Life — July 30, 1891 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘LIFE: AT SEIGGORS, AT LLY’ DONT, swallow ice water, danger it breeds Don't stand in the treacherous breeze, Don't call for fat meat when you sit down to eat, Don't worry, but live at your ease. Don't become heated—ket exercise go ; Don't seek for society's whirl, And one above all you had better recall— Don't flirt with the sweet Summer girl Exchange. Tue late Dr. Wightman, of Kirkmanhoe, one night, sitting up to read later than usual, imagined he heard a strange sound in the kitchen. ‘Taking his candle, he proceeded to investigate the cause. His foot be- ing heard in the lobby, the housekeeper began, with all earnestness, to cover the fire, as if preparing for bed. “Ye're up late to-night, Ma I'm just rakin’ the fire, sir, and gaun to bed.” “That's right, Mary ; I like timeous hours.”” On his way back to the study, he passed the coal-closet, and, turning the key, he took it with him. Next morning, at an early h was a rap at his bedroom door and a request for the key to I 55 “* Ye're too soon up, Mary ; go back to your bed yet.” Half an hour later, there was another knock, and a similar request in order to prepare the breakfast. * don’t want breakfast so soon, Mary; go back to your bed.” Another half-hour, and another knock with an entreaty for the key, as it was washing-day. This was enough. He rose and handed out the key, saying : ** Go and let the man out.” Mary’s sweetheart had, as the doctor shrewdly suspected, been im- prisoned all night in the coal<loset.— Argonaut. Iy the good old city which has been immortalized in story as River mouth, it chanced that a couple who did not move in the most exalted social circles, and from whom the most refined sentiments might not have been expected, were united in the holy bonds of matrimony upon the day which followed the funeral of the first wife of the groom. The conventional sense of propriety in the neighborhood was shocked by this haste in furnishing forth the marriage tables with the funeral baked meats, and upon the night of the wedding a company of sons of Belial gathered themselves together and went to serenade the bridal pair with horrid uproar of horns and pans and guns. The charivari was at its height, and all the region was aroused by the hideous noise, when the bride appeared darkly at the window above the notous crowd, and with supreme feeling appealed to their delicacy. n't you ashamed,” she cried in hot indignation, ‘to come he: making a disturbance like this when we had a funeral only yesterday ? —Boston Courier. POVERTY-STRICKE you like an angel! AMANDA: I should think so! wear. Not me!—Figaro. Svuitor: Be mine, Amanda, and I will treat Nothing to eat, and still less to Prickly Heat, Chafing, Dandruff, Odors from Perspiration. STILBOMA. A prepared Chamois Skin for pol- ishing Gold and Silver or Nickel, Steel and Brass. Always ready. No trouble touse, Lasts for years, The best and Speedy Relief by Using Packer’s Tar Soap. **It Soothes while it Cleanses.”’ Medical and Surg. Reporter, Phila, NADY CORVRIiGSYED. CELEBRATED HATS, —ane— Ladies’ Round Hate and Bonnets and The Dunlap Silk Umbrella. 178 & 180 Fifth Avenue, bet. 22d and 23d Ste., and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St. NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut St., Phila, S27 Agencies in all Principal Cities. Gold Medal Awarded, Paris Exposition, 18%. SUMMER BRANCH BAR HARBOR, NEWPORT, Kittredge Cottage, BRT Thames &t. o Bt Mew LEWANDO’S Fancy Dyers—French Cleansers te Bult and all Summer Clothing Cl * and Pressed to lock like mee. ene 17 Temple Place, Boston, 36s Fifth Avenue, New Yorx, rect In America, Main Orrices: | Comfort in most economical polisher in the market. Inquire of your dealer, or send 50 cents for sample size by mail to THE CHANDLER & RUDD COMPANY, CLEVELAND, OHIO, ESTABLI BENT & CO’S ed 1801, CELEBRATED EAND-MADE Water Crackers (The Only Genuine.) —anp— Fancy Biscuits, MILTON, MASS, House Heating. Did your furnace heat your house during the last severe winter ? OF COURSE IT DIDN'T. Now is the time to get estimates for the Heater and Gurney Hor Water RADIATORS. A pamphlet-book MAIN OFrice: 163 Franklin St., Boston. ANCHE “How Best to Heat Our Homes,” 71 sean riser’ Nee York. FREE ON APPLICATION, $7 Bo. Canal Birest, Ci 246 Arch Street, Philadeip! comicbooks.com