Life — December 1, 1887 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

: AT PRS AT NvLLy HOW THEY DO IT IN BOSTON. THE modern girl doesn’t give herself away when she allows herself to be wooed and won. She compels her adoring swain to sur- render himself. Per example, says the Boston Transcript : He put on his hat, started slowly for the door, hesitated, came back, sighed deeply, and took the lily-white hand in his own and pressed it to his lips. “Katie,” he murmured, ‘I have waited long—oh, how long !—for this opportunity. Will you, Kate, will you, darling, be mine 2” “Henry,” she replied, with a look half of sorrow and half of deter- mination, ‘it can never be. “Never be! Oh, why have you permitted me to hope? Why have you encouraged me, only to stamp upon my bleeding heart at last 2" lam sorry, Henry, but I can never be yours. I have other jects in view.” “Other objects 2” “Yes, Henry; I cannot consent to belong to any man. that you shall be mine.” I intend “ How is your son getting along in New York, Mr. Hayseed ?” “«T guess he ain't doin’ as well as he says he is. He was home vother day and had on a colored shirt an’ a white collar. [-rayther suspect he's behind with his washerwoman,”—Marfer’s Bazar. 311 LOSES STRENGTH IN TRANSLATION, AN American joke sometimes loses itself through translation into another language. A native humorist wrote : “ Notwithstanding that a lady should always be quiet and self- contained, she cannot even enter a place of worship without a tre- mendous bustle.” A French writer reproduces it in this form : “According to an American author, the ladies of that country are so greedy of notoriety that they cannot enter the holy sanctuary with- out disturbing the kneeling worshippers with their vulgar and unseem- ingly ado."—Binghamton Republican. TH FOLLIES OF MEN, THE wise old Comtesse de used to remark that there were three follies of men which always amazed her. The first was climbing trees to shake fruit down, when if they waited long enough the fruit would fall of itself, The second was going to war to kill one another, when if they only waited they would ail die naturally. The third was that they should run after women, when if they refrained from doing so the women would be sure to run after them.— Voltaire. De Lessers now believes that the Panama canal will be open by 1890 oF 1980, he isn't sure which,—Omaha World. MR, HOWELLS'S OPINION, RerorTER: Mr. Howells, whom do you consider the greatest modern writer of fiction ? Mk. HOWELLS (a/fer a moment's thought): The Russian novelist, Tolstoi— REPORTE! Thanks, Mr. Howells; good morning. Mr. HoweLts (hastily): Beg pardon; but I had not finished. 1 was about to say that Tolstoi is the second greatest novelist.—/'ucd. Pune Some Another, NDOS ESTABLISHME % MArcHes Any Coton 17 Temple Place, Boston, and Cor. Fifth Ave. and West 14US¢ NY | Palmer House, Chicago. CELEBRATED HATS ann LADIES' ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., NEW YoRK. 9t4 Chestaut St., Phila. | IERAKAVER LADIES’ TAILOR, Habit Maker and Hatter, NEW YORK, 19 East 21st St., 2d door East of Broadway LONDON, Ny JAMES PILE & CO. Lundbords Perfurne GEO. MATHER’S SONS RINTING INK 60 JOHN STREET, N. Y. yy THIS PAPER IS PRINTED WITH OUR SPECIAL + LIFE + INK. 288-290 Kegent St. NEWPORT, 176 Bellevue Ave. EDENIA. Lundbord’s Rhenish Cologne. REGA TTA SILKS FOR SALE BY LEADING HOUSES, EEE CROSBY’S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. Strengthens the intellect, restcies lost functions, builds up worn-out nerves, promotes good digestion, cures all weaknesses and nervousness. 36 Wast asrw Srassr, New Your. For Sate av Druccists, on Mam. $1.00, comicbooks.com