Life — December 27, 1888 — page 36: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

20 -LIFE- AT THE CLUB RECEPTION. LINES TO LALAGE. (Est (to guiet man in dress suit): That's a charm- Since Horace, in your beauty’s praise, ing morceau; by Tosti, is it not? I haven't much © Sweet one of bygone Roman days, of an ear for music. Attuned his skillful lyre, Quiet MAN (looking at the buffet): No, sit; that was So many years have slipped away, got up by Pinard. Lunch'll be served at 10.30, sir. You're but a memory to-day, Although you did inspire The muse of him whose nimble wit HIS REASONS. Maccena’s eye with laughter lit. Ove of our Hibernian police was taking in a refractory prisoner, whom he had pounded until he was out of You ask why I invoke your name— | breath, and then attempted to reason with him as follows : Who, int ¢ of prosal aim, “It is not because I hates you I bates you, but because I ___ The tripping iambs rhyme? | have the authority to do so.” Forsooth, because a modern maid Is fonder of the lyre that played In your Augustan time Than any strain that I may sing, Whate'er the changes that I ring. LOGICAL. *€ Moy!” “Mum?” “Stop that noise! Do you want to deafen us? y pale! And so I've deemed, perchance, if I “Yes'm; then you won't mind the noise.” Should hymn your praise and sadly sigh That I did not exist HAT is the difference between the manner of your When you in blooming beauty trod wife when you come home late from the club, and Some Roman garden's dewy sod, the man who tells your creditor that you are able to pay him ? I might her thought enlist, ats 5 ; S ; - Who pours into my envious ear The former is a lawful ire, while the latter is an awful liar. tee pete lhe ie pa That ‘* Horace is an awful dear! “TCHE following sign stands in front of a market in Scran- Now, don’t be jealous, will you, pray? ton, Pa.: It's only her provoking way, And I am quite inclined To think that when, at your fair shrine She sees me offering many a line, She'll change her wayward mind, And tread upon a different track— Then you can have your Horace back! Bissell Clinton. “CHICKENS ALIVE AND DRESS! THE GLASS OF FASHION. fs H," said Mr. Scourplate grimly, as he adjusted his necktie, “ We ‘ave to put hup with the airs of these society people hall day; but when evenink comes, me boy, they show wot the truly genteel is by puttink on the dress that we wear all day!" “That's so,” replied Mr. Crumbcloth, with a grave nod; “You ‘ave a great ‘ead, Tummus; we waiters be the real leaders of fashion.” “cc HEN I was in England,” remarked Chinner, “I saw the crack drum-and-fife corps of the country, led by the Earl of Fife himself.” OUNG HOPEFUL: Papa, the prefix “ trans" means across, doesn’t it ? OLD. HOPEFUL (delightedly): Yes, my son; as in trans- atlantic, which means across the Atlantic. YouNnG HOPEFUL: Well, then, transparent means a Whom THE GODS LOVE DYE YOUNG. cross parent, doesn’t it ? comicbooks.com sti