Life — March 10, 1887 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE QUALITY OF MERCY IS NOT STRAINED. THE litte bridle mule in the nigh lead slipped on the icy pavement, | and Mr. Bergh's best man was on the spot. ‘Take that mule | and have him sharpened before you drive him another foot.” “He is sharpened,” said the drive: rougher than a file. Look at them hind shoes—corks on ‘em that 'ud wedge a hole through an ice- douse.” The officer lifted a hoof to see, and straightway looked over the top of a four-story building. Buzzingly ran the word through the | telephone: ‘One of your men has been nearly killed by a mule.” Tenderly back came the muffled order: ‘See if the mule is hurt, and if it is arrest the man."—Brootlyn Eagle. WE are told that California will produce this year 10,000,000 gallons of wine, one-seventh of which will be turned into brandy. The brandy will mostly be turned into high-priced politicians.—San Francisco Hotel Gazette, ‘Wuen Hobbs returned to his country home after his brief visit to the metropolis, he was asked if he saw many strange things in the city. Wal," replied Hobbs, “I dunno, I seen a lot a curus things, that's a fact; but I guess, by the way them city folks stared at me, that I was about as big a curiosity as there was in the hull city.—os- ton Transcript. Tue Salvation Army stopped in front of a saloon in East Portland and began singing ‘It is water we want, not beer,” and the saloon- keeper turned the hose on them, And yet they were not happy. It is | hard to please some people.—Norristown Herald. 144 A ONE-LEGGED preacher in a Georgia town once upbraided a young man for carrying a gold-headed cane, ‘There are no gold-headed canes in, heaven,” said the man of God. ‘No; and there are no wooden-legged preachers there either,” was the crushing rejoinder.— Atlanta Constitution, In reference to the socialists leaving this land where liberty is alloyed with law, it may be said that they ought in common gratitude to stick to America, since so much of it sticks to them.—San Francisco Hotel Gazette, Why don't the wives of the workingmen strike? They work about eighteen hours a day and get nothing but their board. Perhaps they fear that their masters might bring in scab” wives, and lower the price to half rations. —Ex. Tue Eastern socialists are becoming disgusted with this country and threaten to ‘shake the dust off their feet against America,” and leave her unsympathizing shore forever. We hope that they will s ily execute the latter portion of this threat, but the former— Heaven forfend !—Ex. Child at Washington: Who are all those men lounging around outside the Capitol ? Parent : They are United States senators, my child. ‘Are there any more senators besides them ?” “Only one.” “Where is he?” “He is inside making a speech."—Omaka World. Tue Emperor William of Germany is the tallest monarch, being just six feet. The defunct King of Bavaria was the ‘' shortest,” being in debt several million dollars.—Norristown Herald. IN THE ALPS, Guide : “If the ladies will only stop talking, your honor may hear the roaring of the waterfall across the valley. liegende Blatter. The word * LOWELL" appears ia CAPITAL letters in the back of Lowell, Wilton, and Body- Brussels, at every repeat of the patiern. Look carefully to the trade-marks and be sure you get the geauine LOWELL carpets, For nearly Half a Century Have been acknowledged to be the BEST. The grade has never been lowered, and the Company unhesitatingly challenge com- arison with the production of any manu- | facturer in the world, Sold by all First-class Dealers. The Lowell Inj stick, which the sare wound upon a hollow S, Superior Court decided to be 'd trade-mark. ‘The public are thereby thor- oughly protected against deception. Palmer House, Chicago. |; CELEBRATED HATS ‘ AND ; ULSTERS, etc., for LADIES’ ROUND HATS, — | 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet, 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., NEW YORK, LADIES’ TAILOR, Habit Maker and Hatter, 19 East 21st Street, New York, Also LONDON and NEWPORT, Sonicr. S an inspec- tion from his Lady Patrons of his novelties for GOWNS, COATS, the ensuing season, im- ported from the leading houses in Europe, La- dies who favor me with assured that my estab lishment will, as hereto- 9t4 Chestnut St., Phila, fore, sustain its reputa~ Lundborgs Perfume EDENIA. \Czé: Lundborgs = Rhenish Cologne. Common SENSE BINDER FOR BINDING -LIFE.- , fect fit. Cheap, Strong and Durable, Will hold %& numbers, of the United States for $1. | Address office of - LIFE - 1155 Broanway, N. Y. 4bsolutely Pure! I's Company, New York. tion for taste, style, workmanship and per- All mail orders prompt- ly attended to. A per fect fit guaranteed with- out personal attendance. Mailed to any part 3 od KIMBALL'S Ss. 7 BEEF | & Fp Straight cat cigaretes RXTRACTS Ng = People of refined taste who Dé, (YS desire exceptionally fine cig- Nutritious! Ss oi oy a should use only our Straight Cut, put up in satin packets and boxes of 103, 208, $08, and 1008. 14 Prite Medals, ‘WM. 8S, KIMBALL & Co. a 2) ce) JSBY’S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. thens the intellect, ‘restores lost functions, builds up worn-out weaknesses ‘omotes good + agra Sreger, New York. digestion, cures all and nervousness, For Sate sv Davocisrs, on Mat, $1.00. Io: comicbooks.com