Life — March 23, 1893 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

*- LIFE: aa A SEIS ORS i Ths - A TEST OF MERIT. PRETTY young girl was corrected one day For tapping her foot on the floor While an orchestra played—and the pretty girl looked At the speaker and thought him a bore. “can’t understand why people object, Tis justified sure on the whole. For what earthly good is the music I hear Jupce E. Rockwoop Hoak, remarking on President Lincoln's dry humor, says that on one occasion a delegation of colored men had waited upon Mr, Lincoln, and were evidently at a loss to know just what to say. The President waited a while,’ and then remarked : ‘* Well, all who are here seem to be present.” This self-evident proposition broke the ice and removed the spell from the African jaw.—Argonaut, “ Dips" you find him just as I represented him 2” Lavy (indignantly): No, sir. You said he was a bird dog, and he hasn't sung a note yet, and I've had him two weeks.—Ex. 3¢ “What do you think will be the biggest thing you will see at the World's Fair?” said Mrs. Fucash, “+My hotel bill,” replied her husband.—Washington Star. Mosr people are aware that it is the custom of turf gentlemen to settle their accounts every Monday at Tattersall's. It was on one of these occasions that a backer, by an Jnless it appeals sole.” oversight, paid his bookmaker a betting debt which he had settled already. This put the scle Mobess it appeals so:my sole = Baiew Ruazt bookie in’a mental fix as to what would be the best course for him to take, ‘Shall | hav ee rob my wife and family," he argued with himself, ‘vand return the money; or shall | ins} Mamay Cuurctt is an old negress who washes for a living, and who, in the — keep it and go about with a seared conscience ?" “Unable to decide the point himself, he delivery of her patron's goods, has a good deal of hobbling around to do in all sorts of Sought the advice of a brother professional of greater experience. PI weather. The present Winter has overtaxed her patience, and the climax of her com- ‘* Paid you twice over, did he ?" said the latter. ‘‘Ask him for it again !"—£x. plainings was reached on Washington's birthday, when the tremendous storm of that day evoked the exclamation ; ebber see de like er dis Winter sence I waz bo'n! Hit do Doctor: Madam, I may put your husband on his feet again, but I fear that he will erpear ter me dat de Lor’ done gettin’ ol’ an’ childish." —Boston Courier, never quite recover the complete use of his nerves. ‘ Wire: Oh, dear, what has John been doing to bring on such an attack ? “Tue Newriches are people who don't know who their grandparents were.” Doctor: He has confessed all to me. He tells me that yesterday he was rash PE “Oh, yes they do; but they hope no one else does."—Ex. enough to drink a cocktail that was made in a drugstore.— The Cub, Back nambers of Live can be bad by applying at this office. Single coples of Vola J. and IL, out of print. Vol. [, bound, 139.00, Vola IL, VIIL, XIII. and XIV., $20.00 each, bound. Vola VIL, X. XI, XIL. XV. —_ and XV1., $16.00 cach, bound. Volu Ly Ve N VEIX, XVID and Xt r e 5 5 one ye SUAS nes ors POAT BRE att tg Set Henk se Snr eG Om LEWANDO’S mn” |SPAULDING& Co : Dyeing & Cleans acker Ss yeing & Cleansing AmoOnPORATaO.) RSTABLISHMENT. 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