Life — April 4, 1889 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: $PI9§ORS AT NVLLy A HERO. WE, know a man, a brave, true hero, Who, when the mercury drops to ‘zero, Will hold ‘the babe, as few men could, So that his wife can split the wood. Huseann (starting): Isn't that a rap at the door? You had had better go for it, darling. Wire: Yes, sent C. O. D.— Texas Siftings. CourtLy GextLeman: May I ask if you were present at the creation ? ELDERLY MAIDEN (Olushing with guich indignation): Sir? 1 do not understand what you mean. CourTLy GENTLEMAN Wednesday.— Lowell Citizen. Younc WaIter (af a medical dinner) : Them doctors use a lot of wine, but I s'pose they kin stand it. OLD Waiter: Dunno about that. pretty tight already. They don’t look so. “| No ; but they're begi Maximom Security. / Minimom Cast. THE PROVIDENT SAYINGS LIFE ASSURANCE SOCIETY, 120 Broadway, New York (EQUITABLE BUILDING), in’ to agree. will give you double the amount of in- surance that you can obtain for the same money from any of the old companies. Avoids the unnecessarily high cost of level premium life insurance and the insecurity and uncertainty of assessment insurance. SHEPPARD HOMANS, President and Actuary. WM. E, STEVENS, Secretary. Send for Prospectus or call in person. IMERICAN (YCLES AUSTYLES & 0 ILLUSTRATED Git CATALOGUE ON APPLICATION Y CormutiysJeFrERY MFC (0 CHICAGO, ILLINOIS. Ir is decidedly in bad taste to bite your friend's diamond scarf-pin in a horse-car to see if the stones are real.— Jeweller’s Weekly. Nothing, ma'am; nothing. wished to inquire if you attended the oratorio by the Choral Society I'm thinkin’ they're gettin’ Philadelphia Record, murder, them ? crime.” Yes, crime.” “Good! — Texas Siftings. ened criminal,” I had it color don't suit me. Isaacs seven und a halluf. CUSTOMER: Isaac: I simply First Detective: I've It's vaded and der golor don't suit you. 203 fot the two men who committed that Their names are Chinks and Kinks, Seconp DeTtEcTIVE: You don’t say so! How did you discover “I ran across Chinks one day, and charged him with the How did he take it?” “He changed color—a sure sign that he is guilty.” “* True—and the other ?” “1 saw Kinks soon after, and boldly charged him with the How did he act?" “He did not change color at all— London Tit-Bits, CusToMER : I tell you I don’t want the coat. sure sign that he is a hard- It's faded and the Vell take it for es, its half worn out already. : So much der better, ma shild, id von't dake you so long to vear it out. TeacueR: Can you tell me the population of Wurtemberg ? If der goat don’t suit yer Hast du geschen ?—America, First SCHOLAR : 1,881,506. else know? TEACHER: Very good; still not quite correct. Does anybody SECOND SCHOLAR : 1,881,505. That's right! Fir CELEBRATED HATS AND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut St., Phila. JOHN PATTERSON & CO., Tailors and Importers, Patterson Building, Nos. 25 and 27 W. 26th St., NEW YORK, Meh’ Ls Cl 7 APPLETON MANUFACTURERS OF GRACFULDESIGNS ++ SOLID (ONSTRUCTION + MATHLESS TONE + - BEAUTIFUL FINISH, Scvotar: Why, I know that ; but as we got a little sister yesterday, I thought it would make one more.-- Fuiegende Blatter. THE CHEQUE BANK, LIMITED. Estantisen in Lonpox, 1873. CHIEF OFFICE, 4 Waterloo Place, Pall Mall, London. TRUSTEES: ‘The Right Honorable JOHN BRIGHT, M.P., The Right Honorable EARL BEAUCHAMP, Vankers;: Bank of England, ‘The Capital of the Bank and its Guarantee Fund of so per cent, is invested in Government Securities. ‘The Bank does not discount Notes of Bills, nor speculate, but loans its Deposits against Govern- ment Securities, thus mal the Cheque Bank Cheques EQUAL TO CASH—as fiank of Eng- land Notes and are cheaper than Postal Orders. The Cheque Rank issues Cheques singly or in books, from ONE POUND upw: of Travelers, and for others remi Europe, available in every town in E s land, Ireland and Wales. In every town of Europe, and all other parts of the world. Cheque Bank Cheques are accepted as Cash by all the British Government Offices. VISITORS TO THE PARIS EXHIBI- TION this summer can get Cheque Bank Cheques cashed at seventy Banking Houses in Paris, Travelers and others holding Cheque Hank Cheques can have their mail matter addressed to them, care of the Cheque Hank, London, who will take charge of the same and forward to any address. For Hand-Rook containing List of upwards of 2000 of the principal Ranking Houses throughout the World who Cash the Cheque Bank Cheques, and for all information, apply to E. J. MATHEWS & CO., Agents, 2 Wall St., New York. REFERENCES BY PERMISSION. JNO. W. MACKAY, Esq., President Commercial Cable Company, Mackay-Beanett Cab! ¥: F.O. FRENCH, Esq , President Manhattan Trust Co., New York, and others. DECORATION Furniture Curtains 133 FIFTH AVE. NEW YORK ROUX & CO. comicbooks.com