Life — March 3, 1887 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

AT WLLy “TL would make Boston a suburb of glory."—Sam Jones, MARE Boston a subu-b of glory, Sam Jones? Do you know what such sacrilege means ? I fear you have not read the story, Sam Jones, Of that city of culture and beans. You are sailing through breakers and rocks, Sam Jones; A dangerous sea you are tossed on: Hereafter be sure in your talks, Sam Jones, To make glory a suburb of Boston. —Tid- Bit “ CHESTNUTS!" yelled several persons in the gallery at the min- strel show.‘ That's right, gentlemen.” responded Bones, “if you don't get what you want, ask for it."—Pittsburg Dispatch. EASTERN RAILWAY SUPERINTENDENT: ‘ Some delay up the road, Thear?” TELEGRAPH OPERATOR: ‘es, two passenger trains going at the rate of sixty miles an hour came together at Cliff Crossing!” ‘Cliff Crossing? “There is a big embankment at that point.” ** Yes, both trains went over the precipice.” ‘' Well, it won't take long to get the track cleared, then. was afraid it might be something serious."—Omaha World. PACKER’S. TAR SOAP. “‘The Ladies’ Favorite,”’ for all toilet cleansing and purifying purposes ; for preventing chapping, chafing, come- dones, or ‘* flesh-worms,” and other skin affections; for curing dandruff (which if left to continue, causes baldness); for cor- recting the injurious effects of cosmetics ; and for washing the delicate skin of infants. PACKER'S TAR SOAP. Don't ferget the name. BEEF RXTRACTS 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., Palmer House, Chicago. CELEBRATED HATS AND LADIES' ROUND HATS. and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., WEW YORK. 127 PRoFEssoR THoMsoN, of Cambridge, hit his class very neatly when he observed some of them smiling at a slight inadvertence of his own. * Gentlemen,” said he, ‘let us remet r that we are none of us infallible—not even the youngest of us."—New York Ledger. “1. pon't mind giving up my neckties before they're half worn out,” said a society young man yesterday, ** because they look pretty in crazy quilts, but I'm going to draw the line on my married lad friends hereaft st hd G3 asked a friend, ‘* The last lot of scarfs I gave to Mrs. her husband has been wearing ever since.”— Buffalo Courier. THERE is to be an Exhibition of Orchids at the Eden Musee for one week, beginning March 1st, and, to quote the projectors of the enter- prise: "* This display promises to be something unusually superb and interesting, surpassing as it will in many respects all former floral ex- hibitions, as it will be entirely an Orchid Show, and will embrace some five hundred distinct varieties of the most wonderful and interesting species of plants and flowers, natives of all the various tropical coun- tries ; thousands of the most beautiful fantastic blossoms will be ex- hibited, together with their mode of growth and habitation.” “Come in, my poor man,” said a benevolent lady to a ragged tramp, “and I will get you something to eat.” Thanky, mum; don't care if Ido.” "1 bad maces continued the lady, setting a square meal before him, ‘your life has been full of trials?" ‘Vis, mum ; an’ the wust of it'wuz, I allus got convicted."—/udge. . SPECIAL BY CABLE. “THe Queen will be glad when the Jubilee-year closes. Among other forms of annoyance is the pertinacity with which tradesmen send advertising presents, One of the most singular of these isa garment that plays ‘God Save the Queen’ when the wearer sits down.*— Extract English Paper. Her Majesty's confidence in Redfern ‘ ideas” remains, however, unimpaired. LADIES’ TAILOR, Habit Maker and Hatter, 19 East 2!st Street, New York, Also LONDON and NEWPORT, SOLICITS an inspec- tion from his Lady Patrons of his povelties tor GOWNS, COATS, ULSTERS, etc., for the ensuing season, im- ported from the leading houses in Europe. La- dies who favor me with their patronage can be assured that my estab- bet, 22d & 23d Sts., ‘9%4 Chestnut St., Phila. Delicious! Nutritious! Absolutely Pure! The Cibils Company, New York. ONE should FAIL to examine the merits of the IMPERIAL BURNER, which gives the most brilliant and per- fect light produced by any Lamp known. On exhibition, lighted, in a selection af Lamps specially imported this season SENT FOR TRIAL, POST PAID, MOREL | TWENTY-FIVE CTS. workmanship and per fect fit. ‘All mail orders prompt- ly attended to, A per- fect fit guaranteed with- out personal attendance, SPENCERICAIN 26 SELECTED PENS | Ivison, Blakeman & Co. 783 & 765 Broadway, NEW YORK. STEEL PENS \Are the Best. y —— = oe — BENNETT (B. SCHNEIDER, |" CROSBY'S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. 37 Park Place, New York. The best satisfaction guaranteed, or you can have your moncy returned, Strengthens the intellect, restores lost functions, builds up worn-out nerves, promotes good digestion, cures all weaknesses and nervousness. s6 Wast osru Sraxzr, New Yorx. For Sars sy Davocists, om Mam, $1.00. comicbooks.com