Life, 1888-06-14 · page 13 of 16
Life — June 14, 1888 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Life Magazine Page 343 This page contains multiple brief humorous anecdotes typical of late 19th-century American satirical magazines, plus period advertisements. The cartoons/jokes mock various social types: a lovesick pharmacist, an opportunistic bachelor revisiting an old rejection, and a burglar's candid admission that he works "in the dark" out of necessity—a play on criminal necessity rather than moral darkness. The "Don't be a clam" editorial defends clams against being used as insults, noting they commit no human vices. Other brief pieces include a German-accented jeweler convinced a musician needs a precise watch, and mathematicians discussing problem-solving. The bulk of the page comprises advertisements for period goods: fountain pens, ladies' hats, perfume, patent medicines, summer clothing, shoe polish, and candy—typical commercial content filling space in magazines of this era. The humor relies on wordplay, ethnic dialect comedy (the German jeweler), and social observation now dated but recognizable to contemporary readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LITTLE RHODA‘S BAD HABIT. THE drug clerk in the village store Sot mashed on little Rhoda, Who came in almost every day To bi-carbonate of soda.— Telegram. Mk. SLIMBRAIN (fishing for a compliment): Bobby, what did your sister say when she heard that I was going to stay to supper again to-night ? Bony : Let me see—oh, yes! she said Mr. Slimbrain must think we keep an hotel.— Texas Si/tings, Coxrirstp BACHELOR : How time does fly, Miss Seaside! Why, it was ten years ago that you refused me on this very spot. Miss SeasipE (tho wishes she hadn't) : So long agoas that! I was very young and foolish then, Mr. Smith. CONFIRMED BACHELOR: But we are both older and wiser now, n'est-ce pas ?—Harvard Lampoon. “My poor man,” said the sympathetic visitor to the convicted burglar, ‘I pity rather than blame you. If you had had the advan- tages other men have had your career might have been so different | You were reared amid scenes of vice and have passed your life in moral darkness—is it not so?” “TT can't deny it, mum,” replied the burglar, “I've allus been obleeged to do most of my work in the dark."—Chtcogo Tritune, 343 sr be a clam" is a warning that meets one very frequently nowadays, Well, why not? What's the matter with aclam? He's all right. If he fulfills his mission and makes the most of himself, what more could be expected and what more does any person do } The clam is as well born, as well bred and as respectable as the oyster, yet nobody thinks Of speaking disrespectfully of the oyster. What'bas the clam done that it should be made a term of derision > Nobody ever heard of a clam getting drunk, lying, cheating at cards, abusing dumb animals, putting a little dog's eyes out, or doing any of the thousand things by which men distinguish themselves from brutes. The clam is yet to be heard from. Perhaps he would say, “Don’t be a man,"—/ndianapolis Journal. Vat is your professin, my vrendt?” asked a jeweler of a pro- spective customer. “Tam a musician,” was the reply. “A musician, Ah, my tear sir, dot vatch is shust vat you vant in your bisnis. Dot vas der fery ding for a musician, I don't see how you haf got along so vell midout it all dis time.” *T don't see what good the old watch is to a musician,” “You don't? Vell, you yust wait and see vat perfect time dot vatch keeps. Perfect time, und all you've got to do in your bisnis is shust to look oud for der tune.—Aer chant Traveller. First MATHEMATICIAN: I have already worked three days on one formula without finding the right solution. SECOND MATHEMATICIAN : Now, pow; only industry. Columbus's egg did not fall on the table in one day.—Fviegende Blatter. FRAULEIN (entre deux ages): | have made one firm resolution— never to marry. . ; Herr: O, gnadiges Fraulien, you are goodness itself !—Fliegende Blatter, EVERY ONE SHOULD TRY CELEBRATED HATS ax ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts. and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., MEW YoRK. ot4 Chestnat St., Phila 12 Selected Samples for trial, post-paid, on receipt of ten cents, Ask for Perry's Planished Pens. TVISON, BLAKEMAN & CO., 7 *355"9o2"""- ‘You can live at homeand make more money at wer’ for ue than at anything e'se (n the world. Bither sex :all agua, Crate LADIES’ Palmer House, Chicago. LADIES’ TAILOR, 19 Bast 24st Street, NEW YORK, AND Bellevue Avenue, NEWPORT, - K. L., Invites inspection of his fresh _Importations for SUMMER WEAR, Selected forhighest-class. requirements, My new Ridipg-Habit Skirt, Cuton entirely new prin- ciples, is exceptionally LUNDBOKG'S PERFUMES make appro- priate and acceptable gifts. | They are pot up ta neat attractive packages of various styles, and are for sale by all dealers. LADD & COFFIN, PROPRIETORS AND MANUFACTURERS, 24 BARCLAY STREET, NEW YORK. Burlington Route C.0.AQ RR COLORADO Offers the most attractions to Summer resorters. See your own country before going abroad. Fine shooting, excellent fishing, magnificent scenery, and charming climate. Only one change of cars, and but 58 hours from New York to Denver. For full information address E. J. SWORDS, 317 Broadway, N. Y. H. D. BADGLEY, 306 Washington St., Boston, of PAUL MORTON, Gen'l Pass. Agent, Chicago. neat, close-fitting, grace- ful and comfortable. LADIES | Kee year shoes looking clean. § newand natural. Raven Gloss will do it. It contains oil and may be applied every day, if desired, without the slightest injury to the leather. Is economical and the best. Allow no sub- stituting. For sale everywhere. BUTTON & OTTLRY, Mfrs., 71 Barclay St.,N. Y. ANDY by Mallt.—Send §1 oo for box of delicious Chocolate Cream Drops, Caramels, or very fine Mixed Candy, PECK & Co., 33 Water St., N. ¥. comicbooks.com