Life, 1895-06-13 · page 12 of 16
Life — June 13, 1895 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Life Magazine Page Analysis This page from *Life* contains several brief satirical pieces typical of the magazine's humor: **"Mixing Salad"** mocks domestic gender roles—a man helplessly watching his girlfriend prepare salad dressing, then being told his only job is squeezing lemons, emphasizing male incompetence in the kitchen. **"Frigid"** jokes about a man's vacation ruined by an inconsiderate farmer who borrowed his clothes without permission. The "cool" pun suggests both temperature and audacity. **"A New Inception"** sardonically proposes expanding Memorial Day celebrations to honor Brooklyn trolley accident victims alongside war dead, darkly suggesting trolleys kill people regularly like a "modern reaper." **"What Was the Matter with Washington?"** satirizes the nation's declining honesty through the founding father's legendary inability to lie, now (the piece claims) nearly extinct. The remaining pieces contain brief joke exchanges about aging, horseback riding, and shaving. Overall, the page demonstrates *Life's* mix of domestic humor, social commentary, and political satire targeting American manners and institutions.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘LIFE: MIXING SALAD. HEN Polly, fair and deft of hand, Prepares to make the salad dressing. With fork and spoon I near her stand Man like—my helplessness confessing. Yet when I try to lend my aid In manner—meant to be quite pleasing. She says to me—this cruel maid : “ The lemons, Tom—s/ey need the squeezing.” FRIGID. os W*s it cool where you spent your vacation ?"” “Cool? I should say it was. away for a couple of days, and returned un- expectedly. 1 found the old farmer wearing one of my shirts and my straw hat; his two sons away at a picnic in my best clothes; and his wife straining jelly through my white flannel coat; and all they said was, ‘ We hain’t been expectin’ ye hum so soon.’ It was the coolest family I ever struck.” A DECORATION. T went Victorta Cross. A NEW INCEPTION. NE of the incidents of Memorial Day was the decoration of the graves of the Brooklyn trolley victims by President Monahan, of the Brooklyn Anti-Trust League. with the aid of the Baptist Boys’ Brigade. This gives to Decora- tion Day a renewed significance, and opens up an ever-widening vista for its celebration in the future. As the number of dead martyrs to the trolley increases, this idea, which first found its birth in Brooklyn, will gradually spread over the length and breadth of the land, and thus we shall have a dual celebration, one in memory of the thou- sands who died in the cause of their country, and the other in memory of the still more count- less legions who will no doubt continue to be mowed down by this modern reaper in the hands of Death. WHAT WAS THE MATTER WITH WASHINGTON? T' = latest research makes it appear that George Washington's inability to tell a lie was due to a painful malady now described as ~ paralysis of mendacity.” Latterly the disease has been almost entirely stamped out. il I TOLD Jones there was one thing people living in Philadelphia ought to be thankful for, but he didn’t ask me what it was.” “He knew you were lying.” ly id ed TERRIBLE. “Yes, 17's JUST TOO AWFUL To THIXK I'VE GOT TO GROW SO OLD THAT GENTS WON'T MAKE ROOM FOR ME IN THE CARS!” fe Wier you need is horseback exercise. “T've tried that, doctor.” “Didn't it do you any good?” “It did while I was on the horse.” **Do YOU WANT ALL FOUR MOUSTACHES BURNED, str?”