Life — June 16, 1887 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LI «¢ PORT." during the week, has neither languished nor slept, in fact the events of the last seven days have been both numerous and of great variety, but unfortunately our energetic and able horse- | reporter has been drawn on the Sharp jury, and we have been com- pelled to call upon the gentleman who usually writes up camp- meetings and supplies us with theological points to “do” the turf, the diamond, the tennis field and the regattas. Being rather new at this class of work, instead of following the time-honored custom of calling around him the trusty ‘' Spirit,” Forest and Stream and Ama- teur Athlete, and gleaning from their friendly columns the-desired | information, he adopted the extraordinary method of actually jun- keting about the suburbs of,New York and reporting the various | events in person. Unfortunately, as he has just departed for Bloomingdale, and his | notes are in rather a mixed-up condition, we will not, out of respect for his memory and consideration for our readers, give more than a few excerpts from his report. It is apparent that he hunted the National Game and corralled it | down in the domain of Erastus Wiman, for the following entry appears in his diary : «¢ EIRST DAY—Was told they played baseball at St. George's, but could not believe that the sacred edifice could be so profaned. Visited Stuyvesant Square, and found the church doors closed and sexton away. and had better go down to Staten Island. Accordingly, went there. Field with high fence. Large congregation present. Very disorderly. Game utterly incomprehensible. Met two very nice, respectable gen- tlemen who offered to explain it to me, and we went outside to a quiet corner behind the fence. They showed me three cards, which they said were meant to represent the three principal player: to try to pick out the card with one spot on it. After vainly striving, to understand the game, was informed I owed them eight dollars, but I objected, . . . The policeman who picked me up said I was ‘ pardl- yzed.’ Must have had some kind of a‘ stroke,’ for Iam badly bruised, and my watch is gone. 1 was «¢ GECOND DAY—Think I can understand horse-races better than baseball. Went to Jerome Park. (N.B.—It is not a park at all —no asphalt paths, no fountains, no ‘ keep off the grass’). Got a goo? position next the fence on the road where the horses were to run, and took out my diary to take notes. Policeman said I was a ‘ book- maker,’ and hauled me before a magistrate, who committed me to a cell until the next morning. I was then examined, and affirmed that I knew nothing of bookbinding or publishing, but acknowledged that I was shareholder in the ‘ Baptist Book Concern’ and a life membe: of the ‘Tract Society.’ Was released, but treated with much con- tumely and disrespect «¢ THIRD DAY—Went to Yonkers to report tennis match. Beau tiful day ; pleasant place of meeting and quite a large congrega- tion, Found a picturesque, ivy-clad stone wall on which to sit beneath i tree, and watch the service of the tennis players. Sun very hot, wall growing harder, feel very badly hands and face much inflamed, druggist agrees with doctor that it must have been poison ivy on the wall. «¢ FOURTH DAY—Hardly able to move, but must go down the Bay on steamboat to Atlantic Regatta, Upper deck good place to see from. Too much motion, however—will try lower deck. Very rough on lower deck, think I will retire to cabin, Head aches from blow Choir-boy, whom I met, said’. was ‘off my base,’ | F'E, « received at St. George’s, and am very lame with rheumatism contract- ed in cell—face so swelled I can only see out of one eye—will lie down— feel queer—cabin ceiling revolves rapidly—must be very rough out- side, Steward ! $$S$S 222” And this is our only apology for not having a full account of the sport Mr. O’Brien, M.P., has been having with the labor unions, Mr. Butler with the Hon. Henry Hilton, and Colonel Bison-William with | the Roy’l Fam'ly. It must also account for the non-appearance of | our illustration of Mr. Lawrence Donovan winning the Victoria Cross by his Jubilee jump into the Thames, and the 7/ist/e showing the Mayflower that it will have to bloom in the fall as well as the spring- EXTRAWARDINARY. HE “Grand Old Man” of Hawarden, Went out one day in his gawarden 7 Laid his axe on a tree, And said ‘Look at mee; Can't I chop well—axin’ your pawarden ?” AN OCCASIONAL MIRACLE. I OBBY: We don’t have miracles, nowadays, do we, Pa? FATHER: Oh, yes, the New York Giants occasionally win | a game, HE Interstate Commerce Commissioners are consider- ably nonplused over the matter of passing the summer. THE NEW WORLD. Party this side of the fence: ARRAN, MOIKE, AN’ HERE'S A WHOITE SARPANT WRIGGIIN’ THROUGH A HOLE IN THE FINCE, AN’ A-HISSIN’ AT ME! Party of the other sive: AN’ SURE 11’S HAULIN’ A BOW-LEGGED | CHICKEN AFTHER IT! comicbooks.com