Life — January 5, 1893 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A LITTLE JUBILEE DINNER IN ARCADY. ScENE: A round table in the Octagon room / of a@ wayside inn, overlooking the Valley of f—~ Arcady. In the center of the table, a iz mound of flowers, on which ap- pears the motto, * While there's Life there's Hope.” On the sun: mit perches a well-known bird which at intervals cries out ( the kindness of Mr. Edison) “Americanus Sum! The la- dies of the party wear costumes which represent many different } styles of the past decade, and / are evidently suspicious of the social standing of each other. The men have long known each other in Arcady, are more at case, but are evidently not quite sure that they approve of the ladies, As the dinner advances and the wine glasses are filled and refilled with Falernian and Nectar, the constraint vanishes and everybody talks, Cuaracters: Life and Miss Fanny de Sidcle (costume after Gibson.) Mr. Howells and Miss Diana (of the Crossways.) Mr. James and The Egyptian (of Thrams.) Mr. Crawford and Miss Daisy Miller (of Schenec- tady, N.Y.) Mr, Bunner and Mrs. Hauksbee (of Simla.) Mr. Page and Princess Saracinesca (of Rome.) Mr. Meredith and Meh Lady (of Virginia.) Mr. Kipling and Miss Penelope Lapham (of Boston.) Mr, Barrie and Miss Midge (ot South Washington Square.) M! SS FAN (to Life, who ts in love _ with her): You dear boy, why did you give me the place of honor at the table ? 4 Lire: Because you are the bud of Cc the past decade, and you will be the perfect flower of the coming one. Every man of us here would rather please you than all the rest of the world. Miss FAN: Whatadance I lead you! Don't you find that I am hard to please ? LIFE (wth éntention): You are always kind to me, dear. Miss FAN: For that pretty speech I'll try to be gracious. But honestly, boy, | don't like your guests—the women | > mean. They are hardly in our set. Where did you pick them up? Lire: 1 told each man to bring one of his own family. Then I mixed the names in a hat and drew this combination Miss Fan: Well, I hope they like it, but I'm sure Mr. Howells looks bored. Lire: Why, Diana is the brightest woman at the table, but very romantic. while she talks. Diana (fo Life I know you are talking about me—but U'Il forgive you if it was kind. that I like his American girls, but not his married women— they See the “flashing arrows in her eyes” I've been telling Mr. Howells ‘© SO censorious. > LIFE > Howe They don’t call it that hard name in Boston ; it is simply * accumulating materials for a correct diagnosis of character.” Miss LapHAM: We are not a// given to ba Boston. Most of us are charitable. Miss FAN (astde to Howells); She is not quite in the s Old Silas Lapham’s daughter? (raésing her eyebrows) Paint? Meru Lavy: You Northern gyurls hadn't ought to be so critical of folks. We all simply flatter our sweethearts, and lead them ‘round with a gold chain. Daisy M R: > Well, [like that! Think of our flatter- ing Charley Rich and his set. They are so conceited now, that they think all the girls are in love with them. We have to train all the young nobs down with sarcasm before they are endurable. We are onto their style. PRI SARACINESCA (to Page): What queer Eng- lish that young woman speaks! I fear that | must have had an uncultivated teacher in Rome. It’s all so strange to me. PaG You must come and visit us in Ole Vah- ginia, my deah lady, to heah the real old English lan- guage. We are descended from the Cavaliers, madam. PRIN Now, I understand the peculiar spelling in ‘* Marse Chan.” It’s old English, isn’t it, like Chaucer and Beowulf ? PaGE (shifting the subject): Oh, | say, Meh Lady, you must invite the Princess down to the old plantation, She is writing a book about America, and it will be all Boston and New York as usual, unless we divert her. Mrs. -biting in vim in Boston, is she ? SS: HAUKSBEE: — Invite please. I want to see America. I only know what I've read about it in Mr. yf James's novels, and what Mr. Kipling has told me. BUNNER (behind his hand to Page): She must have a beautiful chromo picture of us then in her mental gallery. Imagine taking your impression of America from James and Kipling ! KiPLinG (laughing): Come, now, Bunner, | could not help hearing. Have not I atoned for the sins of my youth with “ The Naulahka 2" Isn't Zarvzn a good American ? BUNNER: He's not a real American; only a new! American, made by the drummer and the “ funny man.” KIPLING: BARRIE: me too, paper And never met with outside of Puck! What I've come over here to see is a real American girl. Miss FAN (with a glance around the tabley; You won't find her in contemporary novels Datsy MILLER (consctously): | think Mr. James has done us justice. Miss FAN (maticéously): Oh, yes, he has done justice to some of the freaks we annually export. James (calmly): Why do you keep some of your best freaks at home then? I can’t make bricks without straw. comicbooks.com