Life — October 11, 1888 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: SPISSORS AT NLL NEW RELATIVES. ROM the seaside and the mountains, Back to town they throng once more These young men who've gained a “siste That they never had before. — Puck. Mrs. NeEWTIDE ; Turn around fora side view, Rupert. I'm mak- ing a little sketch to send mamma, and want you in the foreground. Mr. NEwTIDE (with alacrity ashe remembers the arrangements Sor mamma's future abiding place): Fire away, my dear! It’s prob- ‘ably my last chance.— 7ime. Scese—Top of Loch Maree coach ; vehicle is approaching Tala- dale. Tourist (to driver) : Splendid country this. Driver: Ay, ay! Ant you'll have peen here pefore ? Tourist: Oh. yes; several times ! Driver: Ay, ay! There's nopody effer comes here tat hasna’ peen here sometime pefore already.—London Tit-Bits. AT drill a soldier spits in the ranks, SERGEANT OF MANG-UVRES (indignantly): The fellow that spat, four days in the guard-house. There shall be no spitting in the ranks, We are not in a parlor here |—Fliegende Blatter. 209 ETHEL (shuddering): How the trees moan and sigh to-night ! Boney (speaking wher eof he knows): Well, 1 guess you'd moan and sigh if you were as full of green apples as they be.—Binghamton Republican. “Is there going to be any music at the church festival to-night ?” asked Snooks of the pastor. ‘I do not know,” responded that digni- tary, who had been many times snubbed by the leader—'* I do not know ; but the choir will sing !"— Afusical Herald. Tue engagement of Miss Nora Cogan to Mr. Rhinelander De Lancey is announced. Miss Cogan is engaged as cook for $20 a month.—Sun, PROFESSOR OF CHEMISTRY : Gentlemen, I hold in my hand a vial of soda, What chemical shall I combine with it to produce a valuable article of commerce ? Goopsny (waking uf): Br-r-randy !—/udge. * Jou, what would you do if I were to die?” “Bury you, my dear."—7he Cartoon, HoTeEt CLerk: H. and M. man, I see; might get you a bet or two, Otp Gent: No, sir-ee; C. and T. every time, red bandanna an’ all. HoTet CLerK: But you're all covered over with protection buttons, sir. OLb'GeNT: Well, by Jinks, that comes from being near-sighted, Wife said she'd bought some buttons of a man in the street awful cheap, an’ if she hasn't gone and sewed "em on to my last year's over- coat!’ Her blasted economy is always comin’ in in the wrong way. —Harfer's Weekly. ~ ~ Smooth, | Soft and Elastic Skin. Fine Texture CELEBRATED HATS AND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., Packer's Tar Soap removes impairments of the skin, and establishes in their stead that health- fol, brilliant. natural cuticle which must be the basis of all Beautiful Complexions. NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. JOHN PATTERSON & CO., Tailors and Importers, Patterson Building, PERFUMES and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., Nos. 25 and 27 W. 26th St., NEW YORK. “ANNOUNCEMENT. IRRAKAVER, LADIES’ TAILOR, 19 East 21st St., N. Y. 2d door East from Broadway. With a view of advancing the very liberal patronage accorded to my Specialty, I would inform patrons and the discriminating classes, that on return from my annual visit to the most noted European Centres of Fashion and Marts of Choicest Goods, I am now prepared fo show designs and models in Wraps, Gowns, Jackets and styles which cannot be ouf- matched by any one in my line. 914 Chestnut St., Phila, Perfumery Guerlain. THE BEST. Most Delicate. Most Lasting. Sold by PAKK & TILFORD AND ALL FANCY GOODS DEALERS. EDENIA Goya Lily. PIANOS CC.BRIGGS &C2 5 APPLETON ST. BOSTON MASS. MANUFACTURERS OF GRACFULDESIGNS ++ SOLID (NSTRUCTION MAT(HLESS TONE + - BEAUTIFUL FINISH, comicbooks.com