Life — August 10, 1893 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

~ LI AT SSISSORS AT WvLLv§ GEORGIAN PHILOSOPHY. H, what's the use o’ grievin’ ? We're jes in love with life ; For the blossom’s on the melon An’ the edge is on the knife! = —A¢danta Constitution. Some years ago the Russian Ambassador at Constantinople entertained a dis- tinguished party at dinner, and after the disappearance of the comestibles when the soothing cigar shed its benign influence around them, and helped or impeded digestion beneath their respective diaphragms, the conversation, which had been desultory, turned upon the discipline maintained in the several forces represented. “Tassure you, gentlemen,” said a Russian general who was present, that my servant Ivan, an old campaigner, can be dispatched upon an errand to any part of the town, and [ will tell you to an instant the time of his return.” “As some appeared rather incredulous, Ivan was summoned. “+L want you to go, ' said his master, *to the tobacconist by the bridge and get me a box of cigars. Here is the money. Now, gentlemen,” said the general, pulling out his watch and consulting it, ‘*he leaves the hotse. Now," after a pause, “he is at the end of the street ; now be crosses the 1oad ;_now he is being served ; now he is returning.” ‘Then, after another pause, and replacing his watch, '* Now, gentlemen he is here.” FE: “Ivan 1" Ashe uttered the word the servant entered the apartment with the cigars, All agreed that it was very cleverly done, with the exception of an obese and guileles pasha, who opined that it was nothing out of the way, and boastfully asserted that 4 Cipline among the Faithful was, if anything, superior to that of any other country, acdMt to provethe veracity of his statement announced his intention of performing a similar fea. PM) His servant was summoned accordingly. : ‘ “Ali,” said the pasha, ‘I wish yeu to go to the tobacronist by the bridge and ge me a box of cigars. Here is the money. Now, gentlemen,” said he, imitatir Russian, and consulting his watch, after a pause “hes at the end of the street. Now ne crosses the road; now he is being served ; now hey returniog.” Then after another pause, and replacing his watch, ** Now, gentlemen, bei here.” ‘ain “Tam here, Effendi,’ answered the individual, entering with a profusion of salaamy, “+ Well, where are the cigars?” “ His excellency’s slave has not yet discovered his slippers.” A roar of laughter greeted this reply, amid which the humiliated pasha retired ts order a dose of the bastigado for the unfortunate Ali.— Exchange. “THAT Miss Hawkins never gets things right.” growled Henderson, on the bot piazza. ‘Do you sce that tall tree over there ?_ Well, I told her I remembered the tine when that tree was so small I could jump over it and how do you suppose she told itt Maud Jenkins?” * How?” “Said I told her there was atime when I was big enough to jump over it."—/ar fer: Bazar. bers of Live can be bad by applying at this office. Single copins of xv. Movi. We Vie 1X, XVIL abd XE, $1000 SAreeurear Ta pare y Babecribers wishing addrem changed will greatiy facilitate matters by sending old addres aa we bound. | Ve ‘each, no int. Vol. I, bound, Vols Vols VIL, X., X1. 1, XIX. and XX. $5.06 Dew. IL, VIL, XII and XIV. $20.00 each, bound. Back 00. 2. numbers, one year old, % cents per copy. * YCLERS, ANGLERS, YACHTSMEN, HO Sportsmen, travellers, do you know What relief for rashes, stings, CELEBRATED HATS, —axp— Ladies Round Hats and Bonnets And The Duninp Silk Umbrella. 178 & 180 Fifth Avenue, bet. 234 & a3d Sts. and 18: Broadway, near Cortlandt St. NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. 916 Chestnut 8t, Phila. $2 Agencies in all Principal Citi Gold Medal Awarded, Paris Exposition, 1889. Packer's Tar Soap always brings ? Odors to its cleansing yield, irritations too are healed— Caused by sunburn, chafing, heat, Or by shoes that rub the feet. Rest, too, follows In the path Of a Packer's Tar Soap bath. EVERY MORNING AND NIGHT — USE -— Dentellaria Tooth Wash. For Cleansing and Preserving your Teeth. Ar Aut. First-Crass Davcersts, OR PROM THE PROPRIETORS, WING & COMPANY, - Jersey City. CROUCH & FITZGERALD, NEW YORK, ge MAKE THE MOST RELIABLE r St Trunks, Bags, ——_ ¢) Dress Suit Cases ae "4 I Hat Cases, —— ‘TOL GIZTH AVENUE, bet. 40:d and dist Sts. Senp ror a Catatocut LEWIS 6. TEWKSBURY, SPAULDING& (inconponatao.) Gold ana Silver Smiths.) CHICAGO, ILL. Cresson Springs onthe Penn- sylvania Railroad. The Pennsylvania Railroad announces that all through trains will stop, until further notice, at Cresson, an the summit of the Allegheny Mountains. This will afford pas- sengers to and from the World’s Fair an opportunity to break the journcy and enjoy a few days at this delightful resort. GRAVEN IMAGBS. Art Waros of all_kinds, rich and Silver Pieces, Watches, Clock, Diamonds and other precious ston Our stock comprises a most elaborate axi carefully made collection from all over t world, It holds out’ many. attractions visitors and residents. Our “Suggestion Book” be mailed free to any address. Popular Excursions to the World’s Fair by the Penna. Railroad. Special trains of newest and best standard passenger coaches, containing all modern conveniences, will leave New York at 9.00 A. M., July 31st, via Pennsylvania Railroad, for Chicago. Fare for the round trip, $20. Tickets good ten days. Other excursions fixed for August rath and 16th, 36 Ave de l'Opers, Parts. State & Jackson && Johannis. “King of Natural Table Water _, Of exceptional purity and excellence. Spirits. the peculiar softness, which its na/ural gas lends to the taste, rend ing it admirably adapted for the purpose.— London Lancet. BE CAREFUL to examine the label and also see that the cork is stampe! 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