Life — July 21, 1892 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE: Owe evening, at the Grand Opera House in Gloversville, ‘+ Miss Osborne's Grand Metropolitan Comp ny,” of which no one had ever heard, played a horrible piece, osten- sbly by Sardou, of which probably Sardou had never heard. Next to a burly native, ‘eho was painfully absorbed in the tragedy, sata New York drummer, who could under- sand very little on account of the poor ‘architecture of the house. Turning to his neighbor the drummer remarked: ‘I find the acoustics very bad, don't you ?” "Yes, it is rather bad to-night," he remarked, sniffing the air; ‘you see it comes from the tanneries in the neighborhood. In hot weather the smell is worse than at other times" He again turned his attention to the stage and left the drummer to his re- fecions.—New York Sun. As Episcopal clergyman who has officiated twice at large political conventions says the only office in the prayer book for such occasions is the forms of prayer to be used for the court to defend a middle-aged fellow who was indicted for the murder of his mother. I took my client to one side for a consultation, and plumped the direct question at him: * Did you kill your mother? ‘Yes, he replied ; ‘1 did kill her.” “ Why did you do it?” I asked him. “1 killed. ber,” be answered, "because she wasn’t worth wintering. Mercury, New York ‘1 HEAR that Montgomery Montgomery has taken his son out of college.” “Ts that so? Was the youth getting rapid 2” “Oh, no; but his teacher asked him to work out a problem in mathematics and he objected ;’ said none of his folks had ever worked out, and the father sustained the objec- tion."—Detroit Free Press. Brownie is said to have relished greatly the story of the experience in Boston of an English friend, who, while staying at one of the principal hotels in that city, was unable to sleep, owing to mysterious, doletul noises that came from a room near by. Calling a boy, the Englishman asked what was the cause of the disturbance. ‘* Oh, sah!" was the lad's reply, "that is the Browning Club just reading Browning, sah, That is all, sab.” —Argonaut. those at sea.—Christian Inquirer. “THERE are a great many quaint characters in the mountainous rocky," said Congressman Wilson. ions of Ken- "Til tell you a little story by way of illustration: Shortly after I was admitted to the bar, and was ridiog the circuit, I was appointed by Eottor: See here! In this story you make one of the characters ask another how the thermometer stands, CONTRIBUTOR : Yes. Epitor: And then you write, “At ninety-six degrees, she replied in frigid tones.”"— N.Y. 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