Life, 1889-07-04 · page 13 of 20
Life — July 4, 1889 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two distinct satirical pieces: **"Too Much of a Denial"** (bottom): A brief joke about a job applicant claiming he's always been slow, even as a boy—the humor lies in his inadvertent admission that he's been a failure his entire life. **"St. Peter at the Gate"** (right column): A longer dialogue satirizing modern society, particularly women's values. An applicant seeks heavenly entry by citing trivial "good deeds" (staying awake listening to gossip, keeping dance dates). St. Peter grows suspicious about modern novels—implying they promote questionable morality. The punchline: the woman is admitted to heaven specifically because she *refused* to marry an English duke solely for his title/wealth. This inverts contemporary expectations, suggesting most women would accept such a match. The satire critiques both materialism and the "modern" literature allegedly encouraging it. **Four animal illustrations** (left): Appear to show a separate comic strip featuring anthropomorphic animals in conversation, though context is unclear without captions. The page reflects early 20th-century American anxieties about women's changing values and "modern" literature's influence.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
RS. PANCAKE (¢o ¢ramp): Go away there! I don’t want any wood chopped, nor any carpets beaten, nor anything else! TRamMP: Be jabers, mum, thin it’s just the roight house Oi'm sthrikin’, mum. It’s only beggin’ Oi am. 1 LIFE: 13 APPLICANT: Oh, yes; always, rain or shine. St. PETER (suddenly suspictous): Did you ever write a modern society novel ? APPLICANT: No, I never did. know. Sr. PETER: H'm, it’s not wisdom that goes into them. Can you recall any especial acts of goodness on your part? APPLICANT (thoughtfully): 1 kept awake half one night once while an engaged girl was telling me about her fiancé. St. PETER: That was kind. APPLICANT: I always kept my dancing engagements even when the best man asked me last. ST. PETER: That was unusual, certainly. APPLICANT: And at college balls I used to affect real interest in what the seniors were saying to me. ST. PETER (who had been gradually widening the open- zng): We needn't go much further. Were you engaged to be married ? APPLICANT: Yes, Sr. PETER: Englishman, I suppose? APPLICANT: No, an American. I refused an English- man, though. St. PETER: Ah! He was a commoner, I suppose? APPLICANT: No, he was a duke. Sr. PETER (gasping): What! you refused an English peer? APPLICANT: I did not love him. St. PETER (throwing the gate wide open): My dear, walk right in. The next young woman from the side streets who comes up here, will have to make a very good showing to get by. I was not very wise, you M.-H. Welch. TOO MUCH OF A DENIAL. oe OU'RE rather too old to take in as an office-boy,” said Wiggins, as he eyed the applicant. “You must have lived pretty fast to be at the bottom of the lad- der at your age.” “No indeed, sir,” returned the other, earnestly, “ I'm just as slow as I ever was while a boy!” comicbooks.com