Life — June 20, 1895 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HIS ANXIETY. €6\YVOUNG man,” the solemn stranger said, “What's going on inside ?” “A baseball game—eight innin’s played,” The budding sport replied. “ Baseball upon the Sabbath day ? O wicked sinful land | Er—in the ninth now, did you say ? Young man—how do they stand?” —Kansas City Journal. A New York undertaker, or funeral director, as the reader may prefer, advertised for a driver for a hearse, and among the applicants he selected a good-looking, strong fellow, with a solemn countenance, and took him into his private office, ‘Before employing you,” said the undertaker, “1 want to know if you have had any experience in this business ?”” “Well, E never drove a hearse," admitted the applicant, “but I've drove the next thing to it, and I guess I can give you satisfaction.” ‘+ How do you mean? I don’t understand,” and it was evident from the undertaker’s puzzled look that he was speaking the truth, ** Why,” said the applicant with confidence, “I drove a rapid delivery wagon in Philadelphia for seven years.” He got the job.—New York Sun. For slo by all Newsdealers tn Great Britain. ational "Ni London, C., Engiaod, Aouxts. Ivory S “Men should be what they seem,” and so should soaps, but Ivory is the only soap cent pure. Tne Paocren & Gaucit Co., Ci THE ADIRONDACKS. Hotel Ampersand, 10 hours trom New York without change. Centrally located, Within a short drive of all the principal resorts In the SPECIAL ATTRACTIONS FOR Swimming, rowing, canoeing, sailing, tennis, rates for June. Delightful month mountains. “ ELOQUENCE is speaking out out of the abundance of the heart,” say the authors of ‘Guesses at Truth.” An incident related by Doctor Barnardo, the English philan- thropist who cares for friendless children, illustrates this characteristic of eloquence. he said, ‘at my front door one bitter day in winter, when a little ragged chap came up to me and asked me for an order of admission. To test him I pre- tended to be rather rough with him. “How do I know,’ I said, ‘if what you tell me is true ? Have you any friends to speak for you ?* ‘«Friends!" he shouted. *No, I ain't got no friends ; but if these ‘ere rags ‘—and he waved his arm about as he spoke—‘ won't speak for me, nothin’ else will." "—£x, PRESIDING MAGISTRATE: premises ? PRISONER: Please, your worship, 2.4. M.; no police about; an open window on the ground floor—you would have climbed in yourself !—Fliegende Blatter. How came you to enter the “ Tnis is about the time of the year,” said Mrs. Watts to her neighbor, that the fishing fever strikes my husband. If he can get out on the banks of some creek and catch two or three little mudeats in the course of an afternoon, he is perfectly happy.” “So he is tond of fishing then?” “Fond of fishing?) Why that man is a perfect anglo- maniac."— Texas Si/tings. ‘The Inter fews Company, Tiream's Bullding, Chancery Lane, OAP that is 99,45 per Tt contaii amount of n ter than any uid Malt the market. On Lower Saranac Lake. and di Malt and unexcelled as a pleasa invigorant, and a valuable Ins. mountains, solid food. YOUNG PeoPLe. TEUTONIC S. LIEBMANN’S baseball and dancing.” S 1c For information address, EATON & YOUNG, Ampersand, Franklin Co., N.Y. 36 Forrest Street, Brot Rae’s Lucca Oi of Olive Oil. The Perfection Received the following awards at the COLUMBIAN EXPOSITION. “‘For Purity, Sweetness, and Fine, Olive Flavo' “*For Excellence of the Product and Size of Manufacture.” GUARANTEED ABSOLUTELY PURE BY Established 1836. Leghorn, Italy. Paris: Germany, Agents for Germany, Austra and Switzerland. “Fearon A Concentrated Liquid Extract of Malt 4 Hops. escents, nursing mothers, sufferers from insomnia yppepsia — superior to any other xtract on account of its purity, AT ALL DRUGOISTS. fsa detigbttul tad Settings. BREWING CO., EALTH NOTES FUR YOUNG ‘Amige Raymond Schroeder, M. D. William Wood and Company. 7 Cromwell. By George H. Clark, D. D. Harper and Brothers. ifloat With the Flag. By W. J. Henderson. ¥ York: Harper and Brothers. 4 The Adventures of Captain Horn. By Frank Stockton. New York: Charles Scribner's Sons. Far From the Madding Crewed, By Thomas Hxt New York: Harper and Brothers. Poems a) d Verlaine, Translated by Genrd| Hal "Crigagos Stontand Kiba Studies of Men. G.W. Smalley. New York and Brothers. Vale Yarn: WIVES, New for H Ry Tohn Seymour Wood. New Yor and London: ‘G. P. Putnam’s Sons, Washington: or the Revelation. By Ethan Men Chicago and New York: F. Tennyson Neely. SUs-EDITOR : anyway ? Eptor: Well, he’s a little too quaint for ordaar English and not quaint enough for dialect.—Sener ville Journal. How is Pennington on speing! ‘THERE was a vivacious smile on her face whict was most winsome. “Oh, dear me,” she murmured happily, just gotten such a bargain !” “How, dear ?” inquired her friend, “Tsent a telegram, only a quarter for ten weds and at least six of them were words of more tai three syllables !"— Washington Star. “Dy EvROreax AOEXTs—Mewrs. Brentano, 37 Avenue de VOpera, Saarbach’s News Exchange, 1 Clarastranse, Mayeoce, Grea say al ‘ite wn wo Grea Lamb, | —Syrac ins a greater utritious mat- y other Liq- Extract in For conval- And a single application of CUTICUR the great skin cure, will afford instast + lief, permit rest and sleep, and point tc speedy, economical, and permanent © of the most distressing of itching, bu ing, bleeding, scaly, and crusted skie« scalp diseases, after physicians, hospt and all else fail. The" Ir ind hass int_ appetizer, ratchin substitute for ABL sau d’ blows “ Kir 4 givis [Petit P » King Fdward st.. r & Ciigm. Corr., Sole Props , Bostoa, U.S. SONs' A pupit whispered in the next boy’ “ Our teacher is a regular duffer.” Scien The master, who had just put a qt fas reac to the whole class, thought the pop ¥ Soap. framing a reply, and said to him: “Come, my lad, speak up; perbsys 3” are right."—Chrontgue. ‘ a —— E ‘All you have guessed aboat ie oklyn, N.Y. Stes rou ki wish to know the truth, sa! % “How and Why, 4 Pexx Mutvat Lire, gt rs O° aut Street, Philadelphia. 5 comicbooks.com