Life — November 14, 1895 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE - © {e) A RESIDENT of Yonkers called at the office of the superiatendent of the New York Central in this city the other day, and, sendieg in his card, was promptly admitted to the private room of that official, As he ships considerable freight over the Central's tracks, his reception by the superintendent was a cordial one. “Lam about to take my family up to Saratoga Saturday morning,” he said, “and have come to ask you asa favor to have the 8:30 train flagged at Yonkers, so we can get to Saratoga early in the afternoon, It would be extremely incon- venient for us to be compelled to go down to the Grand Central Station in order to board the train, and I think I can safely ask the favor of having it stopped for me at Yonkers.” The superintendent picked up a time table from his desk, glanced it over, and said : Well, the rules of the road are very strict on the subject of flagging trains to take on passengers at stations not designated as stops on the train schedule. We seldom grant such requests, even to important officials of the road. If we were to comply with one-quarter of the requests of this sort that we receive, our express trains would be able to make no better time than the ordinary way trains. But we appreciate the fact that we receive a good share of your shipping business, and for that reason are disposed to accommodate you. Youcan depend upon the 8:30 train stopping at Yonkers next Saturday morning. Have your family ready to get on board, as the train must not be delayed.” The caller expressed his grateful thanks to the superintendent and departed. At 8:20 the following Saturday morning he and his family were driven up to the station in great haste, in two coaches, while an express wagon unloaded several trunks. Having purchased tickets for the party the gentleman bustled out upon the platform, and, approaching the station agent with the haughtiness of a rail- road magnate, said : “1 suppose you received orders from the superintendent to flag the 8:30 train for me?” ‘The agent looked at him meekly and replied : “No, sir; I received no orders whatever.” “Why, that’s strange," he said,‘ The superintendent told me positively that the train would be stopped here for me.” The smile that spread over the station agent's face was interpreted by the gentleman to indicate a doubt as to his veracity, and he became properly in- dignant. The agent still insisted that he had received no orders regarding the flagging of the train. “ Well, the order must certainly have been sent out, and may have miscarried,” said the gentleman,‘ Can't you flag the train, anyhow 2” ** No, sir, that is out of the question. I wouldn't flag that train for Chauncey Depew himself, unless I had orders from headquarters todo so. It would cost me my job if I did.” At that moment the train was sighted in the distance, and the gentleman be- gan to prance around the platform in a state of great excitement. He pleaded, begged, and entreated the agent to flag the train, and finally threatened to report him to the superintendent, but all in vain, As the train drew near the station its speed slackened, and it finally stopped. ‘The waiting family was finally bundled on board ina hurry, and as the gentleman climbed on the car steps just as the train started he looked back at the station agent triumphantly and shouted in a voice that was audible to every one on the station platform : “« Didn't I tell you this traia was ordered to stop here for me ?"” The agent grinned and retorted in stentorian tones : “Why this train has been stopping here every morning for the last fifteen years."—New York Sun. “THERE is no ingenuity I admire so much as that of the men who get up cyclopzedias,” said Mr. Cawker to his wife. “Why ? “ Because it is the most ingeniously ingenious ingenity extant, that's why. Tl iftustrate. I wanted a little mformation on the planet Jupiter. I went down- stairs to the library, and ia my simplicity took out the book which, according to the inscriptions on the back, contained the ' J's." *J* is the first letter in the word ‘Jupiter,’ you understand.” Mrs, Cawker nodded. “Well, I carried the book upstairs and settled myself to absorb useful in- formation about Jupiter. Opening the book, I tracked along alphabetically until I came to where Jupiter ought to be—and what do you suppose I found ?” “Tean't imagine,” “Just this—‘Jupiter, see Planetary System.’ There comes in the ingenuity of the cyclopadia men, First, they never put the information you want under the head you would naturally look for it to be under, and then they carefully put the article to which they refer you in another volume entirely. To do this un- erringly requires a great mind, madam.” And Mr. Cawker stalked off downstairs to pursue his hunt for information about Jupiter.—Harper's Magazine. 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