Life — October 3, 1895 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

As the opened for business in the morning a crowd Ir was a new bank in a new town in Colorado. “institution of two hundred men gathered, and when the banker asked what was wanted the man who had been appointed spokes- man replisd : “It's jest this, Jim, We can’t make out that monthly statement you got out yesterday.” + What's wrong with it?” “She says deposits amount to $7,000, and cash on hand “Well, that’s correct, and I can’t see where you have any fault to find,” said the president, “Yes, but the boys don’t go much on figgers. kin be twisted all around, you know. ‘ere $0,000 handy by ?” oT have. + Waal, won't you jest stand up on a chairand wave that money in the air a few times and let the boys see the color of it? Don't want to put you to any special trouble, you know, but the crowd kinder wants to feel sure about it.” ‘The banker got the money from the safe and followed the suggestion and asked if they were satisfied. * That's all right,” replied the spokesman.“ We ain't much on figgers, but we know money when we see it, Figgers Have you got them ‘Them deposits is $7,000, and you've ot $9,000 to pay ‘em: That's chuck up and no discoun “ Anything else ?” “ Jest one little trifle. It's kinder got around town that you are goin’ to Montana to-morrer. Before you start jest count them $9,000 into the safe, lock 'er up as tight asa drum and then call in two or three of the boys to watch ‘er while you're gone. Weain’t showin’ any lack of confidence, Jim, but we is givin’ you a p'inter on how to run a bank in this town without gettin’ yer neck into a slipknot !"— Detroit Free Press. Iy his desire to use fine language the darky sometimes allows his ideas and statements to become a trifle confused, as well as confusing. Some years ago a handbill announcing a ‘colored pic- nic” to be held ina grove near a Southern city was freely circulated. After various highly enticing announcements relative to the delights in store for the partakers in this entertainment the bill concluded with the following puz7! notice printed in italics ood behavior will be strictly and seservedly enjoined upon all present, and nothing will be left undone which will tend to mar the pleasure of the compan: E GIRLS. By Abbe Carter Goodloe, Ney Charles Scribner's Sons of Spring. By Louis M. Elshemus, The Peter Paul Book Company. Elisabeth's Pretenders. By Hamilton Aide York and London: G. P. Putnam's Sons. Last Poems of James Russell Lowell New York: Houghton, Mifflin and Company Washington, or the Revolution. A Dra Allen. Chicago and New York: F. Tennysor Old South Leafets, Numbers 33-64. Boston Directors of the Old South Work. Butta A NEIGHDOR whose place adjoined Bronson Alo had a vegetable garden, in which he took ag interest. Mr. Alcott had one also, and both ae were especially interested in their potato patcte: One morning, meeting by the fence, the neigh said, * How is it, Mr. Alcott, you are never trout with bugs, while my vines are crowded with them ?# “ My friend,” replied Mr. Alcott, “I rise very a in the morning, gather all the bugs from my v and throw them into your yard."—Argonaw! * The late editor's wife is something of ah “Indeed ?” “Yes; took a line from his original salutatory placed it on his tombstone.” “What was it?” “We are here to stay.” "—.I¢lanta Constitution Britain. | The Inten Funoreay Aoexts—Mesra Brentano, 37 Aveaue do Opera, Lane, Varta, Saarbach's News Fxchange, 1 ‘Clarastrame, Germany, agents for Germany, tite aod Se itzeriand, JUST PUBLISHED. 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