Life, 1891-04-23 · page 12 of 14
Life — April 23, 1891 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "The War Scare" Analysis This page features a humorous dialogue between two working-class New York characters—Gusty and Chimmie—discussing potential Italian military aggression. The satire targets public anxiety about foreign threats and the characters' limited understanding of geopolitics. The joke relies on ethnic stereotyping: "dagos" (a derogatory term for Italians) are portrayed as banana and peanut vendors. Chimmie's explanation of Italian military capability is absurdly backward—he notes that Governor's Island cannons "ain't to fire off" because they'd "bust," and assumes Italian warships are merely covered with "iron ticker." The humor culminates when Gusty's only concern is whether a banana vendor he wronged might report him to Italian generals during an invasion—reducing international conflict to petty local theft. The piece reflects early 20th-century American nativism and xenophobia, treating Italian immigrants as comic subjects while expressing vague anxieties about foreign military threats.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
260 TO THE GIRLS IN LIFE. OW perfect are the gowns you wear, Your figures how complete; How fincly moulded are your arms, How dainty are your feet. How clever, too, your speeches are, How quick your repartee, If only you could really talk, And teally would, with me. I do not like those fellows, though, You've with you all the time; They're dangerous rivals to the men, Whose only gift is rhyme. How quickly could we fall in love, And find a charming wife, If only girls we really know, Were like the girls in Lire! James G. Burnett. Abe Lowenstein; 1KE, YOU'R WASTEN THOT SEGAR! VHY DON'T YOU HOLT “IS THIS A DREAM?” IT IN YOUR MOUTH VHEN You LigHDT UT? Ske Lowenstein: HU! Do You THENK ME NOSE IS ASBESTOS ? THE WAR SCARE. © GAY, Chimmie,” said Gusty as he lighted a half-smoked cigarette he had picked up, and leaned his elbows on that step of the City Hall which happened to be above the one he was sitting on, ‘ what's dis place, Italy, the papers says is goin’ ter fight wid us?" “Ttaly.” replied Chimmie who was better read than Gusty, “ why, dat’s de place all de dagos comes from, If it wasn’t fer Italy we wouldn't have no bananas or peanuts or grind-organs.”” “Where is it? Isit furder away dan Coney Islan’ ?” “Coney Islan’? Well, I guess yes. It’s furder away dan Chicago—so fur away you haf to go dere in a boat.” “ Well, how's dey goin’ to fight us den? If dey sen’ any boats over here dem big cannons down on Guvnor's Islan’ would fill em full o” holes an’ sink 'em.” “ Dat shows all you know about it. Dem cannons ain't to fire off. Dey’re jus’ for show. If dey fired ‘em off dey'd bust. Besides dem boats what dey fight wid is covered all over wid iron ticker dan me fist. Dem cannons couldn't do nothin’ against ‘em.” Gusty was getting interested. ‘What's to keep de dagos from comin’ over here and doin’ jus’ what dey want to do, den?” he asked. “ Nathin,” replied Chimmie, whose powers of explanation always increased with Gusty’s interest.‘ Dey’d come over in dose boats an’ firea cannon at City Hallan’ kill Mayor Grant. Den dey’d kill all de coppers. Den de dago ginerals would come on shore an’ help demselves to whatever dey wanted. Dey'd go inter the candy stores an’ take all de candy dey wanted an’ not pay fer it. Dey'd go to de teatre and take de bes’ seats, becauze dere wouldn’t be no coppers to stop ‘em. See? Dey'd be de bosses 'o New York an’ dey'd kill anybody dey wanted to except de dagos what sells bananas an’ peanuts.” Gusty began to look disturbed. ‘ Say, Chimmie,” he said, “ you know de lame dago wot I swiped a banana off of yesterday?” “Yes,” replied Chimmie. “ D’you suppose he'd tell de dago ginerals about dat?" comicbooks.com