Life — July 28, 1887 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HER FIRST THIS SEASON. «4 TELL me," he whispered with the hoarseness of emotion, whis- pered as if he feared the murmuring surf might catch the question and bear it to some other ears, “Tell me, have you ever loved ?” She trembled. She hesitated fora moment, and he thought he felt her blushes glow into his eyes. She trembled, and in a still, soft whisper, gentle as the summer breeze, answered : “Not this summer."—San Francisco Chronicle. THINGS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE LEFT UNSAID, **You remember that party at Madam Gelasma’s, to hear Joachim, stein, and the Henschels, and De Soria—quite a smaé/’ party >” No; T wasn't there !” “No? Ah—well—it was very select !"—Punch, NO WONDER IT FAILED, It is claimed now that the telephone was invented in 1635. It did not come into general use, however, because the word ‘thello” was not invented until some years after. If you will try ita few times you will understand why it is impossible to run the telephone by saying ‘* Prithee, friend,” or Odd boddikins, man,” or “Give thee good morning, sirrah.”” No wonder the telephone’ was a faiture.— Burdette. 55 ALMIGHTY ANDOVER, St. Peter: Who knocks? HeatHen: One whom the missionary has snatched from the burning, St. Peter: What missionary ? HEATHEN: One from Andover, Mass, Sr. PeTeR: Please take a seat for a while on the brush heap to the left of the gate. I can't tell until the Andover controversy is settled whether you are saved or damned,—Aacon Telegraph, My four-year-old boy remarked confidentially to the cook the other day that he * would hate to be a chicken.” “Why, Rob?” ‘'Cause I would have to lay eggs, and I don't know how,"'was the response. —"' High Chair Philosophy," in Babyhood, “ Another mine gone to the wall,” said a gentleman standing on the sidewalk to a friend, as a lawyer who is interested in iron mining stock was passing. ‘* What mine is that ?” asked the lawyer.‘ Kal somine,” answered the old joker, as he dodged behind a cigar sign, while the lawyer went off, looking over his shoulder, mad enough to fight.—Peca's Milwaukee Sun, He was an artist, courting the daughter of a sea captain, While he was whispering soft nothings in her ear in the parlor, he was par- alyzed by the harsh voice of the ancient mariner in a neighboring room, “Cast off that painter!” But she explained that her father often’ used nautical phrases in his sleep, and the engagement pro- ceeded to a finish.—Cafe Ann Advertiser, COULDN'T FIND HIS HOU: Bevaten INERRIATE: I shay, stranger ! Soner Party: Well, what do you want ? Inemetate:: Can't you help a genle (Arc) man find a housh that'll fit thish (hic) lach-key ?— Texas Si/tings. To Tourists, Travelers and Sportsmen. ABSENCE from home always brings its annoy- ances, especially in the matter of insuring a supply of clean linen. The simplest way to secure this, and to feel that a fresh and spotless collar or pair of cuffs is always available, is to keep a supply of what are called “LINENE™ goods. They are comfortable and genteel, and their many advantages are obvious to the experienced traveler. While it is not our desire to sell the LINENE goods direct to the consu- mer, weshall at any time be most happy to send samples. A sample collar and pair of eufisis sent to any address on receipt of six cents, when goods can- not be obtained elsewhere. Illustrated Catalogue free. Address the REVERSIBLE COLLAR CO., 27 Kilby Street, - - LADIES’ Boston, Mass, Lundbords Perfume GEREN EArs ~~ S Lundborgs Rhenish Cologne. covvnienrua, | CELEBRATED HATS AND ROUND HATS. NN | 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., \\ and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. UNKNOWN WRITERS! Send us good, original stories and poem: my -90D ‘rf MORES. WHitTEMOTS FOE DRESSING |Asit wilt NOTINJURE them CROSBY’S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. IKRAFAVER, LADIES’ TAILOR, Habit Maker and Hatter, foen Bellevue Ave., ; Newport AND 19 East 24st St., N.Y. 914 Chestaut St., Phila et One f Riding Habits cut on new y safety principles. Braided Gowns, ‘Coats, Jackets and Uliters in orginal designs, Riding Hats from the lead- ing London Manufacturers. thw EDENIA. (esses XIMBALL'S SATIN Straight Cut Cigarettes. People of refined taste who desire exceptionally fine cig- arettes should use only our Straight Cut, put up in satin packets and boxes of 10s, 208, $08, andr00s, 14 Prise Medals. WM.S, KIMBALL & CO. out? SHOES. vs | Strengthens the intellect, restores lost functions, builds up worn-out nerves, promotes good digestion, cures all weaknesses and nervousness. 36 Wast estw Sraget, New York. For Satz sy Drvccists, om Mam, $1.00, “i av, comicbooks.com