Life — December 5, 1895 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: =a OUR FOOLISHs.. ‘@NTEMPORARIE 1 pips'r believe a lot of rustics would have the nerve to fool with a real city man, when I came here to live in Hayville. I told them a few adventures of mine on the Bowery, and how I had once answered back a policeman (in the ante- Roosevelt era), and I thought I had scared the whole crowd, My ultimate object, in all this, was to keep the villagers away from the pear trees in the lot I had rented and which surrounded the house wherein I intended to live forevermore. As the days moved carelessly by I smiled a knowing smile, and became more and more convinced that my big bluff about that Broadway policeman and my hints about man-traps, shot guns, poison and bloodhounds had had their effect. And so it came to pass that I vaunted me in the public post-office (which is just outside the private post-office, where the postmaster and his family read the mail before they give it out) about my sucess, and derided the inhabitants of the whole county. “Now, Meester," said the justice of the peace, in reply, you must remember that your pears weren't fit to eat till to-day. Give ‘em time. I told him I would be in my house the next day and would give ‘em buckshot, instead of time, if they ever stole any of my pears. Well, I would if they ever did. But the fact of the matter is, I haven't any THE GRANDE Maison deBlanc IMPORTERS OP Fine Lace Curtains, Bed, Table and Fancy Linens, Have removed to the larger premises \ 301 Fifth Avenue,\ This celebrated House, with world- wide reputation, has recently been re organized and all orders will now be promptly executed. Ladies residing out of town can have our representative call or goods sent on approval. Gzq) Essence Hine = VioLets (Name Regiteret.) TME QUEEN OF PERFUMES If you want a real Violet Perfume, be sure you get 4“‘No, 4711 Rhine Violets” It is not a combination of other scents, but is abso- lutely true to the flower. Cut this advertisement out and show it to your dealer. MULHENS & KROPFF, New ¥1 Importer and Maker of RICH FURS 24 East 23d St., Madison Square, South. MAK) OF Persian, Mink, Sealskin, and Crown Sable Garments. IMPORTER OF Theatre and Carriage Wraps, Cloth Driving. Coats, For-lined and Trimmed. A rich variety of exclusive things in Collarettes and Capes, Garments remade to present style of Fashion. Wholesale Department. Skins and Trimmings for Tailors and Makers of Robes et Manteaux. > BENEDICT’S TIME (Trade Mark.) Diamonds and Watches No Increase in the Price of Our Diamonds. Watches, Dismonds aioe Biol Jewelry, omere BENEDICT.” Only perfect cuff, sleeve, and collar Button made. Goes in like a wedge and pis around across the 4 buttonhole. : Strong durable, and can be adjusted with perfect ease. No wear or tear, This patent back can be put on any sleeve button. BENEDICT BROTHERS, KEEPERS OF THE CITY TIME. Benedict Building, Broadway and Cortlandt Street, Established 1821. pears. All of mine were stolen that same evening, before I moved in. I found a pitchfork, under one of the trees, that bad evidently been used for the purpose of pulling down some of the high-flying pears, and I waited with delight the appear- ance of the owner. Who should the owner prove to be but that same old justice of the peace! He came around with the most innocent expression on his face imaginable, and said that the same crowd that stole my pears had stolen his pitch fork, and that he wanted to recover his property. Iam really beginning to wish I were back among the dear old honest, simple confidence men of New York.— Tom Hall, in Truth, Ir was a poor little waif who came to East Gloucester one day last summer with a lot of Fresh Air Fund children, and asa friend of the Saunterer’s had the party in charge, the Saunterer was invited to come and help entertain them. So he brushed his gray hair and tried to remember what games they used to play when Ae was a boy, and betook himself to his friend's house, and discovered when he got there that the visitors didn’t need his games at all, but had games of their own that were quite as amusing. And so it happened that presently the Saunterer wandered down on the rocks by himself, and there in a quiet place he found the poor little waif surveying the ocean. : “Hello, little girl,” said the Saunterer—somewhat doubtfully, to be sure. * Wouldn't you like to come and play some games with the other little girls?” “Ob, no, sir,” said the waif, ‘I'd rather Idok at the water.” And what do you find to interest you in the water?” “Oh, there's such lots of it,” said the waif enthusiastically. “And it's the only time in my life I ever seed enough of anything.”—Boston Budget. ‘The Magazine de Luxe of the Season. The Christmas umber or THE Pall Mall Magazine EDITED BY Lord Frederic Hamilton and Sir Douglas Straight. READY ON NOVEMBER 18, 185. PRICE 25 CENTS. Among the many attractive contents will be found HER GRACE THE DUCHESS OF CLEVELAND: “Raby and its Memories.”” A richly illustrated historic article, charmingly nar- rated, describing the beauties of this famous North of England Castle. LORD ERNEST HAMILTON: “The Chess Club.” A thrilling story of modern Nibilism, in which a Rail- way Race forms a sensation incident. 7 JOHN J, WALLER: “Behind the Scenes at Monte Carlo."* ‘An unvarnished narrative of the inner working of the Mecca of the Mediterranean. It will be read with avid- ity by every reader. The article will contain information never fore published of the world-famous Casino, Tt will give the Balance Sheets of recent years, and will furnish particulars of the management, hitherto inaccess- ible. Moralists will find in the details’ given the inspir- ation for renewed crusades, while cynics will smile at the disclosures as a fresh illustration of the vanities in which Society indulges. New York: Tho International News Com- any, 83 Duane Street; Toronto: The Toronto News Company ; Montreal: The Montreal News Company. It'ga pleasure to get up in tho miorning if the use of ‘WRIGHT'S ANTISEPTIC Myrrh Tooth Soap s-" 221% put up in ele- ind decorated AS Chemists, Detroit, Mich. Beware ov IMiTatioss. Sample eent free. THICK OR THIN, PLAIN OR ORNAMENTAL. OF FINEST WOODS. For Halls, Parlors, Dining, Bed-Rooms, Etc CAN_BE LAID OVER OLD FLOORS OR NEW. Write for New Design Book. ‘| The Interior Hardwood Co. Mfrs. 4 Imdianspolis, Ind. U.S.Ageats Goto Lae BRUT