Life — September 1, 1892 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE IT IS REMARKABLE, WHEN one has physic'd long enough, This cheering thought he bugs : That man is made of toughish stuff, To stand so many drugs. SHE: He: Sie: He: Yes, I am sure they are. Why, how do you know ? Haven't you noticed that when a prett —Exchange, That couple in front of us—do you think that they are married ? ‘They have been married a long time, too. girl comes on the stage she always ands the opera glasses over right away.—Somerville Journal. BOARDER : TANDLADY : “Miss De Trop had on the longest gloves last night that I ever saw. d them from her wrist to her elbow.” “That's nothing. Chicago News Record. It seems to me that every morning the past week the cakes have grown You probably forget that these are flannel cakes.—Chicago Inter-Ocean. She but- My girl buttons her's all the way from home to the theatre.” MR. HAMOXD, the successful Unionist candidate, in his magisterial capacity in Newcastle, is very well-known among the people, While Mr. Hamond was addressing the people a voice from the crowd bellowed forth, " Get your hair cut, Charlie.” Adjusting is spectacles and fixing an imperturbable look upon the individual, he retorted with splendid sang /rotd, ** My dear friend, if 1am not mistaken, I have been the means of your having your hair cut before to-day."—Newcastle Chronicle. PROFESSOR : Purr What terrible affliction did Homer have ? He was a poet, sir.—Boston Beacon. “« Fixe country, Egypt, but what a heat! One day under the pyramids, 1 cooked some eggs in the sun.” ** Bless you, that's nothing to Zanzibar, There we cook our eggs in the moonlight.” —Exchange. WHER ‘local rains” are predicted it means that the storm, instead of being wide- spread, will be separated into showers, which will fall only in places where people have forgotten their umbrellas. This is unofficial but reliable.— New York Herald. In a hall in Glasgow a few weeks ago there was a lecture on ‘ Marriage and After.” ‘The lecturer said that men should kiss their wives as they did when they were a year or two married. When the lecture was over an old man went home, put his arm around his wife's neck and kissed her. Meeting the lecturer next day, he said: “It's no go.” + What isa’t ?” said the lecturer. “Weel,” said the man, “when I kissed my wife she said, ‘ What's gone wrang wi? ye, ye auld fool ye ?"—Boston Globe. The Noblest Breakfast Food-on Earth! Tea Most Novnisianc ‘Tea Most Patataace ‘Tex Bastust Dicastep ‘Tea Quicxast Coors All Grocers Sett It. FREE Pamphien Fexaty mailed to’ all icants. HEALTH FOOD Co.'s Ottices Everywhere, Head Office. 61 sth Aven Yor! N, B. Ghee, top Tremont St., Philadelphia Office. 632 Arch St Western cago ice, ator Wabash A: 4 CHEAP, STRONG anp DURABLE, WILL WOLD 20 NUMBERS. Mailed to. f the U. 8. for Shon postage free Address office of “LIFE.” 28 W. 23d St., New York, “Be just and fear not, let all hou aim’st at be thy country’. tve the king, and if you ould serve him well,” serve im with Shrewsbury Tomato- tchup. CarvaienvaD CELEBRATED HATS, —AxD— Ladies’ Round Hats and Bonnets And The Dunlap Silk Umbrella. 178 & 180 Fifth Avenue, bet. 234 & a3d Sts. and 18: Broadway, near Cortlandt St, NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago, 916 Chestnut 6t., Phila, $47~ Agencies in all Principal Citi Gold Medal Awarded, Paris Exposition, 1889. CROUCH & FITZGERALD, NEW YORK, Tranks, Bags, Dress Suit Cases, Hat Cases, For American and European Travel. 161 Broadway, below Cortianat Bt. Decoration Furniture Curtains 133 FIFTH AVENUE NEW YORK. THIS PAPER IS PRINTED PECIAL - LIFE - INK MANUPACTURED BY THE W. D. WILSON PRINTING INK CO.,tTp. 10 SPRUCE ST., SPAULDING& Co. (inoonponatan.) Gold ana Silver Smiths. This is the proper season to be think- ing of well-made, specially-fashioned VACATION CONVENIENCES for the yacht; the camp; the country house; the Atlantic liner. We have, as usual, the best and latest. Brushes; Bottles with serviceable Leather Cases, are among the many vacation “things” mentioned in our “Suggestion Book.” Sent upon application, 36 Ave. de l'Opera. ris (Pan Btmite,) utemenee. Ecae sree ettained antrareal pov: | Wiis’ “SHAVING STICK. os nin dbetter ine fiche | Hl erence Iather, more wenses joing to the beard, ‘and more soothing to the face. Hasa bett [| case, , (ocaatiful. etroog red th eh fined with |} Id lacquered metal, cor Fich maroon, / leatherete). and tyy Neate, det it, selection of ‘tar of tose, the | i most cor ty o| Hie rare fou eet WALLIAL 1AM’, i ‘at me ood drug stores,” Don't take anzthing else. If yoar ‘drogebt will not supply | Matied to any po |) Xatict to any point postpaid for fie. tn stamps by | |) The. WILLIAMS CO., Glastonbury, Ct, U.S.A. ‘State & Jackson Sts. Chicago D1*'s THEATRE. Monday, Sept. 12, For One Week. ——$—$ Mr. Richard Mansfield x8th Edition, postpald for ase. (or stampa). THE HUMAN HAIR, ee why it kt Falls O Off, Turns Cog god perr THE SCARLET LETTER. By Prof. HA RLEY PAR’ C.F. Lone & Co,, 1013 Arch St. Philada., Pa. | To be followed by * Guimatpr.” “Brery one aboald read this little bank". athenowmn, Don’t Confine the use of Armour’s Extract of Beef to the sick room. It is invaluable to the sick and convalescent, but its largest field in the kitchen and camp. There are many ways of using Armour’s Extract. One little Cook Book explains several, We mail it free. N.Y. Send for Special Prices and Discounts, Armour & Company, Chicago. comicbooks.com