Life — March 10, 1887 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TO GILBERT & SULLIVAN. OUR latest operatic freak, Ye gents of ‘‘ Ruddygore,” To use your native idiom, Is a bloody bore. . * . AMES RUSSELL LOWELL has been trying to prove J that Shakespeare did not write * Richard HI.” The ex-Minister to England probably wants to saddle it off on Julian Hawthorne, but he can’t convince us. * * . AKE SHARP believes in the old scriptural intimation that it’s a Broadway that leadeth to destruction. . . . GARSH BERNHARDT lives ina constant state of terror, owing to her fear that the elements may make a mistake some day and strike her for a lightning rod. * . . ECRETARY ENDICOTT wears a military band around his hat. . . . ARTER HARRISON, whose motto is “ Pro bono Pub- lico,” intends retiring to private life. If he does, it will be the Probonest thing the Mayor has yet done for the Publico. . . . HE Trade Dollar Bill has passed. This is not remark- able. Any kind of a dollar bill will pass in the House of Representatives. . . . T is said that Mr. Frank R. Stockton writes his funniest | stories when suffering from neuralgia. What a tremendous sufferer Mr. Stockton must be! . . . O, Gladys, Irish serving maids do not all come from Biddeford any more than French waiters come from Tip-perary. . . . URING her approaching visit to the Continent, Queen Victoria will be known as the Countess Balmoral. The Prince will probably be known as the Marquis of Badmorals. * . . ROFE lightning conductor than a metallic rod. If this is true, there is hardly a chair in a fashionable house that is not absolutely safe from lightning. . . . HE peace that both Germany and France are so anxious to preserve is a piece of territory known as Alsace an¢ Lorraine. SOR HUGHES says a silk ribbon is a better | | AAP RCHIBITION IS? speaker in Jersey City, last week, was so overcome by his bottle of tea, that he kept referring to “Old Hickory” as “Old Chestnut.” . . . "TR is the season when the Episcopalian tries real hard to be a Christian, and eschews tobacco before break- fast, by way of penance. . . . PROVERBS FOR THE MILLION. A KNOB will turn. It’s a short lane that doesn’t go far. HE who runs may read; but he who spends most of his | time reading finds running a laborious exercise. NOTORIETY is the thief of fame. THE wages of sin is death, and pay-day is sure to come sooner or later. . . * N honor of the paragraphers who have largely contributed to her fame, the distinguished New York amateur actress | will hereafter write her name, Mrs. James Brown Gotter. . * * LOOKS LIKE AN OLD ONE, BUT IT’S NEW. “cc S*. Jones, lend me your umbrella, will you?” “Can't.” “Why not?” “ It's——borrowed.” . . . T is unfit that Rutherford B, Hayes, of Ohio, should be denounced any longer as a chicken fancier. The World says : “Allan G.Thurman has the best assortment of chickens in his neighborhood, and takes good care of them.” . . * ] R. HEWITT is barely on his legs again, and not yet able to go out, but he seems to get there notwith- standing. By dint of the kind offices of Chairman Lee, his short letter to the Brooklyn Democratic’ Club has made more stir than Governor Hill's long and able Jeffersonian address. . . . CONGRATULATIONS. M AY we offer our congratulations to our esteemed colored i contemporary Puck, upon having reached the august age of ten years? Puck, we toast thee! Like the ballet girl— “Age cannot wither thee, nor custom stale Thine infinite variety.” : May you live long and prosper, thou that hast reached thy decade without decadence; who, to use a Homeric phrase, dost yank the bun and e’en the Bunner, and whose cartoons are most tuneful in their harmony of tint. comicbooks.com