Life — November 17, 1892 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

*-LIFE- FEISGORS AT NvLL & IT FOLLOWED NATURALLY. HE called her miss, And she called him mister : ‘They continued this Till one night he kissed her Then their bashfulness They perceived was folly ; Now he calls her Bess ‘And she calls him Cholly. —New York Press. N Charles Dickens was in Washington, he met, one morning on the steps of the young Congressman from Tennessee, whom the at novelist had offended by his boorishness. That morning, Dickens was in great good humor and full of talk. I have,” said he, ** found an almost exact counterpart of Little Nell.” Little Nell who ?" queried the Tennesseean, Dickens looked him over from head to foot and from foot to head before he snorted out : ittle Nell ennesseean, ‘I didn’t know you had your daughter with you.” am speaking of the Little Nell of my ficti Oh,” said the imperturbable Tennesseean, consider that a rather trifling occupation for a grown up man ?” sir,” retorted Dickens, flushing. you write novels, do you? Don't you Dickens snorted like a quarter-horse and hurried down the avenue.—Argonaut. ‘THE fierce animosity some ardent housekeepers exhibit toward dust seems amusingly exaggerated to quieter souls, 1n enthusiast of this sort one evening, with a tragic air, requested her husband te accompany her to an upper chamber. he tired lawyer was impressed by her solemn manner, and heavily climbed the necessary stairs. The lady led him into a room and pointed sternly to a table. “Look at that,” she said indignantly. dust it. I believe she neglects it purposely. Tooked at the table and sighed. 4 lars. “Three times this week I have told Mary to 1 am completely disheartened.” The lawyer “My dear," he replied, ‘to-day I have had to deal with a murderer and two burg- T have also examined two wife beaters and one child stealer, but anything like the moral depravity of Mary I confess I never saw before—never !” ‘And the lady triumphantly led the procession down the stairs.—Har per's Bazar. THERE are trees in California so tall that it takes two men and a boy to look to the top of them. One looks till he gets tired, and another commences where he left off.— Exchange. At a large banquet of Irish jud containing only one small fish. “« This is a fast day for me.” ges and lawyers, two of them sat down before a dish ¢ of them drew the fish toward himself, remarking : The other speared the fish with his fork, and transferred it to his own plate, saying to his pious neighbor : *+ Jasus! do you think no one has a sow! to be saved but yourself ?"—Argonaut. acker’s Tar Soap. IS PURE, ANTISEPTIC, LATHERS READILY, SOOTHES IRRITATED SKIN. Its use for Bath and Shampoo gives one a sense of exquisite cleanliness. It removes Dandruff, allays Itching, makes the Hair Soft and Glossy; and WARDS OFF CONTAGION. Violet AND Lilac TOILET WATERS AND OPAL SMELLING SALTS. 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No first-class club, hotel, bar or saloon can afford to be without it. Adapted especially for gentlemen's sideboards and for sickness. Price $15 per case, containing 12 bottles. Received by us direct from the distillery. Address Acker, Merrall & Condit, NEW YORK, N. Y. YALE SPAULDING& Co. (smconponatan.) Gold ana Silver Smiths, DIAMONDS, Unusual purchases unusual care. A properly-bought diamond is as much of a fe-time’s delight as a hastily purchased stove is an after-a-time annoyance. We place at the buyer's disposal the most perfect possible assortment of Diamonds «nd Precious Stones, the result of our resident foreign buyers, Send for our * SUGGESTION BooK "—it's free. State & Jackson Sts. Chicago. 36 Ave, de l'Opers, Paris. It ts the choicest Smoking Tobacco that ex- perience can produce or that money can buy. MIXTURE ssoxina tosacco Whiting’s Select Stationery. The variety of beautiful papers manufactured by the Whiting Paper Company, of Holyoke, is almost endless. The most critical and exacting can to suit their taste. thing you want. Have you find among these papers one Delicate tints, soft finishes, linens—any- ever tried them? Ask your dealer for Whiting’s Papers; try them in the various kinds, and you will use no others. New York Offices and Factories, 148, 150 & 152 Duane St. comicbooks.com