Life — August 4, 1887 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

T $2S00RS AT NLL GETTING EVEN. HE was one of these lofty, approach-me-not sort of girls, born with a silver spoon in her mouth, and indignant to this day because it wasn't pure gold. Billy Bliven had just been introduced to her at a lawn fete, and was doing his best, in his plain matter-of-fact way, to make himself agreeable. After they had chatted a few minutes on the veranda, Bill concluded that he would like to know her better, so he came at the subject thus wise : “1 should greatly —1—I should like very much to cal on you some evening. Suppose I drop around and we go out and take a little walk. “Thanks,” she said stiffly ; 1 am no pedestrian.” Billy pondered a little while and then remarked in a quiet way peculiar to himself, “*I'd have asked you to go out riding, only I knew you were no jockey."—AMerchant Traveler. Jack: Ah, Miss Kate, it's the little things that tell, Miss Kate: Yes; little brothers and sisters.—.Vew/ort News, A TIME-WORN TOT. SMELT WORKS WONDERS, “CHICAGO capitalists are about to start smelt works at Eau Claire,” says a despatch. Well, what in the name of heaven are “smelt works?” Is ita glae factory, or a bone boiling establishment ? These are all the ‘smelt works" we have in Milwaukee, Eau Claire is a beautiful clean city, and any man caught establishing smelt works there ought to be pulled by the police.—Pech's Sun, Mrs, De Society : What a lovely great big baby that is we just sed, MRS. De Fasition : Yes; it is mine. Indeed !" “Oh, I'm sure of it, I recognized the nurse."—Omaha World. *How is the work progressing in Dakota?” asked a Boston minister of a good brother at the Baptist anniversary the other day. “Well, I am getting along pretty well; but still it's rather dis- couraging. The first week I went there I had big congregations. One day there were one hundred and fifty down on their knees weeping and praying. A man came in and said there were two detectives coming down the road, and every blessed person got up and skipped.” —AMinneapolis Journal. “1 DECLARE,” Snickerson i Harper's Bazar. said “Mrs. Spinkinwither, ‘what a gadder Mrs. 1 never go on the street without seeing her!"— THE CHURCH NAP, “And now,” concluded the clergyman after a long discourse, we have seen that millions ‘on millions of people have been benefited by following this Scriptural injunction.” Just then Lawyer Stubbs woke aa enough to sa manner, *' Move that the injunction be made permanent. “How old are you, my son ? who was celebrating his birthday. I'm mighty glad of it: * Letsure Hours, asked an old gentleman of a * tot” “I'm four," was the reply, ‘and I was gelting very tired of being three all the in a sleepy Judge. FRAKAVER, LADIES’ TAILOR, Habit Maker and Hatter, * Bellevue Ave., Newport AND 9) 19 East 2{st St., N.Y. COPYRIGHTED, Wes are d hice who ceed join in the chars CELEBRATED HATS Mama tried all the me id and, 0 she knows its the best. LADIES' ROUND HATS. Anne lh with seagt hen arena ©, 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., “The Ladies’ Favorite.” Porifyins Emallcat A luxury for shamprong. Gores suis and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., 0. NEW YORK. Diseases. THE PACKER MFC Palmer House, Chicago, 914 Chestnut St., Phila. 100 Fulton St., New Var Lundborgs Perfume EDENIA. Lundbord's Rhenish Cologne. XIMBALL'S SATIN iN Bie iralght Cat gaat People of refined taste who AYER desire exceptionally fine cig- arettes should use only our ‘Straight Cut, put up in satin packets and boxes of tos, 208, $08, and 1008. 14 Prise Medals. WM. S, KIMBALL & CO. SPENCERIAN 26 SELECTED PENS | ST EEL Pp ENS | Ivison, Blakeman & Co. SENT FOR TRIAL, POST PAID, ‘753 & 755 Broadway, TWENTY-FIVE CTS. | |Are the Best. NEW YORK CROSBY’S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. Strengthens the intellect, restores lost functions, builds up worn-out nerves, promotes good digestion, cures all weaknesses and nervousness. 56 Wast ssw Srazet, New Yorx. For Sats sv Davoaisrs, om Mar, §1.00, Riding Habits cut on new safety principles. Braided Gowns, Coats, Jackets and Ulsters in original desigos. Riding Hats from the lead ing London Manufacturers, comicbooks.com