Life — March 13, 1890 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

156 THE DAY WE CELEBRATE. THE GAME. ET lovers praise St. Valentine, I sing of good St. Patrick ; Of whisky, brandy, gin and wine, And Paddy and his hat brick. OPEN POSTAL CARDS TO PROMINENT PERSONS. To the Czar of Russia. DEAR ALECK: Why don't you travel in Siberia incog.? Go along as a Nihilist, for instance, and get flogged to death and see how you like it, I make no charge for the suggestion. Affectionately, CARLYLE, To President Harrison, My pearest Benjy: You ask for advice as to the best way of getting rid of Wanamaker. Put a stamp on him and drop him in the New York Post-office box, addressed to yourself, You'll never see him again. How's infantile Mack ? Ever yours, Carty, To Mr. Thomas Platt, My own PLatTsy-Watsy: I do not think you would make much money as a horse-car conductor. It isn't so easy toknock down fairs as you think, Go to Washington and tell Harrison you want the surplus, He'll do whatever you teil him to, In great haste, Cc. SaitH. To John Wanamaker. Drout Joux: You area wit! I shall endeavor to sell your joke about the difference between your two shops. As I understand it, you want me to say ‘one is an M. Porium and the other isa P. Morium.” Shall I sign with your full name or your famous nom de plume, “Adi Thank you for the green engraving of Washington. 1 will stick it on to my very first letter to my best girl. Eternally thine, Cart. Sati. To Governor Hill. My BELoveD Davin: I have not been able to cure my own, The Seven Southerly Sisters may be able to help you. It is not an uncommon thing for one’s hair to be in the soup, so don't be down-hearted. Your true friend, CaRrLy: To Miss Susan B. Anthony. My DEAR Mi x: I must say I am surprised at your note. This is not leap year, and I am already en- gaged to more young ladies than I can ever hope to wed. Mayor Grant, Governor Hill and the King of Spain are free of entanglements, Why not apply to them ? Always your brother, cs. To Jay Gould. Dear Jay: Thank you for the wine. Iam afraid the case has been tampered with. The bottle I opened, last night was nine-tenths water. Yours gratefully, C. Suit, To Ward McAllister, My DEAR OLD MACK!: You are very kind. I should be pleased to have my name put up for admission to the 4oo. But what does it cost? Literature is a little dead just now, and I cannot afford to put more than half a million into affairs of this sort. My regards to our friend No. 263. When did 47 die ? Ever of thee, CARLYLE. comicbooks.com