Life, 1889-09-19 · page 13 of 18
Life — September 19, 1889 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Explanation for Modern Readers This page is primarily **satirical short humor pieces** rather than political cartoons. The jokes mock universal human folly: **Key humorous scenarios:** - A man marries solely to pay off debts using his bride's dowry - A poet obsesses over creditors while claiming he never thinks of tomorrow - A child interrupts prayer to fight his sister - A creditor tries flattery to be paid first, but Ricardo pays debts alphabetically—a joke about rational bureaucracy defeating emotional manipulation - An Irish policeman suggests letting a fatally wounded man rest so a non-fatal wound might heal **The satire targets:** debt and financial irresponsibility, pretentious poets, domestic annoyance, and absurd logic. These are timeless comedy subjects requiring no historical context. The remainder is **advertising**: insurance, perfume, hats, printing ink, and cigarettes—typical late 19th/early 20th-century magazine filler. The "WANTED" section seeks missing back issues of *Life* magazine itself.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
> LIFE: AT Sl SPR) Av WLLy A NICE DISTINCTION. DO do detest a man's that’s close, And furthermore, a day ; But if a pretty girl is close I feel the other way. —Grip. Arter the wedding ceremony a friend of the family took the father of the bride aside and whispered to him, **1 observe that you do not seem to be aware that your son-in-law is over head and ears in debt?” . “Are you sure?" “Certain; and I am convinced he has only married your daughter with the object of paying off his creditors with the dowry.” “Why did you not mention this before ?”” “+ He owes me five thousand reals."—Calendario Bilbaino, PosTMastER: The letter is too heavy; it wants another stamp. CouNTRYWoMAN ; Why, that will make it heavier still !—//umor= tstiha, MINISTERIAL FRIEND (on a visi): 1 wonder what makes your mamma so happy to-day ? She is singing around all over the house. Lite NELL: I dess she's thought of somfin’ to scold papa about when he comes home.— Philadelphia Record. 167 PexeLore: Ah! Mr, Villanelle, you poets are too careless, you have no thought of the morrow. Poet: Have no thought of the morrow! Great heavens! my board-bill is due to-morrow. If my thoughts of the morrow were worth money I would be rich.— Saturday Herald. Tue little boy was on his knees in his little night-dress saying his prayers and his little sister couldn't resist the temptation to tickle the soles of his little feet. He stood it as long as he could and then said: ** Please, God, excuse me while I knock the stuffing out of Nellie.” —San Francisco Chronicle, AFTER twenty years of loose living in Bohemian fashion, Ricardo comes in for a legacy of ten million reals. ++ Now's the time to pay off my creditors,” he exclaims. The latter begin to call upon him. One of them, all smiles and obsequiousness, remafks— «You see, I have not troubled you much, and therefore consider myself entitled to be paid before the rest.” “ICT rightly remember,” says Ricardo, “your name is Zoilo Zamora?” + Exactly 1" Then, my good friend, | am sorry to have to tell you that Iam paying my creditors in alphabetical order, so that it will not be your turn till last."— Afadrid Cémico, Sysratneric Citizen: Is he fatally wounded, do you think, officer ? Pouiceman: Two av the wounds is fatal, sor, but the thied is not, an’ if we can lave him rest quiet fora fwhile, I think he wud come around all right !—Grip. A Renewable Term Policy THE PROVIDENT SAVINGS LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY OF NEW YORK, UN VT bee Equitable Building, No. 120 Broadway, Is the safest, least expensive and fairest contract of life insurance in the market. One-half the rates usually charged. SHEPPARD HOMANS, President and Actuary. WM, E. STEVENS, Secretary. einer Houms, Coientss Send for Prospectus or call in person. ]Of Arabia can never sweeten your gloves, handkerchiefs, or sta- tionery so delightfully and permanently as the delicate Sachet powders prepared with the ut- most skill and care by Metcalf. Their pureand asting fragrance is a constant delight. One ounce sample glass jar lof Jockey Club, Helio- trope, or Violette, by mail, 2c. T. METCALF & CO. 139 Tremont St., Bost E. FOUGERA's CO., ‘New Youn, Sold by all Druggists, Nos. in good condition, All the Perfumes “Ap & € CELEBRATED HATS aND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., NEW YORK. WANTED: O and 16, Vol. I., of LIFE. The publishers of LIFE will pay $1.50 for every copy of Nos. 10 and 16, Vol. I., of LIFE, providing they are ADDRES Publishers of LIFE, 28 West 23d Street, ). Old Bore : YOUR ALPHARET Johnny: Wuat’s THAT? 0. B.: Wu, pon't you A.B.C.? Johnny: Ol, YES; AND BESIDES THAT WE BAT IT, O. B.: Eat ttt Johnny: Ww AT the bedside of a dying man, a priest is offering him the last consolatio: ** Be brave, my friend. Death is not so ter- rible, afterall. Think that you will soon be with’ your good father, your mother, your wife— “Ah, father, it is just that that makes me dread the end."—La Caricature. “Wuat formation is the rock in the well- known compound rock and rye?” asked Knoggs. “T'should say it was quartz.” said Boggs. ‘Some think it gneiss,” said Foggs. ‘It's a trap,” said Knoggs.—Detrott Jour- nal. WELL, MY Boy, DO You Kxow > KNOW YOUR 14 Chestoat St., Phila. How bo you po THAT? B, C. OATMEAL, N. Y. SULLIVAN, POWELL & CO., LONDON. ORIENTAL CIGARETTES. GEO. MATHER’S SONS RINTING INK 60 JOHN STREET, N. Y, THIS PAPER IS PRINTED WITH OUR SPECIAL - LIFE + INK. The cigarettes manufactured by this firm possess the great advantage of all being hand-made, of the choicest and most fragrant Oriental To- baccos, and rolled in paper of the finest quality. To be had of all first-class dealers, or of the sole agents. DRUMMOND & FISKE, 24,State Street, New York City.. SAMPLES AND PRICES ON APPLICATION. comicbo: oks.com