPANY. NEW YORK. The New Centurion, By James LONpox S. Eastwick, G. P. PUTNAM’S SONS, v YORK. The Second Madame. A memoir of Elizal € tharloste, Duchess d’Orleans. By M. Louise aughlin dun s'pose de jedge gimme fur i “T don't understand,” she said. “Why, a policeman took me to co't, aa jedge gimme three months in jail.”” “He must have thought you stole the thing’ “Sartinly, mum, sartinly, an dat's why I gf dat owin to suspishus occupashun of de ss pected suspishun I’ze heaharter gwine to td myself right down to whitewashin an ca'pen. Detroit Free Press. Lorp Houcnton’s sister was often annoyed q her brother's indiscriminate hospitality. ‘Do remember, my dear,” he asked her at dinner a day, ‘whether that famous scoundrel X. hanged or acquitted 2” “He must have been hanged, or you would had him to dinner long ago,” replied the lady Argonaut. EUROPEAN AGENTS—Messrs. Brentano, 37 Avenue de l'Opera, Paris; h’s News Exchange, 1 'Clarastrasse, Mayeoce, Germany, Agents for Germany, Austria and Switzerland. & De Lo For sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. The Inter- Petade) national News Company, Bream's Bullding, Chancery Lane London, E. 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